ROYAL SEX TAPE? "Two blackmailers demanded £50,000 from a member of the Royal Family for tapes claiming he performed a gay sex act on an aide, it was claimed yesterday. The tapes also featured claims the alleged victim - who cannot be named - was guilty of dodgy business dealings and complained of another royal exposing himself to him, the Old Bailey heard."
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Whenever I read "gay sex act," I start hearing circus music and a carnival barker. "Step right up, see death-defying stunts in our gay sex act! The Gayest sex act east of the Mississippi."
If it's east of the Mississippi it's probably something to do with sweet tea and some white gravy.