Some Cars Are Bigger Than Others

Dear Jessica Alba,

Thank you for driving a Toyota Prius. Knowing that you, a wealthy person with many options in the way of vehicles, made an informed decision and purchased a globally-conscious hybrid gives us hope for a brighter future in which your unborn child can flourish.




Jan 16, 2008 · posted by Cord Jefferson, MollyGood · Link · 43 Responses
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Comments (43)

No. 1 evil twin says:

Oh, horse shit. The Prius is a status symbol to let everyone know you are all environmentally-conscious. They do make other models of cars that are equally friendly to Mother Earth.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 1:52 pm
No. 2 Angela says:

The extra energy those cars require to make don’t offset the emission savings.

They do change consumer perceptions however, which is the first step I spose.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 2:09 pm
No. 3 brandon says:

The Mercedes S 420 CDI actually has a lower C02 emision output than the Prius b/c it’s diesel but its much nicer and faster. The Prius is really over-rated.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 2:11 pm
No. 4 Speedmonkey says:

then get over yourself and move to Canada. but, at least she’s trying…

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 2:23 pm
No. 5 Cord Jefferson, MollyGood says:

@ everyone

Emissions outputs aren’t the only concern. Hybrids are a nice step toward an America that isn’t reliant on oil with origins in tumultuous countries that don’t really like us.


Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 2:24 pm
No. 6 Kitchy says:

EVIL!! My love, my love, why hast thou forsaken me??

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 2:26 pm
No. 7 dani says:

it turns out that way more pollution is created when making the hybrid cars than making AND driving normal cars. it doesn’t do anything to help the environment.. it’s basically just trendy.. the “i really do care” celebrity approach to saving the environment without actually doing anything.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 2:45 pm
No. 8 brandon says:

If she wants to reduce America’s dependency on oil thats good but that doesn’t really have anything to do w/ building a “clean world” for her child. If she wanted to help clean up the world’s air supply she should opt for a car the does the best job @ contributing the least to CO2 levels.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 2:50 pm
No. 9 cooter says:

I dont give a shit about this stuck up ho. Its snowing in Ga. The happiness is curing my hangover. Curses to 2 hags (again)

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 2:51 pm
No. 10 mae says:

Prius owners can blow me. Plus, they’re ugly cars.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:01 pm
No. 11 jujubees says:

Prius makes me think, Dicaprio. Which makes me want to kick something. That ugly car will do. If we really want to cut down on oil dependancy they would finally come out with those hover cars, like on the Jetsons. I was promised one of those and a silver jumpsuit when I was a child and I’m still waiting.

Remember those Disney cartoons? My dishwasher is supposed to clean dishes on it’s own and my car is supposed to fold up into a handly little briefcase I can tote around.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:10 pm
No. 12 stopthemadness says:

agreed, ET. Priuses in LA are status symbols. I have a friend who got one because the waiting list was so long and Priuses just so damn cool. Her other choice? A Jag.


Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:11 pm
No. 13 stopthemadness says:

Priuses *are* just so damn cool.

Where’s my vodka tonic?

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:11 pm
No. 14 janice says:

Please don’t tell me Jessica Alba is getting un-ironic kudos. What kind of world are we living in?

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:12 pm
No. 15 jujubees says:

A world with no jet packs or food pellets.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:18 pm
No. 16 janice says:

They’d better be hybrid jetpacks when they happen, to save the environment for the babies. They can still be manufactured in China, of course. That’s not the environment we’re worried about.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:20 pm
No. 17 mae says:

I’m all for a Jetsons world. So I wouldn’t have to bathe, dress, primp, feed myself.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:22 pm
No. 18 jujubees says:

You’d get to wear that cool plastic hair.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:36 pm
No. 19 stopthemadness says:

it’s 2008. shouldn’t we have flying cars by now? this is bullshit.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:45 pm
No. 20 jujubees says:

That’s all I’m sayin. Where are the flying cars? And you know how when you go to the mall. Where are the transporting floors so you don’t have to walk. Like at the airport. This is the doing of the oil company. they don’t want us to have flying cars that are fueled by hugs and kisses.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 3:52 pm
No. 21 deimos says:

those bastards.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:00 pm
No. 22 janice says:

Can I at least have my hairdryer that runs on happy thoughts?

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:02 pm
No. 23 bedbugsandballyhoo says:

Some cars’ mothers are bigger than other cars’ mothers.
True story.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:08 pm
No. 24 jujubees says:

No, they’ll find you. Can I add there is a story all over the news about a city here in Texas, Stevensville. 50 or so people saw a UFO. WHY? WHYYYYYY? Is there not enough to live down over here? Or maybe it’s my flying car but I’m not sure why it’s still not here?

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:08 pm
No. 25 bedbugsandballyhoo says:

Just walk everywhere or take the Metro.??? I don’t even know why people bother with cars anymore. There’s so outdated. Just like the dinosaurs.
Did that sound preachy and condescending enough?

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:15 pm
No. 26 jujubees says:

No. Your missing some caps and extra……….. and throw in a few!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:19 pm
No. 27 bedbugsandballyhoo says:

UR RIGHT JUJU!!!…….. DUH!!!…….. I have to MAKE it LOOK like I’m trying to get a TWO YEAR-OLD!!! to understand ADVANCED CALCULUS!!!…….. GEEZ!!! U GUYZ don’t GET IT B/C… well……LOOK IT UP!!!!

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:25 pm
No. 28 jujubees says:

You forgot the salutations


Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:33 pm
No. 29 Lily the Pink says:

Cameron Diaz drives one, too. Cord, any thoughts?

bedbugsanbollyhoo, since I moved from DC I’ve gained close to 5 lbs. I miss being able to walk everywhere. It was my gym. I don’t miss the claustrophobic nature of the Metro at rush hour, though…nor the frotteurists…

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:35 pm
No. 30 janice says:


Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:36 pm
No. 31 bedbugsandballyhoo says:

No wonder those people seem so slow all the time. All that yelling in your brain is quite mind numbing.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:36 pm
No. 32 bedbugsandballyhoo says:

And those bomb threats on the Red Line during afternoon rush hour can really throw a kink in your travel plans.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 4:41 pm
No. 33 Be Adequite says:

Dear Jessica-

But you’re also still a stuck up bit%h. Oh, and guarantee you’ll be fat after you pop out that kiddo. And you suck at acting. And your fiancee is a slut.


Be Adequite!

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 5:00 pm
No. 34 Be Adequite says:

Oh I forgot something- HI EVIL!!!! ***kisses***

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 5:01 pm
No. 35 Lily the Pink says:

bedbugsandballyhoo, true story, we were sitting in the Chipotle on Connecticut near the zoo, and suddenly the big black SUVs and a very large number of cop cars caming screaming over Taft Bridge, and we, of course, wondered what was going on. Turns out the train was behind schedule so the operator put it in express mode which meant it would skip two stops. Someone didn’t hear the announcement and called the police to report the train had been highjacked. I still can’t figure out that one. Did they think terrorists would be in a real hurry to get to Shady Grove? “Either I get to Rockville without delay, or no one gets to Rockville ever again!” Cue maniacal laugh.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 5:02 pm
No. 36 blah says:

The nice thing about diesel vehicles is that they can be converted to run off of grease. Going to a McDonalds and using thier oil is great because it’s free and it runs better than fresh oil because all the potential water has been burned out of it. Also, when you run your car, it smells like french fries instead of diesel fumes.

Cleaning the oil is a bit tedious, but it gets excellent gas mileage, it’s free, it doesn’t come from a barrel in Saudi Arabia, and it’s not dangerous for the environment.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 5:31 pm
No. 37 bedbugsandballyhoo says:

I went in to meet my husband for lunch one day. When I headed out to go back home, the entire Red Line was shut down because someone left a “mysterious package” in the Rockville station. I went shopping for a couple of hours and then met my husband at Old Ebbitt. Several hours and a couple of bottles of wine later we still couldn’t leave. We were “stuck” there until nearly 10:00 PM. It was so awful.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 5:32 pm
No. 38 blah says:

I’d personally rather ride around in a BMW than a Prius. I think they are cute, but my car needs to be like me…I have a big trunk and therefore, so must my car.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 5:33 pm
No. 39 Gretchen says:

Alba’s progeny will be gorgeous.
The Prius is too expensive.
THANK YOU for a wonderful Smith’s reference in your subhead. ;)

Mollygood is good …

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 6:41 pm
No. 40 queencrone says:

The prius is so quiet. It sounds like it’s not even running. Does it make beep sounds when it backs up, cause if not, I predict problems.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 9:19 pm
No. 41 blah says:

I think it would be cute if it politely cleared it’s throat or something when backing up. The beeping is reserved for those big things at Home Depot.

Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 9:25 pm
No. 42 queencrone says:


Posted: Jan 16, 2008 at 9:40 pm
No. 43 Jessy says:

Does anyone know what kind of shoes those are?

Posted: Jan 19, 2008 at 2:42 pm
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