You're a Mom of Two, Bitch!

An addled, addling Britney Spears has once again loosed her vagina onto the world. You may see it here.

Sep 11, 2007 · Link · 77 Responses
Related Posts

• 09/21/07: Spears Teaching Baby to Share? (Comments: 18)
• 09/19/07: Lowest Common Denominators (Comments: 14)
• 09/19/07: Mommy Loves the Nightlife (Comments: 55)
• 09/17/07: Lowest Common Denominators (Comments: 19)
• 09/14/07: Lowest Common Denominators (Comments: 69)
Comments (77)

No. 1 deimos says:

no thank you, i’d rather stab myself in the eyes with my pen…it’d be less painful than looking at a pic of brit’s ham wallet.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:20 pm
No. 2 seyour says:

Yawn. You know what was more interesting than seeing Britney’s vajayjay for the upteemth time? The range of adverts accompaning the shot:

“Letterbox Flapping?”
“Gazebo and Party Tents”
“Create A Virtual Pet”
“Greeting Cards Online”

Nice metaphors. I was amused.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:23 pm
No. 3 seyour says:

Ham wallet. I\m using that from now on. I’ll never look at Prosciutto the same way again.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:24 pm
No. 4 deimos says:

lol sorry. :)

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:33 pm
No. 5 April says:

ham wallet ::vomits::

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:44 pm
No. 6 jujubees says:

With all the abuse Britney has inflicted on it, I’d say it’s more like a fanny pack. Uhhhh, dry heaves, sorry.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:47 pm
No. 7 evil twin says:

Or swiss cheetohs.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:49 pm
No. 8 janice says:

I think I’m scarred for life.

Just like a certain someone’s ham wallet!!
(Wait… did I just compare myself to… I did?… *Vomits*)

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:52 pm
No. 9 scandelirious says:

What is it about not wearing underwear that is so appealing? Is it the slight breeze? I personally hate not wearing underwear… it just feels wrong.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:52 pm
No. 10 Kitchy says:

Wait, is this in addition to the one from yesterday that happened right after the VMAs?

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:54 pm
No. 11 deimos says:

all sluts on the go refrain from wearing underwear

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:55 pm
No. 12 evil twin says:

That what I was wondering. Is this a back-to-back offense or the same one?

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:56 pm
No. 13 deimos says:

no, i think it’s the same one kitchy…cord just has a delayed reaction to things.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:56 pm
No. 14 Kitchy says:

I thought he already posted yesterday’s, though. You know, unlike the Halle confirmation.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:57 pm
No. 15 deimos says:

i could be wrong…i did have to do some actual work yesterday so i might have missed it. farking work.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 2:58 pm
No. 16 evil twin says:

Nah, I’m pretty sure there was one yesterday, although I can’t swear that I am not confused because I already saw it on 80 other sites.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:03 pm
No. 17 Kitchy says:

It’s in yesterday’s LCD. So someone go click on both links for me and tell me if it’s the same story.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:09 pm
No. 18 deimos says:

i’m afraid i’ll see the ham wallet if i do kitchy

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:09 pm
No. 19 Kitchy says:

C’mon, can’t you do this one little thing for li’l ol’ Kitchy?

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:11 pm
No. 20 deimos says:

oh ok, if i don’t make it back it’ll be because i had to stab my eyes with my pen.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:13 pm
No. 21 Kitchy says:

Then type blindly. I’ll forgive typos.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:14 pm
No. 22 deimos says:

same one…i think bunnie just wanted to post his little chart.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:14 pm
No. 23 Kitchy says:

I bet he just wanted to prove that contrary to popular belief, he can in fact find a woman’s vagina.

With the help of a chart.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:16 pm
No. 24 evil twin says:

Does Cord find Britney’s hey-nanny-nanny so hot that it merits two posts? Ew.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:16 pm
No. 25 evil twin says:

Psst, Kitch, how much are you betting? Remember, he doesn’t take checks.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:17 pm
No. 26 Kitchy says:

I bet deimos’ soul.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:17 pm
No. 27 jujubees says:

LOL Deimos, I am a slut on the run. I am a fan of commando. But the rule is, hide your junk. There is a way to get out of a car without flashing the beav.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:17 pm
No. 28 Kitchy says:

“Ward, I think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night.”

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:18 pm
No. 29 deimos says:

i see how you roll kitchy, i risk seeing the ham wallet and you bet my soul.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:18 pm
No. 30 jujubees says:

If she’s going to flash us the least she could do is bedazzle her ham wallet.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:20 pm
No. 31 evil twin says:

deimos, have fun with your new boyfriend, Lucifer. I hear he’s pretty hot.

*Zing!*

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:22 pm
No. 32 Kitchy says:

You’re right, deimos. I apologize and offer up juju’s soul instead.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:22 pm
No. 33 deimos says:

satan is going to be pissed when he finds out my soul already belongs to L Ron…he won it in a raffle last year.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:23 pm
No. 34 deimos says:

i still heart you kitchy ;)

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:23 pm
No. 35 Kitchy says:

In a smackdown between L Ron and Satan, who do you put your money on?

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:25 pm
No. 36 evil twin says:

Trick question, L. Ron IS Satan.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:26 pm
No. 37 admittedlyaddicted says:

*lol* you guys are crazy. stupid effing work is making me miss all the fun.

this is a fly-by hi…hopefully I will return to slacker status shortly. Ah, the woes of the end of the month…

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:26 pm
No. 38 deimos says:

L Ron would smack the theatins right out of satan’s bitch ass

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:26 pm
No. 39 deimos says:

admitted- i hear you. this week is too farking busy.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:27 pm
No. 40 jujubees says:

I’m telling Tom you said that Kitchy. They got Cord and your next.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:27 pm
No. 41 deimos says:

L Ron says he can’t stand tom, that’s why he always tries to avoid him at parties…true story.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:29 pm
No. 42 Kitchy says:

There’s a white van parked outside my office door.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:29 pm
No. 43 evil twin says:

I’ll create a diversion while you run, Kitchy.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:30 pm
No. 44 Kitchy says:

Show ‘em yer tits, evil.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:32 pm
No. 45 deimos says:

they’re attracted to shiney objects…just throw your keys and make a break for it.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:32 pm
No. 46 evil twin says:

Normally, I charge for that, Kitchy, but I guess I’ll make an exception this time.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:35 pm
No. 47 jujubees says:

Too bad you didn’t read the fine print on the Tom-Ba juice. It contains microscopic homing devices. Ha, run Kitchy, RUN. They’ll find you in every Starbucks and Krispy Kreme. Can you pick me up some glazed and a pumpkin spice latte? Mmmmm.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:44 pm
No. 48 Kitchy says:

Screw that!

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:45 pm
No. 49 jujubees says:

No, I mean, get some for you too, I’m belevolent like that. It will be like your living in, The Minority Report. It should have won and Oscar.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:49 pm
No. 50 evil twin says:

So I showed the goods for free and it’s all for naught? I feel so ashamed.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:50 pm
No. 51 Kitchy says:

I much appreciate it, evil. So it’s not TOTALLY for naught.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:56 pm
No. 52 jujubees says:

Yes, appreciation is just as good as money.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 3:57 pm
No. 53 Kitchy says:

I’ll give you half of juju’s soul as payment, evil.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 4:00 pm
No. 54 evil twin says:

Ok, I’ll take it.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 4:02 pm
No. 55 jujubees says:

It won’t get you much. It’s a black barren wasteland in there. If you look in my soul you can see a rousing game of Tron.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 4:10 pm
No. 56 Cait says:

With the revenue from the first quarter of the Tomba Corp., I’m pretty sure we can afford to send Ms. Spears this:

http://www.hoonthego.com/

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 4:12 pm
No. 57 jujubees says:

I have a feeling this was created by Terrance Howard. The moist towlettes are a dead giveaway.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 4:20 pm
No. 58 April says:

i like the ho on the go thing

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 4:39 pm
No. 59 evil twin says:

Where was this when I was in college?

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 4:40 pm
No. 60 yourmom says:

“Feel the night’s residue melt away with revitalizing armoatherapy towelettes by terrance howard”

I’m not sure you can “wipe away” what Brit Brit has going on down there…
Ew. Sometimes I gross myself out)

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:00 pm
No. 61 evil twin says:

I think she would be better off using a blowtorch, rather than the towelettes.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:05 pm
No. 62 jujubees says:

Radiate it just to be sure.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:08 pm
No. 63 Cait says:

Well, given all the trauma to said vajayjay of late (and by “trauma,” I mean exposure to Criss Angel), a blowtorch might be a bit grating. Perhaps a tiny chef’s torch could turn that double-wide into a delicate creme brulee?

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:09 pm
No. 64 yourmom says:

Comparing Brit’s vajayjay to a delicious dessert is just plain icky

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:12 pm
No. 65 Cait says:

Like I said, perhaps it just requires a delicate touch.

No?

All right, fine, let’s authorize a surgical nuclear strike.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:15 pm
No. 66 jujubees says:

I had this weird War Games flashback. I hope her ladylumps won’t call me on the phone asking me if I want to play a game.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:19 pm
No. 67 yourmom says:

Does Tomba Corp. have that kind of money and authority? If so, I beseech you, why is this just being considered now?

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:22 pm
No. 68 Cait says:

Is Matthew Broderick going to guide the war against Britney’s vajayjay?

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:22 pm
No. 69 Cait says:

Tomba required quite a bit of start-up capital and buy in from Xenu’s top-level execs.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:23 pm
No. 70 yourmom says:

Ah, completely understandable. I’m pretty sure SJP will keep Matthew Broderick as far from Brit’s “ham wallet” as possible. There will be too many casualties in that war.
Besides, I don’t see him as a great war leader, and this will take someone FIERCE! Maybe Tyra???

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:28 pm
No. 71 Cait says:

Tyra’s forehead could potentially blind Britney into complacency. Now there’s a thought…

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:31 pm
No. 72 yourmom says:

Remember that episode of America’s Next Top Model when Tyra went OFF that girl Tiffany for not caring after she was eliminated?? She needs to go ghetto Tyra on Britney’s ass.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:37 pm
No. 73 jujubees says:

I say we send in Tim Gunn. He’ll make that shit work.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 5:40 pm
No. 74 rachel says:

Why is it we are always talking about some kind of body part on here. Breast and vaginas to be exact.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 7:38 pm
No. 75 Cait says:

That’s an easy one. Cord has vajayjay envy, clearly.

Posted: Sep 11, 2007 at 7:39 pm
No. 76 deimos says:

that and now that cord has held a newborn his body has started producing breast milk.

Posted: Sep 12, 2007 at 2:22 pm
No. 77 evil twin says:

Can I get a shot of that in my coffee, Cord. We’re out of creamer.

Posted: Sep 12, 2007 at 2:35 pm

You must log in to post a comment.

Need an account? Sign up! Registration is free and easy.