Poor Martin Sheen. A lifetime of amazing work, and you are reduced to being the straight man for ol' Wonky McValtrex?

Ugh… that was as entertaining as staring at a bowl of oatmeal. And not nearly as delicious.

I still have a weird, random old-man crush on Martin Sheen. This isn't doing much to kill it, actually. Not very funny, IMO, but eh.

It's ok, em, me too. It's his boyish charm, I suppose. And also the fact that he must be a helluva guy to have not disowned Charlie Sheen by now.

Most real people, no matter how repulsive and unlikeable, have at least a few positive qualities. It's still okay to hate them.

I have the same thing! Damn you Martin Sheen. And yet, nothing for Emilio Estevez who looks just like him. I must be attracted to success.

Is it me or have her tits got bigger?

Come on! "The biggest depression since The Notebook", that's pure gold! I can totally see a sitcom spinoff. Paris moves into the White House, renames it the DC Hilton and makes people compete for cabinet posts (Secretary of Interior should really be able to spruce up the Lincoln Bedroom, Foreign Affairs has to be promiscuous, etc…). Foreign dignitaries have to follow her to the spa and on shopping sprees so she can show them her love of Italy, France and the UK (Fendi, LV and Burberry) and some even have to join her slumber parties. The possibilities are endless.

Please, jackattack. MTV would make a reality show about a yorkie with a cellphone right now. Don't give them any ideas.

@Haydn She has magical boobies. They can be flat as Texas one day, and as mountainous as the Rockies the next. I want to know what the hell kind of bra that is.

Touche Janice.

evil twin–maybe they're those prosthetic, rubber fake boobs with nipples stuffed into bras…

Love the way Sheen acts circles around Hilton. I just know that's because Paris chose to dial down her acting abilities. She didn't wanna embarrass her co-star. That's what ya call teamwork, and a bold acting choice. Kudos, Paris.

She's an insufferable twit 100% of the time. Even if the clip was funny, she only read some lines. I don't think it is, though.

I think I read somewhere that she promotes some amazing bra that pushes em way up - don't know what it's called though.

Also, Chelsea, have you SEEN The Mighty Ducks Series??? Gold!!!

Sorry Molly but the comments to the video were funnier to read than watching Paris speak will ever be.

Oh definitely Gold AdAd! I'm just not all hot under the collar for Estevez. Probably the smell of desperation, even back then.

i'm not gonna lie she got me with "well, this *is* the biggest depression since the notebook."

martin sheen can do no wrong in my book.

Bartlett/Sideways Vagina 2012!!!

i think not reading or thinking about paris hilton for the last oh, 6 months or so, has softened me to her.

yeah, she was reading lines, but it's better than news about her *doing* lines.

AM I RITE?!

hahaha janice :)

hey who's older? m. sheen or michael douglas?? douglas looks older but maybe it's just the surgery.

key, you know there's no molly at mollygood, right? sad fact.

didn't there used to be? i wasn't here, but i think i heard through the grapevine, yeaux.

Who woulda thunk that getting into Cindy McCain's makeup bag would make someone funny?

Great writing. Me likey.

Wow why would Martin Sheen stup so low as to do anything around pathetic paris,someone should be fired to make him do that!!

Paris looks like she's about 40 now,when is she just going to give it up,she is such a joke no matter what age,there are so many other women that look better at 40 then her!!!