IT’S ABOUT TIME “Authorities in Malawi are set to grant full adoption rights of an African boy to US pop star Madonna, a high court official indicated Friday, citing a leaked document. The official … said the court in Lilongwe would hear a full review on May 15 of an 18-month interim custody order granted in 2006 for Madonna to adopt David Banda. The court had also received recommendations from the ministry of women and child development to make the adoption permanent.”

Apparently, even in Africa, rap shows are powder kegs constantly on the verge of mass hysteria.

Watch this video to see a man with giant balls jump onstage at a 50 Cent concert in Angola, Africa, snatch Fiddy’s iced-out chain and then make a break for it. And then watch as all hell breaks loose and thousands of hip hop fans give Bill O’Reilly et al more fuel for their anti-rap fire.

The robbery begins at about 1′35″ in. Enjoy.

Evil partygoer Paris Hilton recently accompanied boyfriend Benji Madden to South Africa, a country historically known for its abundance of unwelcome whites. While there, Hilton treated the nation the way a child does a toy store, sporadically pointing at things and demanding to know if she could own them:

“Every time Paris saw something she liked, like a woman’s dress, she would ask how much it was. That included a cheetah she saw at an animal park. She asked how much it was and said, ‘If I bought a cheetah, would it run away from me or could I keep it?’”

Thank God Paris was born after 1865, huh?

Paris Hilton, on her recent travels through Africa: “I love Africa in general — South Africa and West Africa, they are both great countries.”

New disaster in “the dark continent“! Scandalous woman of means Paris Hilton toured a school in South Africa yesterday, just as she warned everyone she would. The Great White Dope touched black toddlers, let them touch her and handed out autographed photos of herself in a bikini. Charity? Not at all; this is a private school and all these kids are rich, rich, rich. Hilton’s there to fish for compliments and give the older girls eating disorders. She’s really great, isn’t she?

Click through for more photos and a look at a younger Paris being much less kind to black people.

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Drew Barrymore is donating $1 million to the World Food Programme to help feed children in Africa. She made this announcement, of course, on today’s Oprah Winfrey Show.

I have seen with my own eyes what a difference a simple cup of nutritious porridge can make in a child’s life. It helps them learn, stay healthy and sets them on track for a bright future.

Um, is this “nutritious porridge” the same thing as Adnan’s milky soup? Because if it is, those children of Africa don’t want any of your charity, Drew.

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Vanity Fair’s July issue, an Africa-themed edition guest-edited by Bono, will feature 20 different star-studded cover photos taken by Annie Liebovitz. The goal of the shoot, Bono said, was to “bring some sex appeal to the idea of wanting to change the world.” Here’s a thought, Bono: try bringing some money to the idea of wanting to change the world.

To be sure, what this whole pitiful—surely catered—charade amounts to is nothing more than rich people with the best of intentions exerting very little effort in the hopes that it will make a difference. But despite their aspirations, the fact is that this gesture will probably prove to be relatively meaningless.

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Here’s Madonna holding some baby. Not the new one. I guess one of the old ones.

It was announced today that Madonna did, in fact, adopt a one-year-old Malawian boy (that she choose from a group and will take home sometime). Reuters reports:

Pop diva Madonna adopted a young boy in Malawi on Wednesday and moved ahead with plans to fund a center for 1,000 orphans, many of whom lost parents to AIDS in the impoverished African nation.

The “Material Girl” and an entourage arrived in the Malawian capital Lilongwe by private plane early on Wednesday and were quickly whisked away to an undisclosed location in a fleet of cars and trucks.

Government officials said the 48-year-old singer, already a mother of two, chose the one-year-old orphan from among 12 children specially chosen prior to her arrival in the country, which has legions of children orphaned by the AIDS epidemic.

“She asked us to identify boys only, which we have done after visiting four orphanages in Lilongwe,” government spokeswoman Adrina Michiela said. Michiela said Madonna had wanted to adopt a girl but changed her mind two weeks ago.

It was unclear whether Madonna, for whom Malawi waived its ban on non-resident adoptions, would leave the country with her adopted baby or whether they would be reunited at a later date.

No further details on the new babe, or why she made the last minute switch from female to male baby, but congrats to Madge and her family on their new edition. I’ll keep you updated as details emerge.

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Madonna is high kicking her way further into the hearts of the masses by donating a huge amount of money to orphans in the African country of Malawi. And to think, its only partially Kaballah-y. Time has the exclusive story:

She has already committed to raising at least $3 million to fund programs particularly aimed at orphans there. Of Malawi’s population of 12 million, about a million are orphans. Ground has just been broken on an orphan care center, which aims to feed and educate as many as 1,000 children a day. She has also formed a partnership with developing-world economic guru Jeffrey Sachs on programs to improve the health, agriculture and economy of a village nearby. She’s financing—to the tune of about $1 million—a documentary about the plight of children there. And she has met with Bill Clinton to see if they can work together to bring low-cost medicinesto the area, as well as partnering with several aid organizations. This, mind you, is all before Madonna has ever even set foot in Africa. (She plans to go in October.)

“For the last few years—now that I have children and now that I have what I consider to be a better perspective on life—I have felt responsible for the children of the world,” says Madonna, taking a break between London concert dates . “I’ve been doing bits and bobs about it and I suppose I was looking for a big, big project I could sink my teeth into.” The “better perspective” she attributes to Kabbalah, the study of Jewish mysticism. Her co-founder in the Raising Malawi project is Michael Berg, founder of the Kabbalah center in Los Angeles and one of the driving forces behind its growing popularity. And although it has no religious affiliation, the orphan-care center—which will be like a day camp for orphans, who often have relatives who will give them a place to sleep but cannot feed them—will offer programs based on Spirituality for Kids, Kabbalah’s children’s program. “One of the main precepts of Kabbalah is that we’re put on this earth to help people,” says Madonna. “And your job is to figure out how you can help, and what it is that you can do.”

Sachs, who has also worked with the Jolie-Pitts and Bono in Africa, goes on to say that Madonna’s intentions are genuine and all that jazz. Little red strings for every orphan!

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