I’m in a giving mood today, so instead of the usual reminder that the world is going to hell, I’ll leave you all with this sweet video of a lion and his human “parents.” Feel free to cry — I did.
MOTHAFUCKIN’ SHARK WEEK IS BACK! “They never set out to be television stars, any more than they sought Hollywood fame in those Steven Spielberg movies. But sharks remain among the most enduring (if unlikeliest) members of TV’s A-list. Just consider Shark Week, the summer programming event on Discovery Channel since 1988. Once again, sharks are in the spotlight as Shark Week promotes respect and appreciation for these remarkable animals (with excitement also part of the mix). … This year’s new fare includes tonight’s ‘Surviving Sharks,’ in which Les Stroud, host of Discovery’s ‘Survivorman,’ offers tips for water safety and tests popular theories for surviving shark encounters.”
We haven’t seen Nigel Barker in quite some time and now we know why: He’s been busy saving baby seals. Last night he attended an NYC art exhibit titled “A Sealed Fate” with all the big A-listers, like Whitney from America’s Next Top Model and some guy from Project Runway. So it’s safe to say things aren’t looking too good for those seals.
[Source]
In what should come as a shock to absolutely no one, PETA announced that it is upset with The Dark Knight because of a short scene in which Batman beats a few dogs in self-defense. PETA obviously has nothing better to complain about.
But to really show Batman the error of his ways, the animal rights organization removed him from its list of Top 10 Animal-Friendly Superheroes. Ouch. There’s also some great lines in the rant: “They didn’t need to make Batman into a dogphobic man!” True poetry. Then PETA asks, “Doesn’t the man with the James Bond gadgets know anything about peanut butter treats and deflecting devices?” Um, PETA? Did you even see the movie or are you simply unaware of how dumb you sound?
Click through for the complete inanity. CONTINUED »
The always PR-savvy Lauren Conrad offered a swift rebuttal after yesterday’s attacks from organizers of a Humane Society fashion show who claimed LC threw a hissy fit and bailed before fulfilling all of her obligations. We would have refused to walk the stupid runway with those poor dogs dressed in human clothes as well, so we really can’t judge. Lauren, however, says otherwise — and went to MySpace to give her side of the story. She threw in a few grammatical errors for good measure, just in case anyone thought the blog was written by her publicist (we’re still not convinced).
Click through for her statement. Spoiler alert: We’re guessing she’s no longer going to be happy posing for pictures with Wendy Diamond (at left).
The Humane Society and Animal Fair magazine hosted a “Paws for Style” dog-fashion show last night in NYC, which sounded harmless enough until gossip started to spread about the backstage drama involving — who else? — The Hills’ Lauren Conrad. Evidently Lauren, who was flown to NYC first-class by the Humane Society, was scheduled to close the fashion show featuring celebrities and socialites who coordinated matching outfits with either their own dog or a rescue. (The outfits will be sold on eBay for charity.)
Lauren, however, had other plans, which included buckling under pressure on the red carpet with hard-hitting questions such as, “What kind of dog is it?” She later announced that she wasn’t aware she was supposed to walk the runway and bailed without fully honoring her commitment. One unhappy organizer said it best: “There’s no cats here, so we didn’t need any catfights.” That’s deep.
But let’s get down to the real matter at hand, shall we? What did these poor dogs ever do to deserve these stupid outfits and trips down the runway? None of them look amused — in fact, one seems to be saying, “Can I go back to the shelter now?”
I walked through Union Square on my way to acting class and got offered loose joints. Drug dealing was a great tradition in this city.
There are other traditions people can get involved with in this city. When I was younger, I used to get a bottle of wine and get drunk under the Staten Island Ferry… so there are things like that you can do.
-PETA spokesperson Alec Baldwin on what New York City tourists can do besides ride in cruel horse-drawn carriages
Last week Queerty editor Andrew Belonsky shared a child’s rendering of his dead hamster, a piece of art that may be the most profound — and adorable! — illustration of death’s mystifying effects. Luckily for us, there were more where that came from, and he graciously captured a few other drawings for public consumption. They’re no “Hamster what?” but magic like that only comes along once in a lifetime.
Because everyone loves elementary art, the front window of Queerty editor Andrew Belonsky’s neighborhood vet currently features some childrens’ renderings of their pets.
As you can see, one local child recently lost their hamster and, like so many people, has a hard time grappling the concept of death.
On Friday, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen will turn 22 years old. We’re assuming you would like to send gifts to the twins, so PETA has a great suggestion: Cut off some of your hair and mail it to the girls with a note reading, “Please, use my hair instead of the animals’. Happy birthday.” Because that’s not creepy at all.
But according to one of the PETA crazies, it’s totally justified:
Mary-Kate and Ashley are old enough now to know that fur doesn’t grow on trees. … We hope that on their birthday, they will take a moment to think about the many animals who won’t live to see another birthday thanks to the twins’ abominable taste in clothes.
Call us crazy, but if the twins haven’t responded to years of nagging and the Trollsen Twins Web site, it’s doubtful they’re going to suddenly have a moment of revelation after receiving a bunch of creepy hair dolls in the mail.
[Source]
FANCY “On-stage villains aren’t the only vermin at the Metropolitan Opera. The grand theater at Lincoln Center, where much of New York’s society gathers to show off gowns and jewels, has been cited for sanitary violations by the city Department of Health and Mental Hygiene. During an April 9 restaurant inspection at the Met, the department found ‘evidence of mice or live mice present in facility’s food and/or nonfood areas.’”
This little guy, Oscar, is one of the world’s most popular dogs among Hollywood circles. He has been photographed with the likes of George Clooney and John Travolta thanks to his owner, Dennis Gill, who sold newspapers to celebrities in London. Oscar recently lost his three-year battle with cancer, but his legacy will live on through the animal lovers of the blogosphere.
[Source]
Pete Doherty just posted a new video to his YouTube account, and it is a complete and utter nightmare, to put it mildly. Amy Winehouse is still around, and the two have decided to nurture some tiny baby mice. Oh, and Pete’s poor kittens are still miraculously alive. Hopefully PETA will stop putting whores in cages and actually do something worthwhile, like taking these innocent little animals away from the two worst pet owners on the planet.
The polar bear was today recognized by the Bush administration as a “threatened” species. This means that, under the Endangered Species Act, the majestic, apex predator of the Arctic is just one step away from endangered and two steps away from extinction.
Indeed, scientists are concerned. But the Bush administration doesn’t give a fuck about scientists. Nor do they give a fuck about you, your kids or your kid’s kids. That’s why there’s this little addendum:
A threatened listing under the Endangered Species Act (ESA) is supposed to provide broad protection to polar bears. Greenpeace, however, noted an exemption (technically known as a 4d exemption) for global warming pollution contained in the ruling.
“Global warming is the biggest threat facing polar bears and this exemption eliminates any real protection the listing could have provided,” the group said. “It specifically says federal agencies don’t need to consider the impact of global warming pollution on the polar bear.
“This might look like a listing to protect the polar bear but it’s really just a way for the administration to protect the interests of the oil and gas industry, as well as get away without taking action on global warming.”
PETA participated in a demonstration yesterday in D.C., but we stopped paying attention to the message due to the fact that the group’s tactics are so darn predictable. Putting naked or barely clothed women in cages and/or showers is probably not the best way to get those bigwig lobbyists thinking with their heads.
[Source]
Cute boy Ryan Gosling can officially add animal rights activist to his résumé. The Canadian ex-Mouseketeer recently sent a letter to the the CEO of KFC Canada, John Bitove, asking him to help end the factory farming abuses common in commercial chicken production. The letter was a wonderful gesture, but, unfortunately, Gosling forgot to enclose in it a check for hundreds of millions of dollars, which is what it would take to get these greedy, bloated captains of death to stop what they’re doing. Oh, well!
After the jump, the letter’s text and an abominable video from inside a chicken factory, courtesy of PETA.
CONTINUED »
According to The New York Times, CATholic cat lovers around the world are quite imPURRessed with Pope Benedict XVI’s exceptionALLEY strong aPAWreciation of felines. Apparently the President of the Bible is a well-known cat fancier who often accommodates strays of Rome and who adorns his home with cat figurines. A cat’s even penned a book about the Pope (with the help of a creepy Italian journalist, of course. Cats cant type, silly!).
Indeed, the guy loves him some cats, but at least one papist thinks this affection is indicative of something else: That being that Il Papa is the Lord: ” … I believe it shows that God lives in a person,” says Jan Fredericks of Wayne, NJ, owner of nine cats and, perhaps, yet another vessel of God. Also God: My friend Kristen, who promptly bought three cats when her boyfriend left her.
DOH!(ERTY) “[Pete Doherty] is thousands of pounds in debt. Now he has been evicted from his sprawling nine-bedroom mansion after wrecking the place over the past year. Popping over to check on the place the landlord was horrified to find that his beautiful country pad had become a stinking hovel. The walls, floor and even some of the windows have been daubed with human blood. And we’re told the stench from his abandoned nine cats is so strong it would turn the strongest stomach. After taking one look at the carnage, the landlord cancelled Doherty’s tenancy.”
Editor
