• Say hello to the newest (and most likely fake) member of Facebook: Lindsay Ronson. [DListed]

• Beyonce and Jay-Z's marriage is official. Thank goodness, we were very concerned. [People]

• This should crush the two people who cared: Britney Spears' second How I Met Your Mother appearance is not yet set in stone. [PS]

• Evidently Harry Potter hasn't heard of Craig's List Missed Connections. [ICYDK]

• Eva Mendes didn't feel the need to brush her hair for the Metropolitan Opera opening night. [INO]

• Surprise, surprise: New photos have cropped up of Lindsay Lohan in a drunken coma. [CityRag]

From today's Craig's List "Missed Connections":

Hi!

We were on the RED local line, I got on at 14th Street, you were already on the train. I got off at Columbia University 116th. Around 5PM. It was very crowded and you were behind me. We talked awkardly while you were still behind my back, pushed into each other. I told you I hate being an undergrad, we connected. You eneded up fingering me while no one else was noticing. I didn't get your full e-mail. If you see this, let me know. I hope you do! I miss you.

Hear that, guy? The strange coed you fingerbanged on the subway "misses" you. This means she's crazy. Nice job on the fake e-mail address, now keep your head down for the next three or four years and you should be fine.