
It's a good year to have a fake job. First, all those Bigfoot researchers are getting some airtime. Then Jon Stewart gets fingered as the most trusted man in news. And now "Outstanding Reality Host" is a category at this year's Emmys. Taking this nonsense a step further, the nominees won't just have their names read off a teleprompter — the five contestants nominees will group-host the primetime ceremony. But as we all know in reality show hosting, one day you're in, the next day, you're out. So who's going to show up for the opening of an envelope and hear her own name called?

• We need to print this drunken celebrity collage so we can frame it to hang in the living room. [CityRag]
• The cast of Grey's Anatomy is back to filming. That includes Katherine Heigl, unfortunately. [PS]
• The models who hand out the Emmy Awards will be clothed in Lauren Conrad's line. This has officially gotten out of hand. [INO]
• Two girls kissing has lost its shock value thanks to Madonna and Britney (not to mention drunken college girls), but we give Aubrey O'Day an A for effort. [DListed]
• 50 Cent got his son back with a minimum amount of drama. [ICYDK]
• The Brangelina Wonder Twins were not conceived via in vitro fertilization. Thank goodness that was cleared up. [Yeeeah]
THE EMMYS JUST LOST ALL STREET CRED "The five nominees for top reality show host are not just up for Emmy awards — they're also going to oversee the entire ceremony! American Idol's Ryan Seacrest, Project Runway's Heidi Klum, Dancing with the Stars' Tom Bergeron, Deal or No Deal's Howie Mandel and Survivor's Jeff Probst have all signed on to co-host the Sept. 21 awards show."
Rainn Wilson took over the CNN newsroom to shamelessly plug his new movie, which might be considered annoying if we weren't completely in love with him. The anchor calls Rainn "the guy from The Office" and then questions his credentials. Uh, if anyone is qualified to discuss gales and hail storms, it's Dwight K. Schrute.

Looks like Katherine Heigl might have to take her whining elsewhere, because rumor has it Grey's Anatomy creator Shonda Rhimes is considering killing off Heigl's Izzie Stevens. And not just because the character has become insufferable — Katherine's recent comments about the upcoming Emmys have pissed off the writers and others on the set.
'It's not good there,' a source tells of the Grey's Anatomy set. 'Shonda is pissed. They're thinking of killing her off. They want Izzie dead.'
Congrats, Katherine! Now you can leave that worthless little show and get on with your dreams of becoming the next Jennifer Aniston.
[Source]

We have some good news and bad news with regard to A Shot at Love 2 with Tila Tequila. The good news is that in a SHOCKING!!!! season finale, The Chosen One, Kristy, rejected Tila's offer of a shot at "love." The acting was superb, and we expect an Emmy nomination in the very near future. "It's not just a plastic key," Kristy said. "It's the key to her heart." Wow. Heavy stuff right there.
So on to the bad news: That means there will definitely be A Shot at Love 3 with Tila Tequila. We really needn't say more.
Click through to watch the emotional (yet awesome) footage of Tila getting rejected, ending with her wondering, "What's wrong with me?" Do you really want us to answer that? CONTINUED »

Yes, Tyra Banks was the recipient of an Emmy for Outstanding Talk Show (Informative). To help that little nugget go down, consider this: She was up against Dr. Phil and A Place of Our Own. So, really, it's hard not to win the Emmy in that category. But let's be honest: Anyone who tears a loose thread off a fake Chinatown handbag to floss her teeth and guzzles a bottle of olive oil in front of a live audience is deserving of all the praise in the world. After the jump, one of the groundbreaking moments in daytime television history that won that gold statue for Ty Ty. (And to watch her acceptance speech, click here.) CONTINUED »

A day after Katherine Heigl announced she was pulling her name from the Emmy race because she wasn't "given the material this season to warrant an Emmy nomination," a Grey's Anatomy insider fired back with some choice words of his/her own:
The show bent over backwards to accommodate her film schedule, and then she criticizes the show for lack of material? It's an ungrateful slap in the face to the very writers responsible for her Emmy win in the first place.
We would kill to be a fly on the wall when filming begins for next season.
At right: This is how we picture Katherine — in between shooting scenes for The Ugly Truth — on the set of every project.
[Source]
• Watching local news reporters lose their cool never gets old. [DListed]
• Another reason why we love New York: 53 percent of New Yorkers agree with Governor Paterson's support of same-sex marriages. [QT]
• Lindsay Lohan was spotted with a baby bump. Praise Xenu it's fake. [PS]
• More signs of the apocalypse: Britney Spears is being considered for an Emmy nomination. [INO]
• Randy Jackson thinks Clay Aiken is going to be a great father, but we all know Randy has questionable taste. (See: His obsession with David Archuleta) [ICYDK]

Katherine Heigl — who publicly complained about Knocked Up, the movie that made her a star — will not be repeating her Emmy win from last year because she pulled her name from consideration. Why would she do that, you ask? Because she's an idiot. And she's an even bigger idiot for giving a reason that alienates the Grey's Anatomy writers.
I did not feel that I was given the material this season to warrant an Emmy nomination and in an effort to maintain the integrity of the academy organization, I withdrew my name from contention. In addition, I did not want to potentially take away an opportunity from an actress who was given such materials.
While she does have a point, surely there was a much better way to go about this. Like — going out on a limb here — she could have just kept her mouth shut?
After the jump: A clip of some of that great material. CONTINUED »

Regis Philbin is kind of like Santa Claus in that he's been around forever and everyone loves him. For some reason, his presence got the ladies of The View all riled up to the point where Joy screamed at Barbara as Whoopi walked off the stage. Can Regis have a seat at the View table every day? It's not like he has 19 other TV shows in the works. CONTINUED »

On yesterday's episode of The Tyra Banks Show — titled "How Freaky Are We?" — some crazy guy asked a slew of audience members to stand on him. This went on for a good five minutes before Tyra moved on to other important subjects, such as a woman who wears diapers, pees in them and then has her boyfriend change her.
Just a reminder: This show is nominated for an Emmy.

• Somebody get the host of this show an Emmy! [DListed]
• A gossip magazine is reporting that Katie Holmes is sick and tired of gossip magazines reporting about her. [INO]
• Megan Fox is on the cover of Christopher Amueroso Presents Paw Print, posed with a real fox. Out of frame is the shark that she's jumped. Bye, Megan Fox. [HT]
• Orlando Brown, star of That's So Raven, has gone missing. [ICYDK]
• "Hot men who look like lesbians" [CityRag]
• George Clooney is tired, just like Leatherheads. Zing! [PS]
We thought reality television had reached the pinnacle of its dizzying, doltish heights when that production crew really infected an Amazonian village with the flu, thus killing three children. But we should have known to never underestimate Hollywood, where it seems the only unbreakable law is gravity. Now, rather than simply feeding the zeitgeist poison, the entertainment business will also be awarding those whose efforts best shrivel culture.
A category recognizing "outstanding host for a reality or reality-competition program" was created by the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences and will be presented at the 60th annual Emmys in September.
…
Besides Seacrest of "American Idol," Mandel of "Deal or No Deal" and Banks of "America's Next Top Model," other potential nominees identified by the academy include Ty Pennington of "Extreme Makeover Home Edition," Jeff Foxworthy of "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?" and Tom Bergeron and Samantha Harris of "Dancing With the Stars."
Because where would our country be without Jeff Foxworthy and his show about how American adults are so goshdang stupid?
Today's the big day, y'all: Britney Spears guest stars on tonight's episode of How I Met Your Mother. Prepare for tomorrow's declarations of "She's Back!" and Chris Crocker's inevitable YouTube video campaigning for Brit's Emmy.
Here's a preview of some of tonight's scenes. Judge for yourself.

Last night's piddling Emmys provided background noise for the second smallest audience in the show's recorded history. This means that Perez Hilton is now a bigger draw than an entire auditorium of his subjects. What that means, we do not know, but that shit just don't seem right.

Last evening marked the 59th Annual Emmy Awards (which I've heard were unyieldingly boring). Although they remain one of the least merit-based awards in history, the Emmys are one of the sharpest, and that should count for something.
After the jump, the gowns! Oh, the gowns!
CONTINUED »
Despite all reason, the skit-cum-YouTube sensation "Dick in a Box" was nominated for an Emmy award. Let's hope it loses and is quickly forgotten so that those of us who didn't really see the hilarity in the first place won't once again be subjected to omnipresent, amateur renditions by drunk bar heros with very little imagination.
Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel after the jump. Dick's in the pants.
CONTINUED »



