What We Do Is Secret, a biopic about the now defunct LA punk band The Germs, will finally be released in August after an almost two-year delay. In anticipation of its opening, let us remind you that Secret was funded in part by Rhino Films, whose parent company is the Warner Music Group. This means that WWDIS isn't just not punk, it's the opposite of punk, despite what its advertising would like you to believe.
No, anything that is not "punk" isn't bad – and, indeed, lots of things that are "punk" aren't good (GG Allin, for instance) – but "punk movies" making millionaires even richer is awful. Punk's dead, and flicks like WWDIS are just dancing on its grave.
Click through for the movie trailer followed by some video footage of the real Germs, then try to guess which is which. Hint: The real one is the one in which the lead singer tells everyone in the crowd to hurt each other.
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If you know who GG Allin was, you know that being spat on by a performer at their show isn't nearly as bad as things can get. But GG Allin was a heroin addict with an ax to grind who rubbed his excrement all over himself so that the audience wouldn't feel left out. When Amy Winehouse spits on you and then gets back to drinking and crooning, as she did at a performance in England on Tuesday night, that's when you go, "No, get your ass to rehab, bitch."
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