The problem with the term "beautiful girl" is that girls are rarely, if ever, beautiful. Girls are pretty and girls are cute — and that's fine because there's a time and place for cute (the age 16 and prom, respectively) — but they're not beautiful. Women are beautiful. Women are sexy.
We're reminded of how many people ignore that important distinction around this time every year: the lad mag "Hot List" season, when Maxim et al group together the names of every sad, drunk, Botoxed, sutured, bleached, commodified and infected girl in Hollywood and try to pretend the resultant stable has sex appeal. We're sick of it, so we've compiled our own lineup of truly beautiful women. Feel free to suggest additions or complain.
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Scarlett Johansson wasted no time in debuting her engagement ring from fiancé Ryan Reynolds at last night's Costume Institute Gala at NYC's Metropolitan Museum of Art. Pretty much every celebrity you can imagine was in attendance (except for Reynolds), and 95 percent of the wardrobe choices made our heart cry.
Click through for more pictures than you could have ever asked for. CONTINUED »
Alas, despite reports to the contrary, Jennifer Lopez's upcoming "reality program" is not a reality program at all, according to People magazine.
Instead, the show, airing on TLC, is going to be a very elaborate commercial for Lopez's upcoming fragrance. People shut off from the world enough to tune should not expect to get a glimpse into Lopez's life as a married mother of new twins, but rather to learn about the intricacies of "the creation, production and eventual launch" of a branded perfume. It's marketing and consumerism pawned off as entertainment and, unfortunately, it's reality.
At right is Latarian Milton, a seven-year-old boy from South Florida who was in hot water recently after stealing his grandmother's Dodge Durango and joyriding around town with a friend of his, also seven. Milton drove through a Costco parking lot and up and down some main roads before crashing into a sign on the sign of the road, in the process running over a couple mailboxes and hitting several parked and moving cars. Nobody was hurt and Milton is now the talk of his small town.
When a local newsman asked Milton why he took the car, our new hero proclaimed, "I wanted to do it because it's fun—it's fun to do bad things … I wanted to do hoodrat stuff with my friend."
After hearing about the $10,000 bassinets and cashmere onesies lavished onto JLo and Posh Spice's velvet-bottomed brats, it's nice to know there's still some real badass kids in the world evening things out.
Video after the jump.
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BECAUSE WHAT AMERICA NEEDS IS ANOTHER REALITY SHOW "Jennifer Lopez is about to open her personal life for a new television series on TLC, the cable channel announced Wednesday. The singer and new mom to twins will co-executive produce, co-create and star in the 'docu-series,' which focuses on how Lopez juggles her career — including launching a new fragrance — with motherhood."
MANY THINGS WRONG "Jennifer Lopez wants to Tom Cruise to be godfather to her newborn twins. The ‘Jenny From The Block’ singer — who gave birth to son Max and daughter Emme on February 22 — has convinced husband Marc Anthony to give Tom the role despite their differences in religious beliefs. Tom, a devout follower of the mysterious religion of Scientology; Lopez and Anthony Catholic. … Tom … has already showered the twins with gifts. The actor reportedly spent around $200,000 on designer christening outfits for Max and Emme … "
Mariah Carey, who is currently in the UK promoting her new album, has been known to be quite the diva when it comes to making demands.
• This week during her trip overseas, Mariah rented out all the penthouses in her London hotel to ensure her absolute privacy.
• In 2005, she had her assistants prepare for her arrival at a London hotel by rolling out a red carpet lined with white candles. During the wait, she was driven around in her limo.
• After accepting a role in the upcoming independing film Tennessee, she was told budget constraints required her to travel to the set on an economy-class ticket. She happily obliged and then purchased every economy seat on the flight so she could travel alone in the cabin. CONTINUED »
Jennifer Lopez and dusty husband Marc Anthony got a $6 million payday when they gave People magazine exclusive photo rights to their new twins. It was an absurd amount of money paid to absurd people for an absurd reason, and guess what: it's already being absurdly spent.
Lopez is now the proud, shameful owner of $2.6 million earrings, which, if you don't know, are just tiny things that dangle off the wearer's earlobes. This is our world.
Jennifer Lopez debuted her post-babies body this weekend at New York's Shine A Light premiere, but from the looks of things, she should have stayed home with the twins. Those babies have no hope of a normal life so long as they're being raised by Skeletor and whatever alien J.Lo is striving to be.
[Source]
The Kardashians took some time off from spamming our comments section to speak to Larry King, because we're sure his audience would love their show. Larry can barely hide his hatred for the famewhoring family as he stumbles over what's written on his cue cards and tries to figure out the appeal of these horrid people. Oh, and Kim is described as the one who "posed for Playboy," presumably because "has a butt that rivals J.Lo's" and "made a sex tape" were too inappropriate for CNN.
• Mollygood Editor Cord (seen here as an adorable youngin') wants to know if he's black enough for you. [SH]
• Kids are so cute: Madonna's daughter wants to save Britney Spears. Nobody spoil it and tell her it's impossible. [Us]
• Hulk Hogan's new girlfriend looks just like daughter Brooke. Surprised? [INO]
• Jennifer Lopez's nursery may kill her babies. Also a danger to the kids: Skeletor. [Jossip]
• Anyone hoping to buy Jamie Lynn Spears a baby gift, stalk away. [People]
• Sorry, Internet pedophiles: Miley Cyrus is not looking for a boyfriend online. [ICYDK]
We’re hearing People’s J. Lo twins issue moved between two and three million copies at the newsstand, according to multiple scan data sources. (Distributor AMI says 3m; supermarket data say 2m.)
But how does that compare to Nicole and Christina's issues?
Jennifer Lopez and her twins grace the cover of tomorrow's People magazine, for all the fans who have been dying to catch a glimpse of the bald little wonders.
After Christina and Nicole's spreads, we still can't find the urge to care. All those celebrity babies start to look the same after a while.
Halle Berry should pop any day now, but until then, she should be prancing around the city in stilettos and designer dresses. Has J.Lo taught us nothing?
[Source]
J.NO "Not only has Jennifer Lopez sold her baby pics to People mag for a cool $6 mil — she got the mag to agree to stop calling her J.Lo! … We're also told J.Lo instructed People, in addition to the loot and the name thing, that her hubby, Annie Leibovitz wannabe Marc Anthony, has to be the one to shoot the photos."
• Wow! JLo's kids really do share names with a couple characters on an animated show about magical dragons. We thought that was just a joke, but we guess it still kind of is. [Yeeeah]
• In case you were wondering, nowadays, Mickey Rourke looks like a melted woman. [DListed]
• What does Kristin Cavallari even do anymore besides add pictures to her Facespace? [HT]
• "Rachel Bilson Is Pregnant" [INO]
• Mamma Mia, indeed, young lady! [ICYDK]
• Matt Dillon totes hates kids, too! Especially "celebrity photographer" ones. [CityRag]
• The New York Times ran an entire article about how being at some form of a computer 24/7 might not be healthy. Thanks, Times. We can always count on you to make common sense seem difficult and unheard of. [NYT]
Assy new mother of twins Jennifer Lopez has opened a tremendously presumptuous gift registry at baby boutique Petit Tresor.
Among her most stupid – and most expensive – desires: Two cashmere cardigan, hat and bootie pants sets ($279 each); two Chelsea Sleigh cribs ($1390 each); and an Italian leather and snake skin trim Mia Bossi diaper bag ($1250).
Once Lopez' wish list is fulfilled, her entitled, velvet-palmed brats will come free of charge.
IT'S ABOUT TIME "It's double the baby joy for Jennifer Lopez and husband Marc Anthony: They're the proud new parents of twins, a boy and a girl. … The babies were born at 12:45 a.m. ET on Friday in Long Island, N.Y., says her rep, Simon Fields."
Editor
