• Check out Kobe throwing a towel in that woman’s face! Humiliating and hilarious. [DListed]

• Apparently, Ashton Kutcher still “acts.” Who knew? [PS]

• Carmen Electra doing what she does: sitting, smiling and exposing. [HT]

• Who is keeping Ghost Whisperer on the air, and is Ghost Whisperer their only friend? [INO]

• “Mary Kate Olsen’s Awful Plastic Surgery” [CityRag]

• Carrie Bradshaw was a total copycat! [ICYDK]

• “Big Butts En Vogue in Ivory Coast” [SH]

• Angelina Jolie is in Iraq! No, not fighting. [Jossip]

• Aretha Franklin’s R-E-S-P-E-C-T-I-N-G her body with a new fitness program. [DListed]

• Vince Vaughn takes some time off of drinking, smoking and whoring to work. God bless him. [PS]

• Lindsay Lohan says “fuck you.” [HT]

• Javier Bardem went crazy because of a weird haircut. Maybe he’s not as cool as we thought he was. [ICYDK]

• Jennifer Love Hewitt’s fiancé doesn’t care if you think she’s fat. [INO]

• “Shiloh Jolie-Pitt Kidnapping Scare” [Yeeeah]

• Street art. Enjoy. [CityRag]

Don’t ever, ever, ever make this face while doing charity work with the homeless. Even if you aren’t saying, “This hobo is stinky and unpleasant,” it looks like you are, and nobody wants grilled chicken from a judgmental jerk.

[Source]

• More from everyone’s favorite old codger, Pat Robertson. This time on the West Coast’s “gay agenda.” [Queerty]

• Possibly maybe. [DListed]

• Where were you when Britney shaved her head? It’s like our generation’s Kennedy assassination. [PS]

• Moratorium on “baby bump” in ‘08, kay? [INO]

• Guy Ritchie’s new flick bombs. And this one doesn’t even star his wife. [ICYDK]

• The toys of Whoville! [CityRag]

• Jennifer Love Hewitt is not doing Playboy.

• HA! Why are losers who take their jewelry seriously always the ones who want the most respect? [SH]

• Best rumor of the day. [DListed]

• Remember when the black guy called the gay guy the f-word and everyone was all, “Fire him!”? Barely, right? Well, that was this year. [PS]

• This moron! [HT]

• Not fat, pregnant. [ICYDK]

• Another purse that looks like many purses before it. Wow! [INO]

• Madonna raises her children to be healthy and not materialistic. Let her have it with your contempt! [Yeeeah]

• Santa is scary. [CityRag]

The Today Show this morning invited on Janice Dickinson, the self-proclaimed “world’s first supermodel,” to speak about the controversial Jennifer Love Hewitt photos currently sweeping the Internet.

Dickinson defended Hewitt, whom, upon the release of the pictures, many branded as fat, calling her “healthy.” “You want to see someone who’s fat,” she said, “Tyra Banks is fat.” Ha!

This could get bad (good?).

• Sorry, iTunes hasn’t yet picked up this track, but feel free replay this song to your hateful heart’s content. [Queerty]

• Movie stars are now doing what our government won’t. What a wonderful world. [Source]

• Keanu Reeves keeping up that stellar Point Break physique. [PS]

• With luck, she’ll pump her lips so full of garbage she won’t be able to move them. [HT]

• Kate Moss en Mexico. No es muy interesante. [ICYDK]

• Scott Weiland’s back on the sauce. [ICYDK]

• Jennifer Love Hewitt: “A size 2 is not fat!” True! [Yeeeah]

• Moms! Am I right? [Queerty]

• Owen Wilson moves on, but not to worry, scorned woman: We hear he’s a bit unstable. [DListed]

• Mollygood editor Cord Jefferson profiled the Wu-Tang Clan for the latest issue of Filter magazine. Pick it up if the samurai poets changed your life, too. If you’re not into them, shame, but you can read the David Byrne interview. [Filter]

• Daisy Fuentes? Is it 1994? [CityRag]

• Anna Wintour? [PS]

• Jennifer Love Hewitt is a real woman and people are angry about it! [HT]

• Dancing With the Stars victor tastes real fame and immediately dumps his fianceé. [ICYDK]

• Pushing Mad Weight and the City. [INO]

• Here, Joe Simpson comes very close to pimping his daughter. [Yeeeah]

• Too beautiful to be a nanny? [ICYDK]

• Odds are these guys live about 30 seconds from my old apartment in LA. Viva New York City! [Defamer]

• Jennifer Love Hewitt cries when watching herself because she’s so moved. No shit, she actually said that. Seriously. [DListed]

• Fergie’s high-waist (waste?). [HT]

• Kevin Federline is going to be on television for something other than a lawsuit. It’s a step. [Yeeeah]

• Match the celebrities to their living accessories. [CityRag]

Unsurprising: Jennifer Love Hewitt now does bra commercials.

Surprising: Ghost Whisperer is still on the air.

More after this jump.

CONTINUED »

• What are you guys, fucking Wilson from Home Improvement? [ONTD]

• It’s gross, but keep in mind that it could have been much grosser. [DListed]

• I can’t resist a Vada Sultenfuss reference. [BWE]

• Want an iPod signed by Britney Spears? No? Just think of it as a slightly damaged iPod, then. Now you want it. [INO]

• Love Hewitt shilling for Hanes. [ICYDK]

• How does someone with such an easy target of a name (Nick La-gay, Dick Lachey, Dick La-gay) not learn how to verbally defend themselves in 6th grade? [Jossip]

• That’s an interesting outfit. I’m sorry you spilled steak grease all over it. [ICYDK]

• Clooney being kind in public. [DListed]

• I guess those fuckers from The Hills really are fuckers. On camera, even! Look for the phrase “overly large girly bits.” Flattering! [TheBosh]

• Drew Barrymore signed on to produce “He’s Just Not That Into You.” Gag me with a bullshit book. [PopSugar]

• Angelina Jolie will be in the Sin City prequel, clearly taking time out for the kids. [Glitterati]

• For Tarantino, it’s the little things, like the way she says “cocksucker.” [Jossip]

• Who coulda guessed that Toluca Lake wouldn’t take kindly to the Three Six Mafia moving in? [ASL]

• The winner of “Most Creative” in the YouTube awards. It’s brilliant, but let’s not forget that it owes a lot to a very worthy predecessor. [People]

• A male singer wanted Sean Stewart’s body. I guess he thought he was sexy and he wanted to let him know. [Queerty]

• A perfectly reasonable 50 foot robot request from the always pragmatic Michael Jackson. [DListed]

• If you can see the PIN number you’ll have access to literally hundreds of dollars from the Party of Five fortune. [IDLYITW]

• It’s better for to be humping Blunts than smoking them. Whatever it takes, Linds. [HR]

• Fake boobs, real princess. [HT]

• In some cultures, being locked in a Victoria’s Secret with Britney Spears for all eternity is hell. [Defamer]

• Bonnie and Bonnie arrested on charges of giggling while robbing. [DListed]

• Piven getting some self-respect back by ditching that bad toupee. [CityRag]

• Hewitt’s only comfortable emphasizing her breasts in the safe confines of a tasteful…bra commercial? [Egotastic]

• Rehab works if you go for more than 24 hours. [Glitterati]

• Even I thought I was kidding when I said Victoria had dyed her hair to look more LA. Turns out that’s exactly what she did, making the joke boat take a turn into the sea of sadness. [INO]

• Jolie-Pitt clan’s getting a kid from Vietnam. This will be their first adopted child to have American lineage. [Jossip]

• Nicole Kidman learning castration techniques for her new film. She said she had plenty of practice being married to Tom Cruise. [ICYDK]

• A woman arguing against women’s sexual revolutions. [NYT]

• Jennifer Love Hewitt refuses to show her party of two. [Popoholic]

• Eddie Murphy’s not a sore loser; he’s just a family man. [SOMG]

• Olsens in Paris. [DS]

• “Victoria Beckham’s reality” is oxymoronic. [Jossip]

• Mark Wahlberg uncomfortable with simulating gay sex in Brokeback, fine with simulating straight sex and huge penis in Boogie Nights. [ICYDK]

• What do Ben Affleck and Bruce Willis have in common? That’s right: high-class whores. [TC]

• Friends have “studied” the lewd pics of the Idol contestant and swear it’s not her. How do they know? “She’s never had (acrylic nail) tips” like the ones in the photo. Go, Jersey: distinguishing friends not by face, but by fingernails! [Glitterati]

• Jennifer Love Hewitt found a costume to hide those youknowwhats she’s been youknowwhating. [Celebitchy]

• Is Angelina pregnant? Probably not! But she did wear a scarf! So there’s really no difference! [DListed]

• Ashlee Simpson is sure glad someone saved her seat at Hyde for those weeks she was in London. [I’m Not Obsessed]

• Diddy is looking to retire, at least until he comes up with an original new variation on that pesky name. [A Socialite’s Life]

• PETA and Rachel Zoe should fight more. Just a thought. [X17]

• Aw, I don’t know what the big deal is about, Jared Leto is clearly just trying to give Elijah some eyeliner tips. [CityRag]

• Not such a good sign when Borat’s biggest fans are sick of Borat’s face by the end of Borat. [BWE]

I’m not saying I couldn’t get my hands on a plaid short shorts onesie and a couple of pom poms in one week, but I certainly can’t do Jennifer Love Hewitt caliber kicks.

• How Not To Dress Up Your Best Assets, by Jennifer Love Hewitt. [Bastardly]

• Hef doesn’t like to bump uglies (or shall we say olds) anymore. Ambitious blondes everywhere rejoice. [I’m Not Obsessed]

• Janet Jackson was pissed that Paris co-opted her album release party. That’s what you get for letting the Hilton siege into the club. [Rymes with Snitch]

• Gwyneth Paltrow eats like an idiot to lose baby weight. Apparently the Guiness diet wasn’t working out. [Celebitchy]

• Sarah Michelle Gellar appreciates being able to make faces. What, it’s not like that’s an important part of her craft or anything. [PopSugar]

• Hey, you’re not a lifeguard. [Egotastic]

• What’s with the Brits and their autobiographies? [DListed]

• Help MetaDish end this Stephanie Adams mess once and for all. [MetaDish]