• I know people say things like this every election year, but – no shit – if Fred Thompson wins the presidency and America's First Lady has breast implants, I'm getting the hell outta here. [Jossip]

• I'm sure David Letterman is upset about his Paris Hilton-free future. Broken hearted, even. [DListed]

• Literally two seconds ago someone in the office told me this girl might be what we in the know call a "beard." I dunno about that, but do with it what you will. [Yeeeah]

• Bam Margera finally speaks up about his relationship with Jessica Simpson, and just as his career is on a decline. Imagine that. [ICYDK]

• Cash back. [INO]

• Why isn't this girl part of the Heidi and LC and Spencer and Sleepy and Shitty and Whitey feud? [HT]

• Brooklyn wins! Enjoy your Manhattan megamall, yuppies! [CityRag]