For the last few idiots left who look to Lynne Spears for parenting advice, consider this: The woman just leaked some of the "shocking" revelations from her new tell-all disguised as a celebrity parenting how-to in an effort to garner some publicity. The revelations include stories about Britney's sex life and drug and alcohol abuse, which would be surprising if the wise Road Kill Willie hadn't already spilled the beans.
Apparently Lynne claims that Britney began drinking alcohol at the age of 13, when she joined the Mickey Mouse Club. By 14, she had lost her virginity to an 18-year-old football player from her hometown, and by 15 she was taking drugs. Lynne details "the horror when Britney, just 16, was caught with cocaine and cannabis on a private jet." While Brit was the same age, Lynne allowed her to sleep with then-boyfriend Justin Timberlake because "Lynne thought Britney was in love and Justin was good for her."
So lessons learned? Lynne says she "regrets handing over control of Britney’s career to managers and allowing her daughter to be promoted as a sex object in raunchy videos at such a young age," which is basically saying, "I'm sorry those other people screwed up." Sounds like Mother of the Year to us.
[Source]
I don't watch Dancing With the Stars but it's looking like I'll have to this season, thanks to the participation of my former boyfriend, Lance Bass. The official cast was announced today, and it also includes Kim Kardashian, Jeffrey Ross, Cloris Leachman and Susan Lucci.
But enough about the D-listers: Lance has officially been on America's radar for 10 years thanks to *NSYNC's July 1998 Disney special. At right is a clip from the show that made me fall in love. Who knew 10 years later Justin would date and dump Britney Spears, Joey would appear on DWTS and host a karaoke show, JC would judge some dance crew competition, and Chris would completely fall off the planet. Congrats, Lance: You're following the path of all great boy band has-beens.
• Eva Mendes flashes everyone for half a second in her new Calvin Klein commercial. Predictably, the world is going nuts. (Slightly NSFW) [ICYDK]
• Terrible idea of the day: Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are planning to get married. Oh, and it's going to coincide with her album release, of course. [INO]
• Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal will not be getting married this winter. Why anybody cares is beyond us. [PS]
• More proof of the end of days: Justin Timberlake might host the Oscars. [DListed]
• Balthazar Getty finally wised up and dumped Sienna Miller. [Yeeeah]
• Just what we've always wanted: A gallery of Chris Brown's tattoos. [CityRag]
In its coverage of last night's Teen Choice Awards, E! Online calls Justin Timberlake "hunky." Question: Is that accurate? We thought "hunky" was reserved for guys like Vin Diesel and Harrison Ford. Isn't Justin Timberlake more like a cute hall monitor?
Justin Timberlake insists he doesn't think of himself as a fashion icon, but does feel the need to take responsibility for one of the most annoying trends of all time:
It's funny, I keep hearing Ashton Kutcher say how he was responsible for trucker caps. [My best friend and I] were wearing them when we were seventeen.
We don't think that was all you, Justin, but you did bring back the d-bag trend. You'll always have that.
Early this morning when I couldn't sleep, I turned on the TV and watched the entirety of West Side Story, which I hadn't seen in about eight years. Wow. How frickin' amazing is that thing? And now I'm scared, because it's only a matter of time before some executive getting fat on the Remake Era rediscovers it. Can't you just see it? Christina Aguilera as Maria and Justin Timberlake as Tony. Blech. I'll stop there before I unwittingly spell out the original's downfall.
Madonna has some sort of obsession with the rear ends of Hollywood's finest, having first given a B12 shot to Justin Timberlake's behind and then following suit with Gerard Butler. Our future husband said he was sick on the set of a Guy Ritchie film when Madonna decided to play nurse:
Well, she was amazing. She just said, 'Drop your pants.' I stood there with my little bottom out, and she gave me a shot in the bum! … It didn't work at all — I got more sick! But I appreciated the effort.
We have to hand it to Madonna: The whole B12 shot thing is pretty ingenious. Hope she doesn't mind if we steal it.
[Source]
THIS CAN ONLY END BADLY "[OK! magazine] can exclusively confirm that Justin Timberlake is recording a duet with Britney for her upcoming studio album."
The pained expression you see at left is Eli Manning's best attempt at a smile during Justin Timberlake's EPSY Awards opening monologue. We couldn't sit through the eight minutes of footage because Justin was just so painful to watch — like a small child trying to keep the attention while all the adults just sit around and ignore him in hopes he will go away. Unfortunately, Justin and his ego stuck around throughout the show.
Click through for the clip and let us know how long you were able to sit through that mess. CONTINUED »
Four years after Janet Jackson’s infamous Super Bowl “wardrobe malfunction,” a federal appeals court ruled that the Federal Communications Commission “acted arbitrarily and capriciously” in issuing a $550,000 indecency fine to CBS. That's kind of an understatement.
Try as she may, Britney Spears just can't drum up much excitement about her new album that's in the works, even when she starts singing songs called "ATM." The lyrics to that fine song are as follows: "Hey Mama, I know it’s my cash you seek. … You know they treat me like an ATM, but y'all know that I’m too good for 'em."
Taking her frustrations out on her mother? Nothing new. What is new, however, is her claim in another song, "Already Bad," which contains a confession for Justin Timberlake: "I know you thought you were the first, but I had already quenched my thirst, I was already bad." Unfortunately for Britney, this would have been shocking had it been the year 2003. Now, after witnessing the head-shaving incident and Brit being carted away in an ambulance, that's nothing.
[Source]
The most annoying thing by far about last night's ESPY Awards was Justin Timberlake, who hosted the event. We're sure he did a great job, but, judging from these pictures, he still seems to think he's a lot cuter than he really is.
[Source]
• Pam Anderson appeared on Big Brother in Australia because evidently "we don't have it in America." Except … we do. [DListed]
• Will Smith and Jada tell each other ahead of time if they want to have sex with other people. Ooookay. [INO]
• Jessica Biel doesn't really care about marrying Justin Timberlake. That's good, because neither do we. [PS]
• If the world needs one thing, it's more wax statues of Miley Cyrus. [ICYDK]
• Amy Winehouse reportedly flashed her husband, Blake Incarcerated, while visiting him in prison. Blake then requested a longer sentence. [Yeeeah]
• Lauren Conrad almost has a Britney/Paris/Lindsay moment. [HT]
• A reason to love New York City's subway system. [CityRag]
• Amy Winehouse punched someone for the third time in less than two weeks. At this point, it's just humorous. [Yeeeah]
• Why is Jessica Alba sucking up to Justin Timberlake? [INO]
• More proof Steve Carell is a good guy. [PS]
• Denise Richards' neighbors are trying to force her out due to the media circus brought about by her reality show. Also, because she's a miserable shrew. [ICYDK]
• Always wanted to see Brigitte Nielsen get plastic surgery? No? Well, too bad. [DListed]
• Tim McGraw shows his wife she's not the only one who can get into a fight with an audience member who is being disrespectful. [INO]
• Brooke Hogan explains the controversial photo in which her father rubs lotion on her butt: "I know I’m a grown woman, but it’s like he’s touching an old car." [ICYDK]
• Justin Timberlake says he suffers from OCD and ADD. Also, D-Bag Syndrome. [DListed]
• Take the celebrity honeymoon quiz and see how much of a life you don't have. [PS]
• MTV, likely energized by John McCain's campaign, has decided to allow political ads for the first time since 1981. [Jossip]
This one's out of left field: The Love Guru, Mike Myers' most culturally insensitive project yet – one scene features the guru scratching himself like a dog while practicing this crazy thing called yoga – is bad. And not just fancy critics like AO Scott are saying as much. Even kiddie paper USA Today has few kind words for the film:
The Love Guru (* * out of four) is enraptured by bathroom humor that doesn't even reach sophomoric standards. It's more on the level of preschool.
This send-up of feel-good, inspirational wisdom with a decidedly Indian flavor might have made a clever Saturday Night Live sketch. But as a movie, it's a silly spoof that is occasionally funny but grows tedious with excessive mugging and bad punning.
And now we know why Justin Timberlake was so crabby while doing press for this flick.
Trailer after the jump. Betcha can't sit through the whole thing.
CONTINUED »
• Gerard Butler is searching for his "dream girl" who he says disappeared during a date a few years ago. OK, fine. It was me. [ICYDK]
• Rich people have problems, too: Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel fight over refrigerator space. [INO]
• Blake Lively's puppy is not above peeing on her owner, now matter how famous she may be. [PS]
• Janet Jackson manages to look both comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time. [SH]
• Mario Lopez on Eva Longoria: "We never dated. Unfortunately. We met a long time ago, and she was always with somebody or I was with somebody." Not like that's stopped him before. [DListed]
[Source]
Editor
