Sorry, playgirls and gay boys, after 35 years of nude dudes, Playgirl magazine is shuttering its print publication. According to an e-mail editor-in-chief Nicole Caldwell sent to the media, "Playgirl is going all-Web. The last print issue will be the Jan/Feb 2009 magazine, which comes out Nov. 18."
After the jump, a (Wikipedia-assisted) list of all the famous men who appeared either nude or semi-nude in Playgirl's pages over the years.
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The legal team defending R Kelly, aka Jack the Pisser, in his Chicago kiddie porn trial rested their case yesterday after just two days of testimony, meaning jurors could be in deliberation as early as Thursday.
According to reports out of Illinois, Kelly's defense was nowhere near as tight as his cornrows:
It was not the defense courthouse observers expected in the high-profile proceeding. There were no surprise witnesses, no gotcha moments, no explanation of how the raunchy video came into existence. During opening statements and the prosecution's case, the defense offered many theories that it didn't follow up.
If Kelly, the libido behind "Hump Bounce" and "Freak Dat Body," is convicted, he faces up to 15 hard years in prison. But don't get too excited just yet. As one legal analyst who spoke to the Chicago Tribune is quick to note: "Celebrities are tough to convict, particularly in their hometown."
The jurors in R. Kelly’s child pornography trial had the distinct displeasure of watching the sex tape that allegedly depicts R. Kelly having sex and urinating on a girl who could have been as young as 13. According to reports, Kelly “watched the video with a studied stare.” Maybe he was trying to act like he hadn’t seen it plenty of times when it was part of his personal video library.
Ashley Alexandra Dupré, aka Ashley Youmans, the ambitious young escort who became an instant celebrity after getting caught servicing ex-governor Eliot Spitzer, is being offered $1 million to drop a $10 million lawsuit she's brought against Girls Gone Wild. Dupré is suing the bastards for allegedly plying her with alcohol, "tricking" her into getting naked on camera and then — without her consent — using that footage in a video.
Joe Francis, head asshole at Girls Gone Wild, says Dupré has "zero chance" of winning the lawsuit, as he has "videotape of her giving consent, while showing her identification." Francis recommends Dupré take the million and walk: "She should keep in mind, it's considerably more than the Governor of New York paid her, and our activities aren't illegal," he told the New York Daily News. Oh, man, we hate that guy.
More than ever before, we are hoping and wishing for a hell in which guys like Joe Francis get the shit beaten from them hour after hour by Amazonian superbitches with real boobs and big fists.
We call bullshit on the Jimi Hendrix sex tape. Though the man in the movie does bear a resemblance to Hendrix, it's not uncanny (where are the acne scars?) and before jumping to conclusions it would serve people well to remember that porn has a long history of adapting things to fit its purposes. Duh: Throbbin' Hood?
GIRLS GONE LITIGIOUS "The call girl linked to the downfall of former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer sued the founder of the 'Girls Gone Wild' series on Monday for $10 million, claiming he exploited her image and name to advertise the racy videos. Ashley Alexandra Dupre, 22, contended in the lawsuit that she was only 17 — too young to sign legally binding contracts — and drunk on spring break in 2003 when she agreed to be filmed for 'Girls Gone Wild' in Miami Beach."
Oily little man Brett Ratner is in talks to direct the remake of The Incredible Shrinking Man. Eddie Murphy is set to star in the film, which, again, will not be pornographic despite a premise that completely lends itself to the genre.
COITUS INTERRUPTUS "Jenna Jameson admitted that she's had 'a bit of rocky year' during the Adult Video News Awards on Saturday, but stunned everyone by saying that she's done with porn for good."
• LOL, indeed. [PITNB]
• No more masculine musicals! They're oxymoronic and moronic. [DListed]
• Cigarettes and jet skis would be a good name for an electroclash band if anyone listened to electroclash anymore. [PS]
• It's time for the porn awards; also know as the Oscars for Victims of Sexual Abuse. [HT]
• Mischa Barton makes history and takes responsibility for her actions. [INO]
• YIKES: "Pregnant Jamie Lynn Spears has been dumped by boyfriend Casey Aldridge because he doubts he is the father…" [ICYDK]
• Madonna's bottled water is even more stupid than everyone else's bottled water. [Yeeeah]
• Vinyl records are exactly 87 percent cooler than MP3s. [CityRag]
Gay gay porn king Michael Lucas has invited Hills flotsam Spencer Pratt to be a star in one of his films. Here's Lucas' publicity stunt in his own words:
He was born to be in a gay-porn blockbuster. Lucas Entertainment would do anything to be able to center our next major all-male production on Spencer Pratt.
Trust me - I’ll know how to show viewers the parts of Spencer Pratt they most want to see.
He'll know how to show us Spencer's sense of decency? We thought Michael Lucas was in the cock game.
In an effort to bolster the ever-assailed decorum of the Internet, Mollygood looks to poetry with Someone Haiku. Each day – using 17 syllables or less – you’re given the opportunity to wax poetic about some piece of flotsam or jetsam that’s washed up on the shores of Mollygood. Hopefully this Zen practice will not only bathe you in self-discovery, but also bring a touch of Eastern class to a global network of information that’s devolved into nothing more than tit websites and provocative MySpace pictures.
Today's Someone Haiku winner is LisaNo.1:
Engorged member plus
Brain oxygen deficit,
Equals awkwardness.
Very nicely done there.
New one after the jump.
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• And it gets laughably worse! [DListed]
• How about when celebrities tell the media they hate media. We hate that. [PS]
• FHM is not going to the grave without a fight, we'll give them that. [HT]
• A full rundown of the spending habits of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline. Enjoy? Please try not to, actually. [INO]
• Paris Hilton goes into a tizzy in a pornography shop. Heiress-like! [ICYDK]
• Do the Europeans like Avril Lavigne so much because she makes North America looks so damn bad? Or is it less insidious and they just have bad taste? [Yeeeah]
• Katie Holmes is running the New York marathon, presumably to test her endurance for when she must steal her baby away into the night. [EBG]
Just from seeing pictures like this, we can tell, scent unsmelled, that Dave Navarro wears too much cologne. Likewise, we always knew that one day he would become a pornographer and have some ridiculous reason for doing so.
…the former Red Hot Chili Peppers and Jane's Addiction star, who now writes and directs XXX videos, says: "Rock and porn exist to break taboos. Rock used to have that rebellious 'up against the world' creed . . . That doesn't exist anymore in the music world - but it's alive and well in the adult industry." He adds: "It's heartening to feel kin to a group of freewheeling individuals who don't give a shit about approval."
Nice try, doofus, but you videotape people fucking. Shut up.
[Source]
Joe Francis, upon being vindicated of charges that his company manipulated drunken women into exposing themselves: "This is yet another example of false allegations that I have faced. I am tired of these lies being used against me in an attempt to extort money from me and destroy my name." Because in a world of bared tits and drunken whoring, a man's good name means everything to him.
• At least his dignity is so meaningless to him that he'll keep the eyebrow sham going 'til he's dead; one has to respect that pathetic fortitude. (Is he dead?) [DListed]
• This many photos while they grocery shop? Wow. [DS]
• God does listen: American Gladiators is returning! [ICYDK]
• Some new bag of boobs has already disrobed and is ready to take Jenna Jameson's place. [HT]
• Stunning lyricism. Really. Why is the radio still around? [Yeeeah]
• Siegfried & Roy finally come out of the closet that was already opened for them years ago by their mustaches, clothes, demeanors, countenances and voices. [CityRag]
Jennifer "Toastee" Toof, whose early career in pornography led to her dismissal from VH1's Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School, is now looking forward to the release of her Vivid video, Toastee Exposed.
…Vivid Entertainment is ready to release a 40-minute tape in which Toastee appears to give pleasure to an unidentified man. Vivid co-chairman Steven Hirsch hails Toastee as a "talented contortionist" whose "enthusiasm for sex is obvious." Phoenix-based agent David Hans Schmidt, who brokered the deal, tells us: "She may not have made the grade on VH1's 'Charm School,' but she gets straight A's on this tape."
Editor
