WEDDED BLISS Ellen DeGeneres on new bride Portia de Rossi: "She's officially off the market. No one else gets her. And now she'll cook and clean for me."
L-words Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi were wed this weekend at their home in Los Angeles. Because every celebrity is equally unworthy of privacy in the eyes of money hungry paparazzi, there's some sneaky photos of the nuptials after the jump.
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HERE COME THE BRIDES "Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi, 35, will wed this weekend in California. … The pair are planning a small, intimate ceremony with only a few close friends and family."
Noted Hollywood star and heterosexual Will Smith appeared on Ellen DeGeneres’ television show on Monday to discuss – as Ellen is wont to do following some little California court ruling – marriage. Ellen, as you might have heard, plans to marry girlfriend Portia de Rossi, and so that is all she can think about, even if her writers might have put other talking points on her cue cards. So how has Smith, who is married to heavy metal singer Jada Pinkett, kept his marriage going strong for 10 years?
In light of the California Supreme Court decision to overturn the ban on gay marriage, Ellen DeGeneres — lesbian, host, friend — announced during a taping of her show yesterday that she will marry longtime partner Portia de Rossi, who was in the audience at the time. At the revelation, the audience rose to give DeGeneres and de Rossi a standing ovation. (We started tearing up while writing this; it's so damn overdue and cute.)
If you're a fan of powergay Ellen DeGeneres, we've good news and bad news: The good news is that her recent emotional meltdowns may not be solely puppy-related; the bad news is that she might have been crying because her much less powerful gay girlfriend is preparing to go the way of so many baby dogs before her and fly the coop.
According to multiple sources, [Ellen’s] really in pain because her three-year romance with actress Portia de Rossi is all but over.
“Ellen would never have broken down like that on TV if things were right in her home life,” one source tells Star.
Portia has been telling Ellen she’s very unhappy at home,” says a second source….”When it comes down to it, she wants to be with someone younger ad hotter. She wants out, but Ellen has been begging her to stay. Portia is really everything in this world to her.”
All the puppies in the world won't be able to fill this void. What a disastrous blow. Anticipate many a tear stained pantsuit in the DeGeneres home.
[Source]
Almost everything in the whole wide world is more scintillating than this emotion-numbing video of Ellen Degeneres, Portia de Rossi and some precocious tween bitching about that goddamn dog. But one thing to note is that this video was taken sans tears right after the dog was napped. So what was the impetus for Ellen's breathless weeping on television the next day. Delayed reaction, no?
Oh, and we are in agreement that, if the death threats made on her behalf work out and she gets the dog back, that girl's going to have a frighteningly enormous sense of entitlement, right?
From Joan Rivers' not-at-all-tiresome Emmys liveblog:
Sally Field said that If Mothers ruled the world, there would be no goddamned war. Tell that to Eleanor Roosevelt, that old dyke, and Mary Todd Lincoln, that crazy old dyke!
Oh, Joan! Is your frontal lobe now also in your lips?
More crazy, young "dykes" under here.
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• I say it's the glasses. They're crazy flattering. [YBF]
• Portia headed for a relapse? [PopBytes]
• Ummm…I think that baby should have been "Hung Up" in a car seat, Madonna. Sorry to preach, I know I'm not your papa. [HR]
• Death Row records is over. Of course, they'll release albums for years to come, prompting sentimental weirdos to say they're still around. [NYP]
• Reese taking one for the team. Literally. [ASL]
• Fox News trying their hardest to make a "faggot" out of a Southern accent. [Jossip]
• Saying Christina is Hollywood's hottest blond is like saying Pamela Anderson has Hollywood's best boobs. [HT]
Interesting progressive fact: Ellen Degeneres became the first lesbian to host the Academy Awards. Yay for the acceptance of differences!
Ms. D made history as the first lesbian to host the Oscars, an especially magnificent milestone considering all the homophobic dialogue as of late. With regard to those scandals and other discriminatory diatribes, Ellen had this to say:
If there were no blacks, Jews and gays, there'd be no Oscars.
Of course, Ellen trotted out a few of her standard pantsuits last night, albeit in a variety of rich colors and lush fabrics. I'm saying red velvet with the white loafers was the best, although the blue velvet looked good with Portia's gown.
Now that we've had a lesbian Oscar host, we've got to focus on getting a gay man an action hero part. And, after that, we've got to start spelling titles of movies that primarily showcase black actors correctly. And then we've got to ban the Wayans brothers from working.
[Source]
In her new interview with W, Ellen Degeneres and g/f Portia de Rossi reveal that they want to have a baby, but are still undecided as to whose oven the bun would bake in.
Ellen DeGeneres and her partner Portia de Rossi want to have a baby, but cannot decide which of them will give birth to the child. The chat show host and the former Ally McBeal star have been together for two years and would like to become parents, but must first decide who will carry the baby.
Portia told W magazine: “We would like to have children some day. Ellen would carry.”
Ellen replied: “That will never happen!”
I think, ultimately, Portia's probably going to get stuck getting preggo. I can't see Ellen doing it. Do they even make sensible maternity pantsuits?
[Source]
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