The Matt Grant edition of The Bachelor wasn't any more entertaining than every other season, but the breakup is proving otherwise. Former fiance (and constant famewhore) Shayne Lamas told People magazine about her plans for the engagement ring, purchased by ABC: She's keeping it "safe and clean and in a glass box — like a glass slipper." Also? Matt is totally on board with the idea and even "wants to come over and look at it."

Naturally, the magazine then got a response from Matt, because this is middle school and two adults can't just decide what to do with a piece of jewelry without using the media as a go-between. And, of course, Matt says he never spoke with Shayne about the subject.

We never discussed this. I never said it was cool to just keep it. If she said we spoke about it, she just made it up. Sometimes she thinks she can say anything and I’ll go along with it.

It wasn’t a ‘gift’ so much. It’s not a television or a handbag. It’s a symbol of marriage that didn’t happen. … Let’s have something good come out of this. Why hold onto it? What’s the point?

Matt wants to auction off the ring, valued at $65,000, and give the proceeds to charity. This, of course, will never happen, because then the spotlight would no longer be on Shayne, and we can't have that, can we?

SHOCKING! "The Bachelor: London Calling's Matt Grant has split from fiancée Shayne Dahl Lamas. 'We tried hard to make it work but we realized that we were both heading in different directions,' they said in a statement Thursday. 'We truly care about each other and will remain close friends.'"

We don't know what's sadder: The fact that some of these famewhores (Mekhi and Dita not included) were invited to the PokerStars.net Burlesque Party last night in Vegas or the fact that we can name most of these people.

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THAT WAS QUICK "[Reality show contestant] Matt Grant has moved out of fiancée Shayne Lamas’s condominium, but the English Bachelor insists that all is well with the two."

After accepting a proposal on reality television, the next logical step for Bachelor winner Shayne Lamas is posing for Girls Gone Wild magazine. Makes sense.

The six-page photo spread, which features no nudity, also includes an in-depth interview sure to be read by all GGW subscribers. Most notably, Shayne says she loves Matt because he is "respectful of women." And, judging by her latest venture, respect is very important to her.

So was I the only person who watched last night's Bachelor season finale? British Matt proposed to Shayne, the 22-year-old daughter of Lorenzo Lamas and this lovely creature. She's also an actress, but I don't need to tell you that — the clip above does all the talking. Watch as Shayne shows off her "shocked" and "in love" faces and delivers her lines, all the while making sure she doesn't let the camera see up her dress. It would be sweet if it didn't all sound so scripted. I give them two months.

I'm likely the only person left who watches The Bachelor, and it's probably a good thing. Nobody deserves to feast their eyes upon this lovely beauty, Michele, who is contestant Shayne's mother and the ex-wife of Hollywood legend Lorenzo Lamas. Why he left her, we will never know.