• Jessica Simpson attempts her best "sexy" face. [HT]
• "Ali Lohan is ready to follow in big sis Lindsay's musical footsteps" is not a compliment, Ali. Sorry. [INO]
• What the hell happened to Jake Gyllenhaal? [ICYDK]
• Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson got matching tattoos, because that's what BFFs do. [Yeeeah]
• Sacha Baron Cohen's daughter: A mini-Borat. [PS]
• The next classic Hollywood has decided to destroy: The Witches of Eastwick. We give up. [DListed]
• Eva Mendes flashes everyone for half a second in her new Calvin Klein commercial. Predictably, the world is going nuts. (Slightly NSFW) [ICYDK]
• Terrible idea of the day: Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are planning to get married. Oh, and it's going to coincide with her album release, of course. [INO]
• Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal will not be getting married this winter. Why anybody cares is beyond us. [PS]
• More proof of the end of days: Justin Timberlake might host the Oscars. [DListed]
• Balthazar Getty finally wised up and dumped Sienna Miller. [Yeeeah]
• Just what we've always wanted: A gallery of Chris Brown's tattoos. [CityRag]
Pharrell Williams has decided he wants to clean up his image by getting rid of his tattoos. But hip hop's latest diva doesn't want typical laser removal — that's for the little people.
It's basically like getting a skin graft, but you're not taking skin from your ass or your legs. These guys actually grow the skin for you. First you have to give them a sample of your skin, which they then replicate. Once that's been done, they sew it on — and it's seamless. … It's going to be pricey, but worth it. I got fire on my arms! I'm a grown man!
Hey, um, Pharrell? If you want to look your age, perhaps you can skip over the outrageous procedures and simply stop wearing a SpongeBob SquarePants shirt. Just a thought.
[Source]
Here's a pet peeve of mine that you might find silly: I hate it when an actor's tattoos become a character's tattoos. I think it smacks of laziness and unoriginality.
This one is pretty bad, but the most egregious I've ever seen is in Belly, when the camera lingers for about two seconds on Method Man's Wu-Tang piece.
Does this bother you, too?
Why are ironic tattoos always so light on the funny and heavy on the sad? Maybe it's because, when you really think about it, what this guy has actually done is chosen to sacrifice time, money and bodily injury in order to tell the world that he likes reruns.
Click through for lots more "zany" tattoos of famous people.
CONTINUED »
Mariah Carey, who seems to have forgotten about that whole laser removal technique:
One thing [few people] knew was we got tattoos a few weeks earlier. So anyone who saw my ["Mrs. Cannon"] tattoo wasn’t surprised. To me rings are special and exciting, but tattoos mean more than anything. They’re forever and ever.
[Source]
Oprah held a minor news conference today to discuss Mariah Carey's wedding, and she even showed the not-so-exciting wedding photos from People magazine. More fascinating, however, was the revelation that she got a "Mrs. Cannon" tattoo a few weeks back. Still not interesting? OK, you're right.
Click through to watch Oprah get wayyyyy too excited about this whole thing. CONTINUED »
Who's the proud owner of this new tattoo?
Update: You guessed it. The tat, reading "the rice is fried in pork fat," is a fake. Seems Ashton is getting desperate. CONTINUED »
• Some things don't ever need to "git dun." [BWE]
• The New York Times is now sparking gay rumors. Give it two more years before Family Circus is next to Maureen Dowd. [DListed]
• This just keeps getting better: Eliot Spitzer's number one lady was once the star of a Girls Gone Wild scene. [HT]
• It's NYC graffiti, son! Co-opt that shit. [CityRag]
• Carrie Bradshaw says she's angry about Maxim naming her the least sexy woman in the world, and that it made her husband, Matthew Broderick, question his taste in women. Understandable, but they should both realize they're getting mad at Maxim, laugh and then use that paper erection as kindling. [Yeeeah]
• Candy Spelling gets blog space on the Huffington Post? Really? Oh, cruel media. [ICYDK]
• Ashley Tisdale is a Muppet, right? [INO]
• Hey, it's a nominative determinism gallery! [CityRag]
• Charlotte York has a sex tape!!!!???!?!?!?!??! [DListed]
• Jennifer Aniston and her "ridiculous body." We're not sure if that's a compliment. [PS]
• Tara Reid and her ridiculous body. That's definitely not a compliment. [HT]
• David Beckham's new tattoo supposedly reads as follows: "Birth 'til Death, rich or poor, it’s all up to God." Profound. [INO]
• Thanks for this, tabloids: "Angelina Jolie buys Shiloh Cheetoes" [ICYDK]
• This is the prostitute for whom Eliot Spitzer pissed away his life. She's 22, from New Jersey (no duh!) and a budding singer. Oh, yeah, she's also willing to have sex with unattractive but powerful men for money. Friend her on MySpace! [NYT]
• Rosie O'Donnell's partner currently looks like Susan Powter used to look. Yes, compliment. [DListed]
• It wasn't that cold yesterday. [PS]
• "Want To Know How Much Angelina Jolie’s Outfit Costs?" Huh? Do ya? Do ya? [INO]
• As a child, Julie Andrews was molested by her stepfather, but she still kept his surname. Sick all around. [ICYDK]
• More of the same from Carmen Electra. Honestly, she needs to give it up. Everything. Just stay at home and relax. Enough with the modeling. [HT]
• Why do celebrities get such bad tattoos? [CityRag]
• Here's Amnesia Sparkles – the drag queen responsible for making Cord "Cordless" – explaining how this Sunday's Oscars will be like sex with a black man. As you might guess, it's NSFW. [Queerty]
• Idle Americans are prepared to again fawn over American Idols, many of whom will soon become idle Americans once again. [DListed]
• That's not the breast place for a tattoo, Christina. [HT]
• A silvery Rihanna awaits your approval here. [INO]
• "I'm the Hillary Clinton of the Oscars." [ICYDK]
• Go organic! It'll make you feel like a new person filled with alien spirits! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! [CityRag]
• Hey! More and more people are discovering that we have too many goddamn golf courses in this country. Cacti of the American Southwest, we've made the first step. [NYT]
• Guys like this are why Brooklyn pwns Manhattan. [CityRag]
• Lindsay Lohan's father says he will not be ogling pictures of his naked daughter, despite their "artistic" slant. This surprises people for some reason. [DListed]
• That guy from Varsity Blues whose main character trait was his morbid obesity is now thin! There goes a career as "Fat Man #2." Hope it was worth it. [EBG]
• Jamie Lynn Spears, the one going to destroy her child, has been grounded. See? Those parents understand "discipline." [PS]
• Rihanna recently went shopping for art. Or, more likely, Rihanna recently went to a gallery and bought whatever the curator called "edgy." [INO]
• Harry Potter and Hermione are totally muggling each other. (We know muggle means non-wizard, nerd.) [ICYDK]
• Stacy Keibler, stop it! [HT]
• Scarlettoo. [Yeeeah]
• Black panther is always a good look. [SH]
• Nicolas Cage: "I have never been arrested for anything in my life, nor have I stolen a dog." [DListed]
• What We Can Learn from Heath Ledger's Death: Don't Mix Downs!!! [HuffPo]
• Adam Sandler stands up for Tom Cruise! Read his rant in a weird, screamy voice for authenticity. [EBG]
• Celebrities as Disney characters: Not a stretch. [PS]
• Can you find the irony in this sentence?: "Here’s Kim Kardashian at the beach covering her big fat ass once again. I hate girls that are insecure. It’s the most unattractive quality to have." [HT]
• Hey, Ashley, where's your weird sister and her security detail? [INO]
• Two deaths a minute in the new Rambo flick! [ICYDK]
• Celebrity coke dealer talks! [Yeeeah]
• Celeb tats: Don't do it. [CityRag]
We hope that tattoo is a fake, but if it's not, it's good to see Jude contemplating why the hell he had it done by such a talentless hack.
[Source]
Thousands of LA's boredest turned out last Friday and Saturday to be a part of LA Ink star Kat Von D's world record attempt. Gunning her way into the Guinness Book, the tattoo maven marked indelibly THE LOGO OF HER REALITY SHOW onto 400 human beings, presumably all of whom look forward to the day they will be able to tell their grandkids how much they loved TV.
Editor
