I’m feeling honest today, so I’m about to do something therapeutic: I’m coming clean about some things I’m ashamed to admit that I enjoy. As part of my job, I have to be judgmental and critical — but sometimes I just want to confess my undying love for the celebrities and shows the public majority views as repulsive. So here’s my list of six things I’m embarrassed to reveal. Admitting my problem is the first step to recovery.
OK, so this is another Hills post. But before you start shaking your fists and cursing my name, let me state for the record that I truly feel in my heart this is worthy of a posting, if only for the pure enjoyment of watching David Letterman make fun of Spencer Pratt for six minutes. To make matters worse, Dave gets so annoyed by Spencer that he resorts to visiting Heidi in the green room, where the interview grows 10 times more awkward than previously imagined. By the end of it all, I’m still left wondering: With The Hills on hiatus and no LC sex tape rumor to promote, what the hell was Spencer doing on Letterman in the first place? CONTINUED »
Despite a recent photo shoot gone wrong, Hills frenemies Audrina Patridge and Lauren Conrad stepped out and took a united stand in the name of alcohol last night at LA’s Crown Bar.
Across town, Stephanie Pratt was blabbing to Us Weekly about the feud in which she is not involved, saying she doesn’t think everything is OK between the two roommates: “But I’m sure they will work it out — they have been best friends for so long.” Just like LC and Heidi, right?
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DRAMA QUEENS “After [Lauren Conrad] came home last week to find a weekly mag doing a photo shoot with Audrina [Patridge] in the house they share, the claws were out! Our spies say Lauren threw the hissy (stomping, the works) because she’d already promised exclusive pics of the backyard to another mag. Never mind that Audrina pays rent to her and had gotten the OK from LC’s rep who, apparently, forget to clue their client in.”
Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag ruined one of the most beloved children’s characters at an AIDS benefit yesterday in LA. Barney would have been infinitely cooler had he eaten the reality show losers, so now he’s kind of dead to me.
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LIKE MOTHER, LIKE DAUGHTER “Apparently the 44-year-old mother of Audrina from The Hills downed margaritas and flirted with 21-year-old Jason Wahler at a party her daughter also attended. Just in case you were wondering where Audrina got her savoir faire and excellent taste in guys.”
Well, let’s discuss the good news first: As of this very moment, there are no plans for a Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt reality show.
The bad news: There will be a Hills spin-off — focusing on Lauren Conrad’s friend and co-worker Whitney Port, who has publicly said she would never move in with Lauren because she can’t handle the cameras being around at all times.
MTV is prepping a show in which Whitney Port, 23, becomes bicoastal while working for fashion PR firm People’s Revolution — and befriends a group of NYC gals (including socialite Olivia Palermo).
Says the insider: ‘There will be more blondes in the city than you ever expected!’
The only person less deserving of a Hills spin-off is dead-eyed Audrina Patridge. Seriously, we love Whitney and all, but there’s no way she can carry an entire reality show on her own. Why not give Lo her own series? Now that we would watch. (OK, fine. We’re going to watch Whit’s show, too.)
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Are you ready for the worst 30 seconds of your life? Heidi Montag, Spencer Pratt and Pete Wentz teamed up to shoot a commercial for some new Friday Night MTV thing (called F N MTV), but for the first few seconds we thought we really were watching an episode of The Hills. If this is the couple “acting,” then that should clear up any confusion in the minds of the slower MTV viewers as to whether or not the Speidi relationship is authentic.
The MTV Movie Awards were held last night, and I admittedly couldn’t bring myself to sit through the hours-long crapfest. Just by looking at the pictures (after the jump), it’s obvious I didn’t miss much.
Anyone care to share exciting stories from the show (if you decided to punish yourself last night)? CONTINUED »
The Hills cast celebrated hanger-on Frankie Delgado’s birthday last night in Las Vegas, and the event’s pictures speak a thousand words … kinda. Here’s what we’ve gathered: Audrina is back with Justin Bobby (!!!), there’s still tension between Audrina and the duo of LC/Lo, Brody is still stringing Lauren along, and Stephanie Pratt is taking full advantage of her fake fight with Speidi. Oh, and Lo is still awesome.
Did we leave anything out?
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This week’s Spencer Pratt advice column is an issue near and dear to his heart: “How can I stop feeling bad about banging a celeb?” If we had a dollar for every time we asked ourselves that, we’d be broke, but you can rest assured Spence knows what he’s doing. Except replace “celeb” with “D-list reality show pony.”
It’s happening: Us Weekly’s “exclusives” with Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt came to fruition this week with a huge cover story detailing the couple’s reconciliation and plans to marry (again). Heidi says she changed her mind about calling off their previous engagement because she realized Spencer is her soulmate. Also? Because she gets more attention — and money — this way. But, for a minute, let’s pretend all this isn’t completely fabricated:
What changed? On-and-off beau Spencer Pratt convinced her to plan their wedding again during a secret make-or-break getaway to Mexico.
‘Heidi read me biblical passages like “Honor thy wife,”‘ says Pratt.
… Nope, can’t do it. Too ridiculous.
You didn’t think we had forgotten about the weekly advice dished out by Spencer Pratt, did you? America’s favorite d-bag is back, and this time he’s advising a gay man on how to manipulate and humiliate his straight friends. Spencer dispenses a golden nugget of wisdom in which he points out that, without evidence, you have no case. So that whole thing where you and Heidi went on every talk show imaginable and declared that there really was an LC sex tape but no proof — what was that about?
It’s called taking your own advice. Try it.
Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag (whose father owns a restaurant) don’t seem to grasp the concept of tipping well at dinner. The most annoying couple on the planet took two “friends” out to an LA restaurant this weekend and ran up a $783 bill. The couple tipped $16. Luckily for the waiter, a producer from The Hills — who was at the restaurant filming scenes for the upcoming season — gave him $60 from his own pocket to cover the rest of the tip. (Note: A minimal 15 percent tip would have been over $117.)
So we’re guessing Heidiwood isn’t selling that well?
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Hills resident Audrina Patridge celebrated her 23rd birthday this weekend in Las Vegas, and noticeably absent were Lauren Conrad and the show’s camera crew. Could Audrina and LC be on the outs just in time for the fourth season? We sure hope so, because a Hills without Speidi and Audrina — and more Lo, Whitney and Kelly Cutrone — is a happy Hills.
Also of note: Audrina, honey, it’s probably not best to wear bright pink underwear with a see-through black dress (see fourth photo). Just trying to help.
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There are times when we ask ourselves, “Who the hell would seek advice from Spencer Pratt?” That’s why his Radar magazine column is informational — it reminds the world that Spence isn’t the only tool in America. This week, a reader is suffering the age-old dilemma of how to tell part of his crew that he can’t roll with them — after all, the exclusive clubs don’t let in more than five guys holding hands at a time. Or something like that.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you, guy.
Here’s what I learned from last night’s finale of The Hills: Nothing ever really happens on this show. Yes, it took me three seasons to figure that out. It finally clicked as I realized that the ending cliffhanger was part of last week’s sneak peek. So, basically, the whole show was leading up to the moment we were waiting for (Lauren and Audrina’s confrontation), but by the time this came to fruition, the credits were rolling. How cheap.
In other news, Heidi and Spencer were nowhere to be found during the finale party — thank goodness — and the rest of the Hills ladies wore outfits similar to what we see all the time. Yawn.
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Heidi Montag is back this week with an appearance on Ellen, and it’s the same stuff she’s been saying on every talk show — Lauren Conrad is evil, Heidi didn’t start the sex tape rumor, she’s praying for LC, etc. But the interesting thing about this clip is how she has taken to talking just like Spencer Pratt — it’s disturbing, but not nearly as bad as her hollow claims that she has lots of friends (like her sister).
Full video after the jump. CONTINUED »
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