— Thu, Mar 8, 2007 —

After seeing several comments like this peppered about the Internet, I have now come across this:

Brooke Hogan is confusing. One minute she???s complaining to her daddy about how much she wants to be the next Britney Spears (pre-meltdown, I hope), and the next minute she shows up at a BET event looking like this. Is this chick even white? I mean, the complexion is vanilla enough. But then I see those nails and how she???s flashin??? her bling all up in people???s faces and shizz, and it makes me all confused. Maybe the 12-inch nails and ???fly??? getup are meant to symbolize racial harmony in the music industry. Or maybe she???s just a straight-up female wigger.

Here's the definitive explanation of Brooke Hogan: she is starting to immerse herself in hip-hop culture (read: black) because pop culture (read: white) continues to mock her physicality.

In case you didn't know, black men have been proven to prefer larger women. And, while that preference is steadily declining, black men are still more likely to be attracted to heavier women than their white counterparts.

So, knowing that she's going to be unaccepted in mainstream media, Brooke or her handlers have decided to focus attention on a market that might be more willing to appreciate her.

She's a girl that was born big and is working with that she's got. It's that simple.

PS Let's kill the word "wigger" forever. Unless you have the balls to say "white nigger," you shouldn't be tossing wigger around. It's cheap and easy.

PPS She's not ugly or fat.


Read More: Brooke Hogan, Top


No. 1
diva says:

I partly agree with you but she'll never fit in with hip hop. she should just stick with pop. I wouldn't say black men perfer "larger woman" but curvier woman. Brooke should be glad she doesn't look like her skinny sickly looking white counterparts. Despite all that i still can't stand her.

March 8, 2007 1:35 PM
No. 2
Kitchy says:

I agree that she's not fat. I do not at all agree that she's not ugly. I think she rivals Tori Spelling when it comes to manly-fug.

March 8, 2007 1:46 PM
No. 3
bc says:

I honestly thought Brooke was Ashley Simpson after yet another round of surgery.

March 8, 2007 2:01 PM
No. 4
Shants says:

Wrong, She is both ugly and fat... Her nails are rad, but she's a mess.
and p.s. can I just ask: has anyone out there even heard one of her songs? would the average BET watcher be down?

March 8, 2007 2:03 PM
No. 5
SugarBlind says:

Find me a man who doesn't like big breasts, curvy hips, and an ass he can hang on to, and I'll find you a man whose dating pool is down to about 2% of the female population.

God, if I were 5'11" like Brooke, I'd be glad to just not weigh 200 lbs. She's doing what she can with what she's got, and you know... I'd like to see someone say those nasty things to her face. She's still Hulk's daughter-- she can probably take out a full grown man without breaking one of those (admittedly horrendous) nails.

March 8, 2007 2:06 PM
No. 6
Lids says:

You know, she doesn't actually look that bad her, compared to her usual look. The nails and tacky jewellery have to go, but at least her make up is soft and pretty, and I think that outfit isn't all that bad (especially compared to what she usually wears).

March 8, 2007 2:09 PM
No. 7
Leslie says:

She is like the Diet version of Ice-T's Coco... Like the Coco for kids, or Coco Light!! I just wish she still had her teeth grill to accent her bitchin nails!

March 8, 2007 2:19 PM
No. 8
blondie says:

Brooke isn't fat or ugly, she's just very fake and generic looking. Other than the square face, she looks like every other blonde spray-tanned actress/model/singer out there. And I can't even begin to imagine how much plastic surgery she has had.

March 8, 2007 2:22 PM
No. 9
B says:

"Coco Light"...that is priceless!

March 8, 2007 2:25 PM
No. 10
Alison says:

finally someone else acknowledges how racist the term wigger is!! i hate when people use that word. brooke still sucks, tho.

March 8, 2007 2:32 PM
No. 11
Claire Z. says:

I disagree re: the word "wigger." I don't think it means "white nigger" to all people who use it. To me it means a white person who awkwardly or unnaturally adopts some elements of black culture (maybe with a little white trash thrown in). I think the main thrust of disdain when someone's called a 'wigger' is that they're basically being a specific kind of poseur. Maybe we should call them bloseurs instead. Black poseurs.

March 8, 2007 2:35 PM
No. 12
Cait says:

She has the potential to be pretty darned cute, but she ruins it with tanorexic skin, overprocessed hair, tranny make-up, ill-fitting clothes and Elvira nails.

If she were just to tone it down a few notches, she'd be far more attractive. She's just a young'un; why does she need to try to look like she's Ice-T's wife?

March 8, 2007 2:41 PM
No. 13
Claire says:

I think it would be hilarious/awesome if one of these girls who is so struggling to find a niche for herself/be taken seriously (Brooke, Ashlee) gave up the performing thing and then got really famous for writing a really good book. We need a super famous author to hit up all the parties. We need a new Truman Capote.

Maybe I'll just do it.

March 8, 2007 2:49 PM
No. 14
SugarBlind says:

Claire Z, I agree with your take on "wigger." I don't think the W necessarily comes from "white", although it DOES apply. I see it more as "wanna-be". And the "igger" part, while obviously drawn from an offensive (YET LEGAL ACCORDING TO THE CONSTITUTION-- FU NY!) word, seems to indicate a crudeness of personality or carriage, rather than referring to the people the "wigger" is imitating. I hope that makes sense...

March 8, 2007 2:51 PM
No. 15
Cait says:

Oooh, now there's an idea. Brooke could be a more approachable, less reclusive, wittier Pynchon, perhaps?

Holy shit, I just wrote the most pretentious thing ever...well, apart from Mischa Barton namedropping book club authors in a desperate attempt to seem MENSA-qualified.

March 8, 2007 2:53 PM
No. 16
SugarBlind says:

*ahem* I meant the First Amendment. My bad. Been a long time since civics class.

March 8, 2007 2:53 PM
No. 17
Leslie says:

Because Ice-T's wife Coco is a beautiful graceful butterfly... why wouldn't Brook want to emulate that! LOL

I joke but really I love them both (Coco and Coco light) they are cringe inducing beauties... they are the definition of Hot Mess and that is there claim to fame!

March 8, 2007 2:54 PM
No. 18
Lale says:

I'm glad I'm not the only one who doesn't think Brooke is ugly. Girlfriend's cute- she's just not a little peanut. She reminds me of Darryl Hannah when it comes to makeup, though- put red lipstick on her and she immediately converts to looking like a dude in drag. And Brooke's poor taste in accessories (i.e. grillz) really are not flattering.

I think the larger problem is that she's not really a very good singer, and the hype is backfiring. She's fine, and I'm sure she could kick some ass in karaoke, but she's too old to be the next Britney, not talented enough to compete with Cristina, and Ciara has got the R&B covered. Plus, Brooke is a super lip syncher, which only worked for Brit Brit cause she was a really good dancer.

If Brooke needs a job in showbiz (because the truth is, she doesn't strike me as the academic type, plus I am putting forth intentions for the cancellation of their horrible TV show), she should get a gig as a host or something. I think "America's Coolest Pets" might have an opening. Or better yet, "Dancing with the Stars." Then she could move on to bigger and better things, like a guest spot on the EW's "Girlfriends."

March 8, 2007 2:56 PM
No. 19
ashtraygirl says:

I agree. Good post.

March 8, 2007 3:06 PM
No. 20
Lale says:

Oops. I mean the CW. Right? All I know is, I watched that Pussycat Dolls show last night and there were way too many vomit shots for my taste. Get it? Taste? Ha ha!

March 8, 2007 3:20 PM
No. 21
Be Adequite! says:

Ok will someone tell me who this girl/man/woman is, other than Hogan's daughter? I'm confused.

I'm with Cord on the w*gger comment, it's of course not as offensive as the n-word, but still too close for me...besides we just refer to those particular white boys as "suburban".

March 8, 2007 4:12 PM
No. 22
sexyback says:

Does anyone else think she's starting to look like Jessica Simpson? Maybe it's just the hair and that chin that's confusing me.

By the way, I LOVE the pretentious comment, Cait! I never thought I would see Pynchon and Brooke Hogan mentioned in the same post!

March 8, 2007 4:37 PM
No. 23
lizard says:

Wow. You are amazing. I can't believe you cited Sex Roles!! It is so refreshing to find a gossip/entertainment blogger who resists the whole Howard Stern mentality of "being too subversive" for the system, when in reality they are the most vocal supporters of misogyny, homophobia, and racism that has been around forever. Hmm..that sounded very bitter. Anyways, just wanted to say that your perspectives both of pop culture, and the public reaction to the media, are unique and very welcome!

March 8, 2007 4:38 PM
No. 24
Carly says:

I must have missed the memo that said she was fat. I don't see it.

March 8, 2007 4:43 PM
No. 25
J says:

She's not fat, but everyone's used to seeing Paris and Nicole's chicken legs that people have forgotten how women are supposed to look like. I like mine with boobs, hips, flat stomach, and sexy legs- brooke just needs to improve in the facial dept.

March 8, 2007 4:47 PM
No. 26
Used to Love Her says:

You know, she would fit in better, even thick - IF a stylist would come in - COLD CLOCK HER MOM OUT COLD - (Cause you know bitch is behind these looks - she looks just like her ass) RIP off those nails - Throw some LOW lights in that damn hair and some darker extensions - SOFTER MAKEUP - and DECENT CLOTHES. I think she could have fit in. If they would have tied her MOM up in the basement but they didn't. I mean - it could still happen. Right?? UGH. Probably not.

March 8, 2007 4:48 PM
No. 27
J says:

"PS Let's kill the word "wigger" forever. Unless you have the balls to say "white nigger," you shouldn't be tossing wigger around. It's cheap and easy.

PPS She's not ugly or fat."

Yep. Cord tells it like it is!
When a fit young woman is called "fat" and everyone else is emulating and calling this "thing" http://www.deansplanet.com/images/celebs/broads/kimberly_stewart/kimberly_stewart-bikini_01.jpg sexy... Webster's Dictionary has some serious editting to do because those words aren't matching up.

March 8, 2007 4:53 PM
No. 28
aneurysm says:

y'know the problem here is, she is determined to use her daddy's money to make her famous & convince we the public to accept her as a pop star. maybe she should just accept noone gives a crap what she wants & wanting it sometimes doesnt make it so. she would have more luck following her dad's example & become a female wrestler.

March 8, 2007 5:46 PM
No. 29
Bystander says:

Brooke and Patti LaBelle share a stylist, Linda Stokes, found by Brooke's mom. The hip hop culture isn't something new she's trying out to try to find success as a larger woman. Linda Stokes has been dressing her for years, and I think that is the reason why she fails to be perceived as fashionable. Also, Linda Stokes used to dress Britney too.

March 8, 2007 5:51 PM
No. 30
Amazon says:

OK, Coco is NASTY..sorry, Ice. This girl looks nothing like that I-am-27-years-old-but-look-47 Coco. But Brooke does remind me of Ashley Simpson.

In this picture, she should definitely rid herself of the nails, and possibly the outfit. But her make-up looks very light--i.e. natural, not heavy. I dig it. And I don't think she is ugly. But take that with a grain of salt--I am a straight woman. Straight men have been known to disagree with my selections!

She does strong features, I will admit that, but it is NO WHERE as 'masculine' as that Coco thing. YUCK!

Regarding hip-hop culture: do your thang, girl. I really don't care what she does, let her try to build hers. I am all about enterprising young people.

A little aside: coco in Haitian creole means: pussy.

Take that!

March 8, 2007 7:55 PM
No. 31
my 2 cents says:

Are you guys trying to say Brooke is fat? Whatever. As for her nails, why the He%^ is it ok for a black woman to have long nails, but holy He&$ if a white woman does it. Get off yourselves, People are people and as for her being the next Brittany Squears opps I mean Spears. I truely hope not Brooke you are FAR FAR BETTER than that!

March 8, 2007 9:48 PM
No. 32
wigger? HER FATHER IS A RACIST!!! says:

excuse me???
I met her father "hulk" hogan at a 'celebrity' shotgun tournament in Innisfil, Ontario, Canada. He was inside the proshop signing his autograph. The guy is a complete racist!!! he was also blatantly hitting on and gave his phone number to an underaged server. His wife and daught must be proud of poppa. He is such a chauvanistic racist pig. I feel sorry that Brooke looks like her father.

March 8, 2007 10:16 PM
No. 33
mel says:

i love you cord.

March 8, 2007 10:55 PM
No. 34
Nikklov says:

I saw her in person and while she is tall... she is not that big. I would guess not an inch past a standard size 6/7 . Now by Nicole "Skin Bag and Bones" Richie hollywood standard she is "large" or "big" but not to anyone with eyes and a diet of 1200 calories (for fully functional brain allowing for clear thinking and good judgement)!!!!!!

March 8, 2007 11:54 PM
No. 35
Someone says:

Aww, I think she looks pretty in that pic!


March 9, 2007 12:10 AM
No. 36
CL says:

Wigger? I detest that word. Everytime a black man like you says that, you bring us all down by saying that white people that don't act sophisticated and have knowledge of pop colture are acting black, thus acting unsophisticated. And you criticised me for poking fun at a black man that had a big nose? Hmmph. Hypocrisy.
She is Italian, and they have darker colored skin, duh! You act so ignorant sometimes, Cord! Of course, like I said before, it matters which side of you writes these articles. Your black side, or your white side? Anyway, Brooke looks great. She is an awesome girl. Why are you so worried about her weight, Cord? And you don't know what kind of women I like, just because I am black! As long as the woman is clean and looks fine, who cares about her weight??? If you didn't think race mattered, you wouldn't mention it so often. Same with weight. I think you are so obsessed with weight because you are so slender. You probably only weigh in at 150Lbs.

March 9, 2007 12:40 AM
No. 37
Becca says:

I blame Scott Storch. Think about it...

In fact, I'd like to blame Scott Storch for all that is wrong with girls thinking this look is hot , long ugly fingernails, bling, and pop music in general.

Can we do that?

March 9, 2007 2:08 AM
No. 38
Jess says:

I don't understand the basis for your statement that black males' preference for larger women is declining.
The link you gave regarding it didn't really confirm this either.

I'm just curious.

March 9, 2007 5:16 AM
No. 39
Melissa says:

I love how people are getting upset about using the word "wigger" but it's ok to call Cord the "N" word?

March 9, 2007 8:15 AM
No. 40
Cypress says:

Presenting Brooke Hogan; The 'white' Serena Williams
and that won't ever be a good thang..

March 9, 2007 9:09 AM
No. 41
Jordan Johnson says:

Thanks for the link. =)

And yes, as someone else said, I was referring to a "wigger" as someone white who acts like a stereotypical black person. Not a "white nigger".


March 9, 2007 4:03 PM
No. 42
losercelebs says:

She's totally talentLESS. I'm so sick of seeing all these wannabies all over mags and the web just because someone they are related to are famous. Her dad worked hard to get where he is. She'll NEVER fit in because she isn't scary skinny but that's not to say I think she's in the least bit cute. She rubs me the WRONG way. She tries too hard to be black and YES she is a BIG BIG BIG girl. I saw her in person. She's very large boned. Oh well...I don't think she can sing anyway...she's just another dumb bleach blonde riding the coat tails..........

March 9, 2007 6:45 PM

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