Yesterday's smoke-filled Headline on Your Shoulders was funnier than every Cheech and Chong movie put together. That's not saying much, because those movies are god-awful, but know that wit was at a high (har, har, har).
Today's winner is shaine:
Mom, America Agree on Sanjaya: Puff, Puff . . . Pass.
Nicely done!
New HOYS is after the jump.
Let's see a snappy headline about the news that the LA City Attorney wants Paris "The Teflon Pawn" Hilton to do 45 days in jail for a probation violation in which she was caught driving on a suspended license.
While some sort of penalty is certainly long overdue for Hilton, let's try to keep the prison rape jokes to a minimum.
Let's see those wits!
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Hilton to rethink haircut as "worst thing to ever happen to" her.
Paris Wants Change of Venue, Requests Hanoi Hilton.
( I was going to add "Asks McCain What to Pack," but I thought it would be tacky. Less tacky if I mentioned that I DIDN'T do it…)
Paris goes to jail, deputies refuse to do cavity search.
Paris Hilton goes from Penal Injections to Penal Institution
"Put Paris in Solitary!"- Inmates Afraid of Outbreak.
Free! Paris Incarciration Considered Cruel and Unusual for Other Inmates.
Paris responds to "slammer" by bending over
Lost hitchhiker found during hilton's body cavity search…
45 MILLION days wouldn't make Paris any less shitty
or
Mollygood readers dare her to try her "n*gger/f*ggot" spewing and mocking of poor people while in jail
(not advocating rape, a punch in the face wouldn't be the end of the world)
Book now: 45 days, 45 nights, $0!!!
or
Paris to star in "Midnight Express" remake
Paris cries to the judge, "But orange is SO last season!!!"
HOT - Stripes are the new black, says Paris
PANDEMONIUM! Petrified Paris Poos Panties in Prison Penalty Panic!
Irrevrent, Worthless Whore to be Incarcerated
Paris agreess to sentence, as long as she gets the V.I.P. section.
Hilton and Francis together again: Inmates gone wild