The Circle Of Life
In a move that surprises absolutely no one, Jessica Simpson has decided to pimp out some random brand of beer called Stampede. Of course that's what it's called. If you're going to return to your Texas roots, you might as well go all the way. (Although we're surprised she didn't go with Lone Star instead.)
And if that cheesy picture isn't enough to make you want to run out and buy a 12-pack, here's what Jess has to say: "I work out and take care of myself. But I also like a cold beer once in a while. That's why I made the smart choice with a smart beer." Fail.
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porn face!
OK Whitney, your "fail" at the end of the quote is hilarious!
She is a failure, on astronomical proportions.
Oh, and B, "Porn face" was totally photoshopped!
I live in Dallas and drink my fair share of beer and I've never heard of Stampede
When I think of "being smart" and "drinking smart" Jessica Simpson is the last person that comes to mind.
well she does look thirsty :-O
Lone Star wouldn't associate itself with this twat.
Here's the thing - I don't want to hate her any more, it's tiring…but then she keeps doing crap like this.
Her continuing "celebrity" status does make me wanna drink …
Epic Fail.
I don't think Stampede is a Texas beer, I've never heard of it and I've been stuck in Houston for a while.
I swear this girl is turning into Pamela Anderson!
Please stop making those faces.
WHOSE FACE IS THAT. I see Suri's mouth… a football player's jaw… a shrinky dink of jessica's nose…
and i'm right with beebs, nothing says smart like jessica simpson.
Kind of like the "stampede" to see Major Movie Star?
That face?! I'm thinking she's having good times with that Stampede bottle - and not by drinking it.
I'm quite confident that the marketing department for "Stampede" is clearly run by interns. Interns who inhale fumes from whipped cream bottles, no less.
Give it a few months and their slogan will be, buy our beer and Jenn will show you a boob.
great. now i hate beer.
if she starts selling scotch, someone is going to get a two by four to the face.
Jessica: Smart - Smart: Jessica. Nope, still doesn't work. Maybe I need more beer? Gah - damn advertisers.
It doesn't even look like her, daddy is shelling out the big bucks fer some photo shoppin!
Does she EVER take a picture with her mouth shut?
She looks as stupid as always! She is still a loser….now on that hawks some no name beer! She will never be country but she will always be TRASH!!!
just me: she wouldn't be able to breathe if she did.
@Kate, I really appreciated your double meaning there. Both are 100% applicable.\
Jessica Simpson has been lucky and I think she's aware of it. I think she's just taking whatever work comes her way because she knows the train'll be coming to a stop pretty soon and she has no time to waste. Hope she's putting her money away for her old age (expected sometime next year.)
And yes, she's obviously a mouthbreather. She may be saving up to fix that deviated septum.
She looks barred out.
Great beer, it's from Dallas TX