Celebrity Couple Alert! MarLeanor!

Joan is just quoting Wedding Crashers. It's a coded, "Get well" to Owen Wilson, obviously.

It probably would have been better if she called Eleanor a crazy old dyke and Mary Todd Lincoln an ugly rug muncher

I know, like I'm left to wonder how Joan knows which one was the "crazy" one? Did she stay up with MTL one night doing coke and getting wild betwixt the sheets or what?

It's hard not to be homophobic when you're so lifted your vagina's on your chin. One hug from Ellen Degeneres and you've accidentally had lesbian sex.

I don't think it's Joan being homophobic, I think she is trying in her mind to be a bawdy old dame, who can say anything and people will just let her because of who she is.

they look like incestuous sisters

It sounds like she must have had some Ambien before blogging. Who let gammy on the computer anyways. She can barely even drive.

If Joan's frontal lobe is in her lips, I know just the surgeon.

It's his specialty. I think it will be the only patient he doesn't try and hit on.

Ooh, their outfits are gorgeous. Except maybe Ellen's necklace.

Did Ellen get the knife? She's looking Heche-ey!

I think it's sweet that she would wear the spaghetti necklace Portia made her in class.

She probably made it in her, Female Empowerment, class/how to express your emotions in the medium of pasta.