Poor Eli

eliatespys.jpg

The pained expression you see at left is Eli Manning's best attempt at a smile during Justin Timberlake's EPSY Awards opening monologue. We couldn't sit through the eight minutes of footage because Justin was just so painful to watch — like a small child trying to keep the attention while all the adults just sit around and ignore him in hopes he will go away. Unfortunately, Justin and his ego stuck around throughout the show.

Click through for the clip and let us know how long you were able to sit through that mess.

Jul 21, 2008 · posted by Whitney · Link · 31 Responses
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  • Comments (31)

    No. 1 deimos says:

    he's so annoying i didn't even make it to the start button.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 5:18 pm
    No. 2 MagStar says:

    He is so lame. Why couldn't have Will Ferrell taken over this mess. That would have been a fun show instead of this wannabe.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 5:25 pm
    No. 3 LMONEY says:

    His Bill Belichick joke wouldn't have bombed if he would have said his name right. Other than that, I don't see what is so bad about it. I think he did a great job.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 5:36 pm
    No. 4 kittenpaw says:

    Did he breathe helium before going on stage or does he always sound like that?

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 5:52 pm
    No. 5 yourmom says:

    I'm going to have to disagree with LMoney here, but that was one of the most awkward things I've ever witnessed. My personal highlight, however, was how UNBELIEVABLY EMBARASSED Eli Manning's date was about being called out on the fact that she (most likely) wouldn't have been dating him at this time last year. Hah!

    Gold digging whores are always funny. Kinda like misogyny.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 5:53 pm
    No. 6 kelly says:

    Two minutes…and that's with fast-forwarding.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 5:58 pm
    No. 7 molly says:

    Only in America would Timber(don't chop me now I'm having such a good time)lake be a star. Oh wait….we have Posh spice, Robbie Williams, Josh Stone, Sting….Oh wait…you now have them….

    Only in America etc etc….

    Land of the deaf, home of the brave, whatever…

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 6:43 pm
    No. 8 mrmonkeybottoms says:

    JT makes me laugh. Quiet, haters!

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 7:13 pm
    No. 9 jujubees says:

    You all are making fun of monkeybottoms true love. Haters, indeed. For shaaaaaaame.

    But as sucks as JT is there is one thing that doesn't suck, Commies™

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 7:16 pm
    No. 10 Lisa (#1) says:

    Hey, fill in the blank. You __________, pinko bastard.

    Now make that word plural.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 7:33 pm
    No. 11 jujubees says:

    I totally butchered my own sentence. Screw it.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 8:05 pm
    No. 12 judgeMENTAL says:

    Eli Manning looks like he just took a dump in his pants and also I think he really did see a woman naked for the first time, which is why Blondebo Barbie™ started laughing so hard. Sorry, I'm not a fan of Justin at all, but I didn't think it was that bad.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 8:19 pm
    No. 13 sar says:

    juju started a "TM" craze!!

    i'm not participating because i am too lazy.

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 8:29 pm
    No. 14 jujubees says:

    Well, it's pretty easy on my mac so there's no thinking involved. If there were actual steps involved I'd skip it. I can also do this £ and ¶ plus, ª. Jealous!

    Posted: Jul 21, 2008 at 9:33 pm
    No. 15 mwah says:

    ummmmmm that's eli's new wife

    and your mom- she's a gold digging whore because she married him? you sound a little bitter cause you married a broke guy.

    too bad
    sooo sad
    for you.
    lol

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 12:49 am
    No. 16 YerMom says:

    Yay for the Manning brothers! Their mother must be so proud. His wife seems like a true love and not just a trophy wife. Don't hate. My weakness for the Manning brothers is deep.

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 4:22 am
    No. 17 just me says:

    He is such a punk a$$ wannabe. I can't stand him-sounds like a little sissy!

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 4:28 am
    No. 18 BrittanyBlogs says:

    How did he even get this gig? Just "ditto" # 18's comment for me. And how does he date the likes of Cameron or Jessica?

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 7:31 am
    No. 19 sefatia says:

    I hate Eli Manning but I will say that his wife (not his trophy girlfriend) has been with him for a LONG time. They did just recently get married. Hence Timberlake's bad joke.

    His monologue was impossible to sit through and the song and dance number was akin to water torture. There is NO WAY I'm watching any of this again.

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 10:39 am
    No. 20 blah says:

    Is it me, or does Eli Manning look like some cop from an early 80's detective show? He looks like an extra on "Hunter".

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 10:51 am
    No. 21 poo says:

    You can call him a douche any one of a thousand ways and still not scratch the surface of his amazing douchebaggery. It's that immense.

    And it's easy to read Will Farrell's mind: DIAFF.

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 11:13 am
    No. 22 AJ says:

    JT rocked! He was quite funny. YOu know he didn't write the jokes, right? Next year you can have Charles Barkley host it and see how freakin' painful it would be. Or better yet I. Thomas. Now there's some hosting genius.

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 11:53 am
    No. 23 Blog Envy Is The New Black says:

    I thought I was the only one who found that mess painfull!

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 5:08 pm
    No. 24 Harper says:

    I thought it was funny and I am not a Timberlake fan.

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 5:19 pm
    No. 25 mbad says:

    I thought he was hilarious!!

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 5:34 pm
    No. 26 seth says:

    I thought he was pretty funny

    Posted: Jul 22, 2008 at 8:45 pm
    No. 27 Daria at Gorgeous Black Women says:

    Eli Manning is cute. Does he play a sport? I don't like athletes.

    Posted: Jul 23, 2008 at 11:22 pm
    No. 28 Daria at Gorgeous Black Women says:

    Oh, is he related to Peyton Manning? If so, Eli got the long end of the pretty stick.

    Posted: Jul 23, 2008 at 11:23 pm
    No. 29 Josh W. says:

    You people are weird. Stupid comments all over this page..
    JT was hilarious

    Posted: Jul 26, 2008 at 2:16 am
    No. 30 Espys Opening Monlogue Transcript says:

    Wow you guys are trippin. You must be Patriots fans. Thats the only Explanation. Click my name for a transcript of his monologue. Peace!

    Posted: Jul 26, 2008 at 1:12 pm
    No. 31 memphis lover/motherbear says:

    TOP THINGS THAT JUSTIN F'ed UP:
    - said the Memphis coach's name a little bit wrong, even though he's from memphis
    -Made the Memphis loss seem like the worst loss ever, thanks for sticking up for Memphis!
    - Made Eli and his wife mortified, but apparently she thought the naked woman joke was ha ha hilarious, thanks for sticking up for your husband!
    -poor Eli!!!
    -ruined the memphis tiger logo by putting a giant ego-tastic JT next to it

    Posted: Jul 26, 2008 at 11:34 pm
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