Indeed, not a single celebrity died during yesterday’s 5.8 earthquake in Los Angeles. But that’s not the only (yes we’re morbid) bad news: Mother Nature didn’t hamper a single reality television show filming in the area. The jerkoffs on Big Brother, who aren’t allowed any communication with the outside world, were told by producers that the reason the soundstage was shaking was not because Kirstie Alley had a new show filming next door, but because tectonic plates were moving about beneath them.
But there is one minuscule bit of good news.
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"See this shirt? Soon it will be the same colour as my skin! Free. Dye. Job. Peeps. See. Blondes CAN be smart."
I dont care how dumb and orange she is… She's super hot. I'd love to look like her. Only in a more natural shade.
I have abs and boobies just like that. But mine have been tortured by gravity and babies so they aren't exactly in the same place as her. So they're like that but a little more south. F'in gravity.
She is a good looking girl, but what is with the color?. I just don't get people who think turning themselves orange is attractive. At least it you get a real tan by the sun it looks natural. I look at orange people and think, I don't want you riding in my car of sitting on my furniture and rubbing off on them.
Maybe that makes me racist against orange people. If so, so be it.
She just wants her orange crush. Keebler doesn't care about orange people.
Oh do not get me started on those orange people who use the weight machines at the gym. If you are unfortunate enough to be the person to use it after them, it rubs off on your clothes. I nearly ruined my good t-shirt from the 1993 HFStival.
Orange people make me want to break my Macbook air.
Chill your baby knees out keebler.
i remember when i was an orange shorty.
It's not called ORANGE for nothing squid brains!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I remember when I wore orange shorts when I worked at Hooters.™
Ahem…That was supposed to be in quotation marks. Ahem…
that's it. i'm going to the tanning salon.
I really hope Kirstie Alley's new show involves her standing around and screaming "CHOCOLATE CAAAAAAAAKE!!!" because I didn't quite get enough of that from the Jenny Craig commercials.
I wish she was stand around and yell, I'M OOOOOOOOOOOOLD KIRSTIE, I HAVE A MANGINA.
What cheapass booth was she in? The shaking was pretty mild in LA, we're like 30 miles from the epicenter. Was her capsule stuck together with Elmer's Glue and spit?
If Kirstie yelled that, I would love her forever. And serve her Bailey's in a shoe on a regular basis. "Yes sir. Thank you sir."
She is also preparing for the end. She is tanning her hide so that when the time is right she can die to make the sacrificial saddles for the horsemen.