• Would it be worth it to sleep with Eva Longoria if you knew she would wake you up every morning at 5:30 by banging a gong? [Egotastic]

• Jada Pinkett Smith is a man, baby. [Faded Youth]

• Brittany Murphy desperately wants to be famous enough for her own "Got Milk" ad. [Hollywood Tuna]

• Ashlee Simpson wants you to love the skin your father is willing to buy you. [DListed]

• God, Jennifer Aniston, don't you know that blaming Vince Vaughn for your inability to quit smoking isn't going to make him want to hang around? [A Socialite's Life]

• Orlando Bloom stakes his claim on all things waifish and blonde. This time it's Claire Danes. [PopSugar]

• You can all sleep easy tonight knowing that Paris Hilton and Stavros Niarchos are back together. See, love really can conquer all. [Celebitchy]