Cityfile, a new Web site devoted to detailing the lives of New York's media celebrities, thus allowing people who are already narcissists to catapult their obnoxiousness to heretofore unseen heights, is something a rational person might not believe exists. ("Why?" "For whom?" Who's paying for this?") But this is the bluest state, friends, where undergrad degrees and company rivalries actually matter to people. And where public masturbation can pass as a reasonable business venture.

At right, Cityfile's "Top Lists" list for today. It's the most succinct explanation of New York City we've ever seen.