And People Are Afraid Obama Might Be Muslim?

At right is Pastor Thomas Muthee, an insane religious zealot from Kenya who claims to hunt witches. Cute, right? But Muthee isn't just any madman, he's one of vice-presidential nominee Sarah Palin's favorites, as she believes he used his magical powers to help her become governor of Alaska. Seriously!

At a speech at the Wasilla Assembly of God on June 8 this year, Mrs Palin described how Thomas Muthee had laid his hands on her when he visited the church as a guest preacher in late 2005, prior to her successful gubernatorial bid.

In video footage of the speech, she is seen saying: ???As I was mayor and Pastor Muthee was here and he was praying over me, and you know how he speaks and he???s so bold. And he was praying ???Lord make a way, Lord make a way.???

???And I???m thinking, this guy???s really bold, he doesn???t even know what I???m going to do, he doesn???t know what my plans are. And he???s praying not ???oh Lord if it be your will may she become governor,??? no, he just prayed for it. He said ???Lord make a way and let her do this next step. And that???s exactly what happened.???

She then adds: ???So, again, very very powerful, coming from this church,??? before the presiding pastor comments on the ???prophetic power??? of the event.

Prophetic, indeed.

Before Muthee got into politics, he was just a simple community disorganizer ruining people's lives. According to an interview Muthee did with the Christian Science Monitor, around 1989, after founding the Prayer Cave in Kiambu, Kenya, he prayed to know what was wrong with his village and was eventually shown that it was yoked by witchcraft. Right about then was a bad time to be a Kiambu fortune teller called Mama Jane. Because of her profession and because there were often car accidents near her home, Muthee very logically assumed that Mama Jane was a witch controlling all of Kiambu with spells, and he publicly declared as much. If you're up on your Miller you can guess how things went from there. 'Twas only a matter of time before Mama Jane was chased from town.

Just to recap: Sarah Palin believes this Muthee – this witch hunter!!!!!!!! – has "powerful" abilities that guided her into office. Hide your moles and birthmarks, everyone.

Sep 17, 2008 · posted by Cord Jefferson, MollyGood · Link · 36 Responses
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Comments (36)

No. 1 sar says:

You seem to be very adamant about not liking this man. ARE YE A WITCH??

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 9:37 am
No. 2 deimos says:

the correct term for cord would be "warlock"

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 9:46 am
No. 3 cerebratious says:

Frankly, I think it must be true considering she's the vice presidential nominee now, too. Maybe he had a bigger bowl of cereal than usual the morning he bewitched her.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 9:48 am
No. 4 deimos says:

or even "wizard" but that reminds me of those awful altell commercials…

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 9:48 am
No. 5 run for the hills people! says:

where is the video of this speech palin gave in june at the church? must have. spamming gop'ers with more evidence of their craziness awaits!

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 9:49 am
No. 6 Ska??i says:

Scary

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 9:51 am
No. 7 sar says:

Warlocks and Wizards? What are these foreign and conjured words? BE YE ALSO WITCHES??

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 9:52 am
No. 8 blah says:

Cord, try a little science and logic would you? If he weighs as much as a duck, he is indeed a witch. Duh.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 10:03 am
No. 9 April says:

the malleus malaficarum will be the number 2 best sell in the US, next to the bible, of course.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 10:38 am
No. 10 sar says:

damn, april. i had to look that shit up.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 10:50 am
No. 11 Keeblerkahn says:

In other news, John McCain got up to what he thought would be a nice day, read about this and said, Are you FUCKING kidding me!

I've said it before and I'll say it again. God help us if this women gets into the White House.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 10:51 am
No. 12 em says:

This is awesome. So in a few years are we going to go back to the whole "let's throw this person into a body of water to see if he/she sinks or floats" instead of, you know, trials with lawyers and stuff?

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 11:03 am
No. 13 April says:

Cord,

i hate you. you ruined my day by showing this. i cant even think straight knowing this. how can people find her credible? I dont understand.

::crawls in corner and cries::

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 11:11 am
No. 14 My Generation says:

Now let me see if I get this straight:

Mama Jane has the unfortunate circumstance of living by a road where several car accidents have been (and let???s be honest, how many could there possibly be in a town where Muthee conducts prayers in caves?)is accused as the source of all problems, and she???s run out of town. If it just took a few car accidents to run that vicious ???evil-doer??? out of town, than why hasn???t W and Rasputin Cheny been run out of office? Not enough accidents near 1600 Pennslyvania Ave?

Oh wait, now I remember, because in light of America being financially overburdened, its credit overextended, the economy and infrastructure crumbling, and billions dollars wasted on a war based on lies and deception, the GOP contents that everything is fine. I mean we aren???t in a recession after all, the income disparity isn???t widening in the land of the middle class, and the environment is just swell; and if you don???t believe it, then you shouldn???t read or think for yourself.

So all you religious zealots, and ???independent women voters??? out there let me be the first to congratulate the GOP of their wild card, Sarah Palin, and her historic, self-righteous, and ???divinely??? bestowed crusade to finally end a woman???s right to choose, and deny equality to every American. Cuntry first? You said it!

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 11:26 am
No. 15 Stoney says:

I can't wait for the GOP speeches when they claim we still live in the greatest country in the world and the morons all cheer like the brainwashed sheep they are.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 11:49 am
No. 16 ghostgirl says:

EM-great idea!!!!! If she floats,she's a witch,and they hang her in the town square! If she sinks,she's not a witch,but drowns!! See-EVERYBODY WINS!!! We can all meet in Salem on Halloween!!! I love you guys,I would be lost,witch,oh sorry, which would really suck.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 11:55 am
No. 17 sar says:

Hey Keeb - "God help us if this women gets into the White House." - it's kind of ironic, right? :) I mean isn't that the idea she's trying to get elected on?

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 12:05 pm
No. 18 Keeblerkahn says:

Lol, true.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 12:39 pm
No. 19 Alice says:

Why do people still like this bitch? I do not get it at all.

This is one of those things that proves the cultural divide. There are people that LOVE this woman. I can't fucking stand her. I don't think I could even begin to relate to the people that like her. Not a chance.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 12:41 pm
No. 20 RhymesWithSilver says:

Sarah Palin attended five different schools to finish her BA. Was one of them Hogwarts, perhaps?

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 2:16 pm
No. 21 jemms says:

whatever works!

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 2:30 pm
No. 22 bedbugsandballyhoo says:

Actually, I believe she taught at Hogwarts, And went by the name of Dolores Umbridge.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 2:45 pm
No. 23 orchid921 says:

Blah, I love you for that comment! Holy Grail is one of my favorite movies! That said, Palin scares the heck out of me.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 2:46 pm
No. 24 mutterhals says:

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 2:49 pm
No. 25 em says:

I think they've found an transcript of one of the seromns he gave at the Wasilla church.

"Ooh Eeh Ooh Ahh Ahh
Ting Tang
Walla Walla Bing Bang
Ooh Eeh Ooh Ahh AHh
Ting Tang
Walla Walla Bing Bang"

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 3:07 pm
No. 26 sar says:

em, that made me laugh so much harder than is becoming on a woman of my class

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 4:10 pm
No. 27 queencrone says:

I heard that Sarah Palin believes that if she chants "The power of three shall set you free"
over and over again, the evil investigators and the evil press will go away.

Or I have been watching Charmed reruns again.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 4:58 pm
No. 28 sar says:

qc, I'd love to see her guest spot as their mom.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 5:49 pm
No. 29 stopthemadness says:

::stands in front of mirror::

candyman
candyman
candyman

::looks around furtively::

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 6:23 pm
No. 30 queencrone says:

I think so too, sar. :-)

Or! 7th Heaven!!

Sarah P is trying to act like she is the mom in "7th Heaven-Alaska Style".

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 6:28 pm
No. 31 queencrone says:

STM, What happened when you chanted candyman three times?

I hope lots of snacks appear. I could use a candy bar. :-)

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 6:53 pm
No. 32 stopthemadness says:

em, i peed on the in and outside at that comment.

HA!

qc, i'm pretty sure a bunch of bees flew out of every orifice and that i'm now dead. But i can't be sure. let me check my pulse.

::eyes wide in shock::

i'm totally dead, y'all!

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 8:31 pm
No. 33 queencrone says:

Now see, I had NO IDEA what would happen if you chant candyman 3 times.

STM, you're just mostly dead. Eat this miracle covered in chocolate, and voila. You'll be fine. I've seen it work.

Anaphalatic shock can be a bitch.

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 9:36 pm
No. 34 queencrone says:

Also, I'd like to tell Mr. Muthee that traffic accidents are most usually caused by careless DRIVERS.

Nothing supernatural to see here folks. Move along.

This reminds me of that movie with Keri Russell, The Lottery. The archetype being, "find a scapegoat and blame all your problems on that."

Posted: Sep 17, 2008 at 11:41 pm
No. 35 just me says:

Sarah Pailin and John McCain are terrifying and I don't understand why so many people are voting for them. I know this country is racist but I don't want to believe that many people would not vote for Obama just because of his color. The past 8 years have been so destructive to this country what with wars, the economy,and the way other countries view us. How can we possibly survive if McCain/Pailin win this election? I'm terrified and ready to leave the U.S. if that happens. Please, everyone get out and VOTE and drag your friends with you! GO OBAMA!!

Posted: Sep 18, 2008 at 3:19 am
No. 36 TangerineSpeedo says:

Ready to leave the US - really? Will you be joining Alec Baldwin in his secret lair?

Posted: Sep 18, 2008 at 3:19 pm
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