FIRST!

This pains us. Really, it does. The video that we are bringing to you (after the jump) contains disturbing images of a disgusting sloth making out with his dog and farting on camera. Seems Perez Hilton had a little too much champagne at last night's VMAs and felt the urge to ramble about his thoughts, which included "YOU ARE PEREZ-CIOUS" and other inane phrases. Also, he got a little too excited about Jordin Sparks being "punk rock" and let out a gas explosion.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is why you shouldn't drink and vlog.
Scroll Posts



This is what happens when you attend finishing school in your Mom's basement.
My mom always said if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.
….. ……
*ahem*
…….
did he fart or did she just grumble?
He is like a pinker version of Ignatius J. Reilly.
my dog farted so loud right in the middle and i had to rewind becuase i didnt know if it was jackie or perez.
also - he should not vlog, period,
UR JUST JEALOUZ!! U WISH U CUD B LIKE PEREZ!!! PEREZ FOR PREZ!!
oh please oh please let denise15 show up today.
the word "vlog" makes me want to punch nerds in the face.
Exactly how I envisioned our modern-day answer to Truman Capote.
What ever happened to commentator rachel? She was quite the rabble rouser herself.
He managed to bore me more than Diddy. Oh I'm already bored from saying Di… lost interest.
Ugh! Why is this douchebag allowed on tv?
He is doing great with his diet though…
Killorn - that is cracking me up.
did he cut his hair with one of those vacume/hair cutting machine things?
deimos, nice flowby reference!
i don't know how to spell flowby. and frankly i don't give a crap.
I need to kill something.
He needs to lay off the alliā¢. I guess that is why he has so many wardrobe changes with him.
u r so right kitchy! get a life losers, because Perez is a swinging out sister with too many millions to count to worry about what you losers that need to get a life think. Jordan is such a cool sistah, AND THOSE BOYS ARE NOT GAY SO KNOCK IT OFF RIGHT NOW! For your information, I date a lot of guys like the Jonas bro's that dress real nice and have nice hair and they r saving themselves for marriage too! So there! THEY R NOT GAY!
ESPECIALLY NOT THE OLDEST ONE!
i think its flow-bee or something over-spelled like that
My head exploded from Milly's comment. Dont we have an age restriction here?
Sorry I dont mean to make a second spammy comment here but Perez going off about Jordin being Punk Rock - Somewhere in hell, Sid Vicious is killing himself again.
Aww, you gotta love Milly and her Hills rants…I didn't know she was a Jonas bro fan, creepy. At least she didn't give Speidi a shout-out, although anyone who defends Perez with such words frightens me.
I am oh so disappointed… no denise??? Bummer.
ps… Hey Hags!
Sugar Magnolia!! So nice to see you! :) I friended you on myspace like a year ago, and every now and then I see your name pop up and I want to go tell you, come back come back everybody's cool!
if rihanna is the new britney, how is britney going to make a comeback as..herself?
trashcan.
I think it was just where he was sitting. When I move on some stiff chairs my mom has that have some kind of leathery feel or plastic feel they make that noise too.