'cuse i look so haggard
'cus I come from alcholholism
'cus I am so friggin angry at the world
'cus my wife hates me

good for her 'cus she's no fun

Yea New Pornographers!
I say, my, my slow decent
Into alcoholism it went
To my head, where I really need it
With the views that remain untreated

Now it makes sense. Those haiku's weren't the work of a sober person. She must not have learned you never do the drunk call, drunk email, or drunk haiku. Nothing but embarrassment can come from it.

ha ha cause it is hard to lose weight wen drinking?! What the heck is "wen" drinking, some sort of ancient drinking ritual?

I love a good ritual. I'll bring the capes but can we not invite Rosie? You know how she thinks she can haiku when she's drunk.

It must also be hard to type "wen" drinking.

I love drunk haikuing. The haikus don't turn out well, but it's so much fun.

cause I can't stop writing crappy quatrains (not haikus). Lame anaphora, but please note the alliteration and consonance.

I suppose being drunk all the time does explain why she feels compelled to document her life in verse. Horrible verse, but verse, nonetheless.

Oh, Cord. I love you. You're the only one who makes me laugh so.

Sometimes that makes me want to cry.

That is all.

She's already killed her own career by being a fat ugly condescending bitch with no talent. Its just a matter of time before she is finally completely gone from the planet. Good riddance you fucking pi. Damn, I needs me a drink.

I bet her partner always wears the strap on.

Sobriety is overrated.