Once again, Amy Winehouse's husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, has proven that he's quite the catch: After being released from prison early on the condition that he stay off drugs and go to rehab, Blake Incarcerated is being shipped back to the big house for failing a drug test.
Upon hearing the news, the 26-year-old Casanova rushed to Amy's hospital bed (wait, we can't keep up — she's back in the hospital?) to beg for forgiveness. One can only assume his request was met with a bunch of grunts and a startled "Where am I?"
So now it's prison for Blakey Poo until 2010, which is quite a shame, because according to a source he would have been out for good next month had he not taken the original rehab option. Good thinking, B! Remember kids: Stay off the drugs.
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• Hands down, the greatest YouTube video ever created. [DListed]
• It always confuses us when celebrities neglect to shave their armpits when getting ready for the red carpet. [HT]
• Blake Incarcerated wants to do reality television to show Amy Winehouse "he is off drugs and loves her to bits." What could possibly go wrong? [INO]
• Everyone calm down! Lindsay Lohan confirmed on her blog that she is not breaking up with Samantha Ronson. [ICYDK]
• Oprah is taking hair advice from Britney Spears. [Yeeeah]
• Brad Pitt on parenting: "Six kids is not as easy as you would think." Wait, it's not a cakewalk? [PS]
Like the true Casanova he is, Blake Fielder-Civil admitted in a recent interview that he led Amy Winehouse down the cracked-out path of drugs and self-harm that she's still cruising down today.
I introduced her to heroin, crack cocaine and self-harming. I feel more than guilty. … I dragged Amy into it and without me there is no doubt that she would never have gone down that road. I ruined something beautiful. Now I have to let her go to save her life. I am not abandoning her. I am doing this out of love.
We can't decide whether to applaud him for recognizing his fault in this whole disaster or roll our eyes for taking the responsibility off Amy, who was a grown woman at the time this all began. Eh, we'll blame them both.
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AND BY 'MEDICATION' WE MEAN 'DRUGS' "Amy Winehouse is back in the hospital. The singer, 25, was admitted to the London Clinic on Sunday after a bad reaction to medication, her rep tells The Associated Press."
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• Guess who's posing for Playboy. [DListed]
• Amy Winehouse finally dumped Blake Incarcerated, but you know it won't last for long. [Yeeeah]
• Beyonce introduces the latest line of annoying celebrity eyewear. Kanye would be proud. [INO]
• For your viewing (dis)pleasure: All of last night's American Music Awards performances. [HT]
• Hollywood's newest (and prettiest) couple: Leonardo DiCaprio and Zac Efron. [PS]
• Suri Cruise is totally over the paparazzi. [ICYDK]
• Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are celebrating two years of their creepy, bizarre marriage. [DListed]
• Amy Winehouse's drug-filled beehive is back. Everyone can relax. [ICYDK]
• Mariah Carey knows how to get the pregnancy rumor mill churning: Cover up and touch your stomach. [PS]
• Jessica Simpson continues to mutilate her face. [HT]
• Twilight star Robert Pattinson is going to have some sort of nervous breakdown in the very near future. It's inevitable. [INO]
• Life is tough for Kim Kardashian. [Yeeeah]
Amy Winehouse was interviewed via intercom once again, presumably because nobody can bear to look at her grimy, cracked-out face without running away in fear, and she survived six whole minutes of questions without injuring herself or others. Progress!
Of course, her responses made absolutely no sense to anyone, sober or not. Seriously, wander outside around 2 a.m. and ask any drunk to decipher what Amy Winehouse says and even they won't have a clue. It's a mystery.
See if you can translate after the jump.
MEET WINEHOUSE'S NEWEST LOVE INTEREST • "Amy Winehouse has been secretly phoning and texting 16-year-old X Factor star Eoghan Quigg. The troubled singer even invited the innocent Northern Irish lad — her junior by nine years — to join her for a wild night on the tiles."
Amy Winehouse chatted up the paparazzi this morning and — oops! — forgot to install her disastrous beehive stashed with drugs, thus disproving our theory that she would look better without that rat's nest on top of her head. Instead, she appears just as lost and near-death as ever.
On another note: Check out the photo (after the jump) of her growling out her window at a passerby. Love her or hate her, we can all agree that she would be the most terrifying neighbor ever, right? CONTINUED »
• A live feed of puppies playing and sleeping in a box. It's one of the most adorable things we've ever seen. [DListed]
• Lisa Rinna admits to having too much work done on her face. Get out of town! Really? [INO]
• Helloooo Kate Hudson's brother. [ICYDK]
• Since when did Paris Hilton start morphing into Rebecca Romijn? [PS]
• An airline passenger was duct-taped to her seat after slapping a flight attendant on the rear and pulling a blind person's hair. Amy Winehouse? Is that you? [Yeeeah]
• Some bizarre photos of Lindsay Lohan from who knows when. [HT]
Today is a historic day, ladies and gentlemen. No, not because of the presidential election — Amy Winehouse's husband, Blake Incarcerated, was released from prison today.
Amy was busy slowly killing herself at her London home while the love of her life stepped back out into the world. She later appeared "in an agitated state … with make-up smeared across her face" as she lunged at a photographer. Business as usual.
Blake, however, didn't enjoy the taste of freedom for long — he checked straight into a rehab facility, per the terms of his release. The glorious, romance-filled reunion will have to wait.
• It's a good thing Joaquin Phoenix decided to retire from acting, because he needs to go back to school. [Yeeeah]
• Former Bachelorette/famewhore DeAnna Pappas has called off her reality show-inspired engagement. Who here is surprised by this? [ICYDK]
• We can't figure out if Enrique Iglesias is being insecure or realistic. [INO]
• A gallery of all the celebrity offspring dressed up in their Halloween costumes, because trick or treating is way more fun with the paparazzi in tow. [PS]
• Amanda Bynes spent too much time in the tanning booth. [HT]
• Amy Winehouse checked out of the hospital last week and checked back in today. Nothing to see here, folks. [DListed]
• Hilary Swank does a pretty spot-on Ellen DeGeneres impression. [ICYDK]
• Gerard Butler left Kate Hudson's Halloween party with two "sexy" vampires. Ugh. [INO]
• Mariah Carey's new music video could put toddlers to sleep in 5 seconds flat. [DListed]
• Cindy Crawford makes a great Amy Winehouse. [Yeeeah]
• Halle Berry's new haircut. Alert the media! [PS]
• Hugh Hefner's former Top Bunny before she made it big (pun intended). [HT]
Amy Winehouse is back! The more tragic (and British) version of Britney Spears has had an exciting past few days, including a bad move with London police and a trip to rehab, kinda. People are calling it rehab, but she's expected to be released within the week, so that doesn't make much sense.
Apparently police had summoned Amy to answer questions related to assault claims (she hit a female fan). Because she didn't show up, the authorities are threatening arrest — but we all know that's not going to happen. Instead, she did this:
Glassy-eyed and wearing a Hilda Odgen-style head-scarf, Amy was carted off cackling and grinning through stained teeth to her latest London clinic. … American pal Blake Wood helped her into the cab which ferried her away as she rolled around in the back.
The reason for her hospitalization? According to her enabler father, Mitch, she has a "chest infection." We're sure that's it.
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A reader commented yesterday on the mysterious absence of Amy Winehouse, optimistically chalking it up to a potential trip to rehab. Unfortunately for the world, we were wrong — she's just holed up in her home, granting bizarre interviews to French journalists over an intercom. She mainly talks about loving and missing her Blake Incarcerated and ends the interview by awkwardly suggesting everyone worry about themselves instead of Amy. Yeah, cause she's clearly got her life under control.
Because sometimes pictures simply aren't enough: Here's a bizarre video, shot by one of Amy Winehouse's "friends," which features the drug-addicted mess participating in a jam session. Except — oopsies! — Amy seems to have misplaced her shirt. Oh, well. She'll just dance like a chicken instead (around the 1:20 mark).
You can't keep a good woman down.
• Lindsay Lohan is a fan of the creepy Sarah Palin Halloween mask. Is Samantha Ronson going to dress up as a wolf? [Yeeeah]
• Eva Longoria says she's still a size 0, even though she got "fat." [ICYDK]
• Even when he's doing good deeds, Justin Timberlake comes across as a d-bag. [PS]
• Johnny Depp is Cosmopolitan's sexiest man alive, followed by George Clooney and … Jake Gyllenhaal? [INO]
• Amy Winehouse is now making coke-infused cotton candy. Good to see she's using her time wisely. [DListed]
• Innocent little Audrina Patridge is desperately trying to extend her 15 minutes of fame. [HT]
• Angelina Jolie has two new tattoos. Alert the media! [PS]
• Guess which two Hills idiots are hanging out again. [HT]
• Amy Winehouse's nose is falling off, but we'd say that's the least of her worries. [Yeeeah]
• Tom Cruise is a decent human being sometimes. Crazy, but decent. [INO]
• Speaking of Tom: He's working baby Suri to the bone, poor thing. [DListed]
• Fashion Week continues to make us scared and confused. Is that lady wearing pantyhose on her head? Is her body backwards? Nobody knows. [ICYDK]
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