SEX PLOTS COME TO THE FOREFRONT OF CULTURE "In the life-imitates-art department, there's no better example than David Duchovny, a real sex addict - he recently checked into rehab for sex addiction - who plays one in the Showtime series 'Californication.' … Yet Duchovny's show is not the only place where once underground practices are moving into the mainstream. Opening Friday is 'Choke,' … starring Sam Rockwell as a sex addict; George Clooney plays one for laughs in the recent 'Burn After Reading.' Writer-director Kevin Smith's 'Zack and Miri Make a Porno,' opening Oct. 31, tells of platonic friends … who raise money by starring in their own sex film. … Coming soon to the WE network are 'Secret Lives of Women: Sex Addicts' … and a new reality series, 'Sex Change Hospital.' CBS recently broadcast 'Swingtown,' a summer replacement series about swinging '70s couples. And really pushing the envelope is Palahniuk's latest novel, 'Snuff,' about an aging porn star determined to have sex with 600 men in a single day."
BECAUSE NOBODY HAS ANY ATTENTION SPAN ANYMORE "Universal is teaming with 'Wanted' director Timur Bekmambetov for … a reimagining of the classic [Moby Dick]. Variety reports that Universal paid high six figures to Adam Cooper and Bill Collage to pen the screenplay. The writers intend to change the structure of the revered novel … The changes will include depictions of the whale’s decimation of other ships prior to its encounter with Ahab’s Pequod. Further, Ahab will be portrayed more as a charismatic leader than a brooding obsessive. 'Our vision isn’t your grandfather’s ‘Moby Dick,’ ' Cooper told Variety. 'This is an opportunity to take a timeless classic and capitalize on the advances in visual effects to tell what at its core is an action-adventure revenge story.'"
So, you know how Sarah Palin tried to censor her local library while mayor of Wasilla, Alaska? Well, here's ABC News' report on the matter, including a bit about at least one of the books were of the gay variety.
• It's funny cause it's true. [Yeeeah]
• Lauren Conrad is going to be an author, because if there's anyone qualified to write a young adult novel, it's her. [PS]
• Janet Jackson's tour wardrobe. Umm, no. [ICYDK]
• Nobody needs to see up Jessica Simpson's skirt. [HT]
• Ellen DeGeneres uninvited over 100 people to her wedding. Ouch. [INO]
• Tara Reid is engaged. Poor guy. [DListed]
"Tori Spelling is no longer just a New York Times best-selling author. She is now a No. 1 New York Times best-selling author. On Sept. 14, her book, sTORI Telling, will move into first place on the prestigious newspaper's non-fiction list."
All those rumors about Lynne Spears' parenting book, Through the Storm, detailing Britney's sex life and drug use turned out to be false. Obviously. Lynne knows not to bite the hand that feeds her. But Britney, in a rare moment of wisdom, has still cut off contact with her mother:
While the book doesn't dish on Britney's sex life or drug use, it blames all of Britney's problems on her daughter's former managers. Spears — who already considered her mother a siphon on her purse — is 'upset' about the book, spies said, especially when she feels Lynne herself caused so many of her problems and issues.
We'd have to agree with Brit on this one; while we'd normally get onto her for not accepting part of the blame, it's not really a 14-year-old girl's responsibility to make sure her mother isn't whoring her out. And we applaud her for recognizing that Lynne is still doing just that.
[Source]
For the last few idiots left who look to Lynne Spears for parenting advice, consider this: The woman just leaked some of the "shocking" revelations from her new tell-all disguised as a celebrity parenting how-to in an effort to garner some publicity. The revelations include stories about Britney's sex life and drug and alcohol abuse, which would be surprising if the wise Road Kill Willie hadn't already spilled the beans.
Apparently Lynne claims that Britney began drinking alcohol at the age of 13, when she joined the Mickey Mouse Club. By 14, she had lost her virginity to an 18-year-old football player from her hometown, and by 15 she was taking drugs. Lynne details "the horror when Britney, just 16, was caught with cocaine and cannabis on a private jet." While Brit was the same age, Lynne allowed her to sleep with then-boyfriend Justin Timberlake because "Lynne thought Britney was in love and Justin was good for her."
So lessons learned? Lynne says she "regrets handing over control of Britney’s career to managers and allowing her daughter to be promoted as a sex object in raunchy videos at such a young age," which is basically saying, "I'm sorry those other people screwed up." Sounds like Mother of the Year to us.
[Source]
Lindsay Lohan's freak-sistah (not Ali) is getting a chance to tell her possibly-insightful story of growing up a real-life Tenenbaum. Samantha Ronson is in talks to pen a memoir about her life, and while everyone is freaking out that Samantha is using her relationship with LiLo to garner interest (she is), the DJ/club owner/child-of-a-socialite probably has some juicy niblets from her own life that don't involve Fire Crotch. Is Ronson a legitimate celebrity without Lindsay? No. But that's not usually a criteria for authors.
Best part of the whole book lead up?
PHELPS, GHOSTWRITER IN THE MONEY "Michael Phelps, winner of eight gold medals in Beijing and the man being hailed as the greatest Olympian of all time, … snagged an estimated $1.6 million advance from the Free Press imprint of Simon & Schuster for his latest book, to be called 'Built to Succeed.' Waxman Literary Agency, working with Phelps' long-time talent manager Peter Carlisle of Octagon, brokered the deal, which had a $1 million floor price just to get into the hunt."
Sean Connery's new autobiography, Being a Scot, was released today in the UK. The book finds the first and most famous Bond musing on "many aspects of Scottish culture and life, including sport, architecture, and of course the gothic tendency in Scots literature," while also offering enlightening anecdotes from his 78 years as a Scotsman. No word yet on whether Connery has used any part of Being a Scot to discuss under what circumstances a man can smack his lippy wife. In case he hasn't, we've got a brief video lesson after the jump.
CONTINUED »
IMBECILES PROTEST CHARACTERS USING MEAN WORD "Several dozen disability advocates converged in front of Monday night's Westwood premiere of 'Tropic Thunder' to protest the comedic use of the word retard. Chanting 'Ban the movie, ban the word,' marchers carried signs with such slogans as 'R-word = hate speech' and passed out flyers urging a boycott of the comedy. The DreamWorks film, which features Ben Stiller playing an actor best known for his role as a mentally challenged man in the ficticious drama 'Simple Jack,' has garnered a wave of criticism in recent weeks culminating with Monday's protest." Ban the word? Smells like fascism! Quick, everyone fire your commie friends' copies of Huckleberry Finn and To Kill a Mockingbird.
Five days, people, and the long-awaited, understandably mocked Lynne Spears memoir, Through the Storm, will be upon us.
The cover photo finds Spears, deliverer of Britney and Jamie Lynn, staring pensively out of a window, thinking on some unknown turbulence, surely considering how her daughters' money will help her carry on. And the tome's content is just as ridiculous.
CONTINUED »
IT RUNS IN THE FAMILY "Candy Spelling tells ET exclusively she's writing a book! 'It's true,' she says. 'I am close to signing a deal to write a book. But everyone should hold on. I have lots of stories I've never told, and they will all be in my book!'"
MALE-CENTRIC BOOK MOCKING FEMALE-CENTRIC BOOK TO MAKE MILLIONS "Warner Bros. has acquired rights to the book 'Drink, Play, F@#K,' the provocatively titled comedic male retort to the femme-centric best-seller 'Eat, Pray, Love.' The soon-to-be-published 'Play,' by comedy writer Andrew Gottlieb, tells the fictional story of Bob Sullivan, a man who, seeking solace after his wife leaves him, goes on a bender in Ireland, takes a gambling jaunt to Las Vegas and a embarks on a sex-tourism trip to Thailand."
Behold the official cover of Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's new book, Influence. It's about as creative as the book title, but at least we can't see what burlap sacks they're wearing. And we're not even going to attempt to figure out which twin is which.
Still following Madonna brother Chris Ciccone’s lengthy press tour? Well, we are, so suffer with us, will you?
After hitting up Good Morning America and Chelsea Lately to promote a tell-all about his singer sister, Ciccone now sits down — or, rather, has sat down — with the barely-there Page Six Magazine.
If you’re like us, you want to go straight to the end, so here it is, as told by a press release:
[Ciccone] knows the book won’t bring them closer together, and she’ll probably be furious. Christopher, however, is optimistic. 'Look, I don’t think the book is going to make us closer at this point,' he says. 'But when she reads it and finds out what I was going through and who I am as a person… well, I just don’t think anything bad can come of that.'
“When she reads it?” Oh, you dear, dear boy…
You probably don't want to revisit this, but remember when Dustin Diamond tried to get the public to help pay his mortgage by purchasing autographed T-shirts online? And then when that didn't work, he attempted to profit from starring in a sex tape? That was naturally followed by two stints on Celebrity Fit Club, and yet he still hasn't had enough public exposure.
So he's finally come up with a genius idea: a Saved by the Bell tell-all, appropriately titled Behind the Bell. Screech promises "sexual escapades among cast members, drug use, and hardcore partying." We'll be the first to admit it: We're going to purchase this book the day it's released.
We love watching Chelsea Handler conduct interviews because she always asks the questions that are on everyone else's minds and other reporters are afraid to ask. She invited Madonna's "short and paunchy" brother, Chris Ciccone, onto her show last night and immediately started the interview by asking, "Why did you throw your sister under a bus?" He proceeds to be as annoying as ever, but we actually sat through the entire segment, which is more than we can say about his stint on Good Morning America.
Editor
