As if it weren't already too much of a propaganda channel programmed to let us baby killers on the coasts cram our ideas of fun – fashion, haute cuisine, gays – down the throats of the red states, Bravo is now cooking up a show whose pomposity handily trumps Top Chef and Proj Run: "'Polo,' a docu-series about polo players and their significant others."
How exciting! Now, as the economy slows to a trickle, everyone with time to waste from losing their jobs can cozy up to their TVs and watch a show about young rich people in love who play a tremendously expensive game to the delight of older rich people. Doesn't that sound like your idea of fun? You'll finally be able to use "chukker" during Scrabble.
Oh who are we kidding, you won't be able to afford cable or Scrabble by the time Polo airs. Forget we mentioned it.
The Lifetime channel is making it very clear that it's sick and tired of being a punchline B-list comediennes use when talking about what they do when they get dumped or are on their periods.
First the network sneakily snatched away Bravo's trendy reality program Project Runway. Now it's delving even deeper into the hip fashion game with a new original reality series, Blush: The Search for the Next Great Makeup Artist. Because culture just doesn't celebrate the useless but moneymaking fashion industry enough!
Yet despite its similarities to shows like Runway and Shear Genius, Blush also promises to be quite different—it's going to be much, much worse. That's because it's basically a goddamn unabashed infomercial.
The ridiculous and accidental blockbuster popularity of MTV's Laguna Beach brought us The Hills, that reality show showcasing the lives of girls now too famous and wealthy to actually be the fictional versions they play on TV. And now that The Hills has performed the insurmountable task of keeping MTV semi-relevant, everybody else wants in. That's why Bravo is hunting for their own set of privileged West Coast youth and a production company is shooting a D.C. version as we speak. Even MTV, then, wants more of the magic. Enter The City, MTV's New York-based off-shoot of the show. Whereas The Hills took a group of pretty ladies from no-name status to insta-brands, The City will start off with a set of semi-known girls. Among them:
This, ladies and gentleman, is what's passing for a winning design on this dismal season of Project Runway. Yes, we know it was an outfit for drag queens, but come on!
An interesting theory we read on the Internets suggests that Bravo might be intentionally sabotaging Proj Run before it goes away to Lifetime, which is so catty and rude that it makes perfect sense when talking about a reality show about fashion. Discuss!
Ever since NBC Universal execs learned they would officially be losing Project Runway on Bravo, they’ve been working overtime to tear the brand apart. Why should they bother promoting a show that Harvey Weinstein ripped away from them to take to Lifetime, where he’s set to bag a bigger payday from production and product placement fees?
At first, the negativity was subtle. Bravo execs kept quiet as they stole Runway’s brilliant production team, Magical Elves, away from the show in an exclusive deal. And then the more obvious signs arrived.
Project Runway’s fifth season, and the last for Bravo, premieres on Wednesday. And by the time it arrives, and certainly by the time it wraps, its varnish will be worn, damaged, or gone altogether.
So just how is Bravo systematically sabotaging the Project Runway brand?
Forget the Crips and the Bloods: We have a new rivalry in America, and it's turning very ugly very quickly. At this week's Bravo A-List Awards, the Real Housewives from NYC and OC joined together to read a script during the ceremony. A bunch of she said/she said ensued, complete with actual claw marks:
'They [The OC Housewives] said in our material that my apartment is a two-by-four, and it’s actually a one-by-two, and so I can take it, I don’t care, [NYC housewife Bethenny] Frankel told People. 'But they’re offended that I’m saying something about them living 65 miles from the beach. [OC housewife] Jeana said, "I don’t think that’s funny."'
From there relations between the ladies apparently got extremely chilly. Jill Zarin from the NYC cast said, 'Bethenny gave a dressing down in the dressing room to one of the Housewives,' but OC cast member Tamra Barney tells the story differently.
Barney asserts that Frankel actually came after her physically: 'Bethenny scratched me a little bit. I swear to god. She tried to get me from behind and I put my arm up, and she scratched me. I covered it with makeup.' … Barney’s response? 'The Housewives of the OC can kick the Housewives of NYC’s ass!'
Oh, so is this how real housewives act? If that's the case, then someone needs to tell my mom, because she is obviously falling behind in the motherhood department.
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Our new favorite crazy, Lauren Hutton, gave a very eloquent and coherent speech at the Bravo A-List Awards, where she declared that she hadn't slept in 46 hours. We're sure it's not because of any substance abuse — she's just been really busy, what with her passionate Sex and the City rants and all.
It was a battle of the housewives at last night's Bravo A-List Awards as The Real Housewives of Orange County came Botoxed face-to-Botoxed face with The Real Housewives of New York City. We're obviously biased, so we'll allow you lovely readers to decide: Which coast won the red carpet?
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The Real Housewives of New York, that band of calloused tarts who won't realize how much life has passed them by until they're gasping on their deathbeds, are rumored to be hesitant to re-up their contracts with their Bravo reality show. Apparently, the filthy women are upset that Bravo paid them only $10,000 for their participation last season. A pittance, especially considering how labor intensive the show is.
The true slap to the NY Housewives' collective, painted face is that their equally contemptible counterparts, the Real Housewives of the OC, are paid $100,000. Life can be so unfair.
Rumor has it Bravo is expanding on its Real Housewives empire and adding the tackiest state ever into the mix:
Welcome to New Jersey, home to five of the Garden State's most affluent ladies and the families they run. These best friends do everything over-the-top, from their decorating, to their dating and their fighting. The Real Housewives of New Jersey showcases the McMansions and lavish lifestyles of these women and all the drama that money can buy.
It's safe to say this is the worst idea ever, no?
TIM GUNN GETS NO CREDIT "The Weinstein Co.'s decision to take Project Runway away from NBC Universal comes down to the same two factors that conspire to destroy every successful entertainment-industry relationship: money and ego. According to more than a half-dozen sources inside or close to both The Weinstein Co., which owns the show, and NBC, Harvey Weinstein felt that Bravo, which aired it, had 'always underpaid' for the show while 'taking all of the credit' for its success."
FIEEEEEEEEEERCE! "On Monday, the Weinstein Co., which produces Bravo signature series 'Project Runway,' said it was moving the show to Lifetime in a five-year deal, starting with its sixth season in November. Bravo parent company, NBC Universal, was not particularly pleased with the news and countered by filing a breach-of-contract lawsuit against the Weinstein Co. aimed at preventing 'Runway's' run to Lifetime."
Tim Gunn deals with a lot of divas as the mentor on Project Runway, but in a recent interview he revealed that he has been known to throw a diva tantrum from time to time.
His worst moment happened on the set of his show, Tim Gunn's Guide to Style. While filming a scene where he gives the subjects a copy of his book, Tim Gunn: A Guide to Quality, Taste and Style, he has a little run-in with a new director that results in a mild temper tantrum. And yet we still believe this man can do no wrong. CONTINUED »
Bravo released extra footage of Project Runway — just in time for tonight's finale — and this clip of Christian Siriano and Tim Gunn having a walk-off makes our heart smile.
Lesson of the day: For those of you aspiring to one day have the honor of sharing a table with a crazy right-wing Conservative and a woman who doesn't know if the Earth is flat or round, we have some advice. Don't piss off Barbara Walters.
Kathy Griffin was scheduled to appear on The View this morning, but at the last minute received a phone call from a producer saying she wasn't allowed on the show because she had been "too mean" to Barbara during her last Bravo special. Um, is that supposed to be considered a punishment?
When The View considers you to be too offensive, there's something wrong.
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NEW YORK, I LOVE YOU, BUT YOU'RE BRINGING ME DOWN "Bravo's reality show, 'The Real Housewives of Orange County,' is such a hit, they're doing an East Coast installment. 'Manhattan Moms' will star five New York mothers…It started shooting in the Hamptons last summer and in more local environs such as the Meatpacking District and the Upper East Side." Brooklyn wins again! Na zdrowie, Greenpoint.
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