Post gossip Cindy Adams on gastric bypass patient Carnie Wilson's upcoming autobiography:

THIS STAR HAS HAD QUITE A HEAVY LIFE

Rosie O'Donnell is taking her harrowing personal trials and turning them into a play. The as-yet-untitled project is a one-woman show and is already in rehearsals somewhere outside of New York.

Cindy Adams, the New York Post's craziest doting mother, says, "It's based on her life story - her first one. She's lived many lives." Certainly that sentence is more complicated than the play will be. Reserve your ticket now! (Yes, singular, you have to see something like this alone.)

Whoops! Remember when we told you Nicole Richie was seen puffing cancer sticks while with child? Turns out that was a lie perpetrated by some lunatic at the New York Post. Richie was in Thailand and Australia at the times in question, not New York. (Slight oversight!) That's the last time we trust anyone who still calls human beings "Oriental."