World famous pornographer Hugh Hefner, who's somehow convinced everyone that he's better than the common street pimps who do what he does, is being forced to can Playboy staffers in both New York and Los Angeles.
Since Hefner's once reputable magazine went from interviewing people like Malcolm X to interviewing people like Pete Wentz, and since anyone interested in masturbating to pictures now has the Internet for that, Playboy the brand has seen its stock fall precipitously, from $11.40 to $2.85.
This is just the latest blow to the 83-year-old Hef's empire, which has been in a rough patch for quite sometime now. Besides being turned down by falling starlet Lindsay Lohan, it's rumored that Playboy's notorious mansion parties have a tenuous future and that two out of three of Hef's girlfriends, Holly Madison and Kendra Wilkinson, have ditched him for younger men (magician Criss Angel and football player Hank Baskett, respectively).
Whaddya know? Women for whom one pays have no loyalty.
Update: Whoops! Page Six reports today that Hef's final girlfriend, Bridget Marquardt, is now dating Marisa Tomei's ex.
We won't spoil the five readers who watch So You Think You Can Dance because the main event of last night's finale had nothing to do with the results or contestants. Show regular Wade Robson choreographed a frightening number involving Cirque du Soleil and rabbits. Evidently the routine can be found in Criss Angel's Vegas show, if that tells you anything. But mainly, the entire piece gave me nightmares and ruined rabbits forever. (The clip starts around 2:45)
• Big Brother's new "soulmates" concept has turned into an STD fest. (Video NSFW) [DListed]
• Tina Fey will host the post-strike premiere of SNL. You remember SNL? Neither do we. We think it was an ancient show enjoyed by our forefathers. [CityRag]
• Kirstie Alley has stepped down as Jenny Craig's spokesperson. Presumably because Scientology does not believe in weight loss. [People]
• Jimmy Kimmel will get revenge by f***ing Ben Affleck. Can we get in on that? [Us]
• Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard: Classy and classier. [INO]
• For as much drama as Diddy gets himself into, he't not the best with excuses. [TMZ]
• Lindsay Lohan's whorish charms don't impress Clint Eastwood. [OK!]
• This girl has the mark of the beast. [BWE]
America's most famous married pornographers, Pamela Anderson and Rick Salomon, are said to be working on a new filmed project: a reality show for digital trough E!.
To describe the show, one "insider" says, "Think Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson's show, but with a crazier family life." Actually, we'd prefer to not!
And there we go! It took six months, but Paris Hilton has finally admitted that her prison time was a joke.
Because magic isn't real, this clip offers definitive proof that Mindfreak star Criss Angel now exploits dwarfs and people missing half their body so that others – normal others – can get cheap sight gags. Thereby making this the scariest thing he's ever done.
[Source]
From where does this fucking guy find the confidence it takes to leave the house looking like this?
Next time you're thinking a trip to Vegas might be fun, remember that this is what the VIP section looks like. Then self-flagellate for your foolishness.
After the jump, more from the grand opening of the LAX nightclub.
CONTINUED »
• Maury finally just putting the racism out there in front. [BWE]
• Ummmmm…that's the face for shock, happiness, depression and embarrassment. [DListed]
• Who's Audrina Patridge and why's her name not Andrea Partridge? [HT]
• Criss Angel explains the Britney Spears incident. Can he also explain the magic trick he's pulled that makes people think he's cool? [ICYDK]
• So many blonds, so little interest. [CityRag]
• Britney Spears' comeback performance will "shock" you. That's a good word to use when one can't honestly say "be good." "Entertain" also would have worked. [Yeeeah]
Who was most predictable here: Criss Angel, Britney Spears or TMZ?
• OK, that explains the Cameron thing, but you've still not given us any idea as to why you dress like this. [DListed]
• She's coming at it more like frat house arrest. [Gawker]
• What's Bob going to do now that he can't fondle the Barker Beauties behind the Plinko board? [BWE]
• Rose McGowan's not yet fully wilted. [HT]
• A Rod is definitely a rod. [Jossip]
• Once and for all: she did "spread 'em." [Yeeeah]
• More fallout from the Paris decision. [ICYDK]
• Bruce Willis says he has smoked pot in the past. Weird. I would have thought he liked yippie-kay-yayo, motherfucker. [CityRag]
Criss Angel, whose style of dress suggests that he doesn't know people think magicians are fucking corny, recently sent a very public message of love and support to new girlfriend Cameron Diaz. The declaration was made atop a tower of scaffolding, and it followed Angel's latest, grandiose magic trick (Ooooooohhhhhhh, aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!). Us has the scoop:
Angel gave a shout-out to his “new girl” Cameron Diaz before he was enclosed for 24 hours in a clear box encased in cement for the ultimate daredevil stunt in NYC’s Times Square.
Just minutes before the cement box closed around him at 7:30 a.m., Angel, 39, announced, “This is dedicated to my new girl. You know who you are. I’ll be thinking of you.”
Says a source, “He didn’t mention her by name, but everyone knew who he was talking about.”
The box was then hoisted 40 feet above the ground, and was scheduled to plummet to the earth exactly 24 hours later.
The following morning, hundreds of fans gathered to watch his escape and a big screen showed Angel inside the box, kicking at the walls and dejectedly holding his head in his hands. When a countdown clock hit zero, the box was sent plunging to the ground, without anyone seeing him emerge.
People magazine is reporting that Cameron Diaz has conjured up a new love interest, "magician" Criss Angel (nee Christopher Nicholas Sarantakos of East Meadow, New York), whose biggest trick yet—aside from making his ethnic name disappear—was creating himself out of the band Savage Garden and what Anne Rice fans think vampires look like.
Over the past few days Cameron and Criss have been spotted together at various events around Las Vegas.
The pair began their evening with dinner at the Bellagio's Prime steakhouse, then rode to the Mirage in Angel's Rolls Royce for the 10:30 p.m. performance of Cirque du Soleil's Beatles tribute LOVE.
The smiling duo walked arm-in-arm into the theater through the main entrance, and throughout the show, a witness tells PEOPLE, "They were snuggling with each other and he was making her laugh. They seemed really happy."
Diaz and Angel, who has been linked to Minnie Driver, previously met up on Saturday night at the VH1 Rock Honors and later partied at the Jet Nightclub with Diaz's BFF Drew Barrymore. Diaz had been scheduled to leave Las Vegas on Sunday with her friends, sources tell PEOPLE, but decided to extend her stay through Tuesday.
This relationship really is like magic: boring after five seconds and fake.
Editor
