David Letterman, still irked that John McCain chose to go on Katie Couric instead of his show, calls up the perky CBS news anchor and demands an explanation. Her excuse? McCain never mentioned that he was supposed to be on The Late Show.
What a liar! Also, keep ridin' that zeitgeist, Dave!
Our favorite Baldwin brother, Alec, chatted with David Letterman last night about his stint on SNL with national joke Sarah Palin. He has great things to say about the lady, although he admits he doesn't want "her hand on the nuclear button." Sounds like someone's been talking to Matt Damon.
He also shows off his not-as-good-as-Tina Fey Palin impression and reminds us how senile his Bible thumping brother, Stephen, has truly become.
David Letterman's disdain for the guests his job requires him to interview is becoming less and less subtle, and it's an absolutely glorious thing to behold.
After the jump, watch as Letterman uses Hills star Lauren Conrad's promotional rambling to sell his book and presents her with the theory that maybe she's the reason people hate her. The host also takes some time to go off on LC's mortal enemy, Spencer Pratt. Enjoy.
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Well! Now we know why John McCain wormed out of his first David Letterman appearance to instead attend a televised chat with Katie Couric. Because David Letterman, y'know, actually asks questions people on TV without backing bands are supposed to ask.
For instance, after grilling the senator on his incessant whining about Barack Obama's gossamer "connection" to Bill Ayers, Letterman then asks, "Did you not have a relationship with Gordon Liddy?" (Liddy, of course, is the scuzzy ex-con who broke into the DNC headquarters in 1972, thus beginning the Watergate scandal.) And guess what? McCain is buddies with both rotten Liddy and his son! Hahaha! He doesn't even try to pretend he's not a hypocrite.
Other greatest hits of the video below include McCain joking about how he asked his Marine son in Iraq to send him his body armor for his Late Show interview, because talking to a comedian was going to be harder than facing roadside bombs day in and day out, and the part when McCain is like, "I haven't been tortured this bad since I was tortured in a Vietnamese prison!" Heyo! So weird.
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Riff is going to the dance to make nice with Bernardo, so this Thursday America will be able to witness the ultimate mambo as John McCain makes his long-awaited appearance (probably) on The Late Show with David Letterman. Unless he backs out again, of course.
The question is: Will Letterman take the Bill O'Reilly route and go all soft and sweet once he has his opponent in the chair? Or will he continue to berate McCain and hope the audience he's already lost during the debacle is less than the numbers he's bringing in for his on-air beat-down? Let's take a look at the McCain/Letterman time-line and place our bets accordingly:
David Letterman recently took time from trouncing all over the mavericky reputation of noted liar John McCain to earnestly beatify his recently deceased friend, Paul Newman. According to Letterman, who raced cars with Newman for years, the actor lived life in the best way possible: "He took care of other people."
The always well-spoken and put-together Anne Hathaway stopped in to chat with David Letterman last night about her new movie, Rachel Getting Married, and — oh yeah — her con artist of an ex-boyfriend. Despite Dave's peppering tactics, Anne managed to make it through the interview with some humor and without sounding like too much of an ass. Sure, she gets a little sarcastic from time to time, but she actually speaks about the situation without the typical "no comment." Paris, are you taking notes?
YOUTUBE CONTINUES DESTROYING TELEVISION "John McCain's snub of David Letterman last week may have deprived the 'Late Show' host of some needed star power last week, but it's given him a hit on the web. So far, video of Mr. Letterman's tirade against Mr. McCain, who bowed out the day of the telecast, has generated more than 3.5 million views on YouTube. One problem: CBS is barely making a dime from the clip. That's because the vast majority of the views — 3.2 million — are attributed to pirated versions of the 'Late Show,' according to tracking firm TubeMogul."
This whole feud between David Letterman and John McCain remained entertaining for the second day in a row after Dave found out even more damning evidence: Upon canceling his Late Show appearance Wednesday to rush to the aid of the dying economy, Johnny boy not only stopped off to visit with Katie Couric — he stayed in New York City until Thursday morning. Now there's a man in a hurry.
Letterman summed it up by admitting he felt like an ugly date: "I feel used. I feel cheap. I feel sullied. I feel cratered." John McCain has that effect on us, too, Dave.
The lesson of this nine-minute excerpt from last night's Late Show? Don't cancel on David Letterman at the last minute with the a bald-faced lie. He will show a clip of your lying ass planted firmly in makeup chair several hundred miles away from where you said you'd be.
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Last night, the increasingly insufferable Bill Clinton guested on David Letterman's Late Show, where he reminded everyone that his wife was also a good presidential candidate before complimenting Barack Obama – "the other way" in Bubba-speak – in the most backhanded ways possible.
Letterman didn't call Bill on his bullshit at all, which is unfortunate, but that's what made it extra satisfying when Chris Rock did.
Click through to watch Letterman squirm with the knowledge that Clinton and his people are backstage hearing every word of Rock's roast.
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Richard Simmons must have heard us talking about him last week, because the fitness guru was spotted outside the Late Show with David Letterman yesterday filming for Friday night's program. We would tell you to set your DVRs, but you already know exactly what's going to happen on the show. And it's not going to be pretty.
[Source]
Richard Simmons descended upon Capitol Hill to fight childhood obesity with a happy dance and emotional plea. We're sure his cause is a worthy one, but every time we look at him we can't help but be reminded of all his stints on David Letterman. Click through for two of our favorites (and you can watch Richard's Capitol Hill speech here).
You knew Spencer Pratt would have something to say after Mary-Kate Olsen and David Letterman discussed his weasel-like qualities, and boy is his response a doozy:
I don't really get why she'd use my name to get press for her little indie film that no one's going to see. She should probably focus more on not getting dressed in the dark than on me.
I know I've made it in Hollywood when a famous troll is talking about me on Letterman. I forgive her, though. She's had to go through life as the less cute twin, which must be tough.
How big of you, Spence. It's a shame nobody can forgive you for going through life as the biggest d-bag in America.
[Source]
Oh, Olsen twins, why don't you like food?
An exhausted Mary Kate Olsen – sans sister and a rubicund glow – stopped by Letterman last night to discuss being tired, being exhausted and Spencer Pratt, all while tiredly, exhaustedly hunching over. If nothing more, it was an exhibition of what a body is like when not it is not functioning properly.
You can imagine how quietly Letterman, whose tolerance for bullshit is the lowest on late night television, suffered the fool's behavior.
David Letterman must really enjoy the movie Hancock: In the past week, he's had Jason Bateman, Will Smith and now Charlize Theron on his show. Charlize, whom we love, was the proud owner of the most bizarre interview, which was so disjointed and uncomfortable it beat out the weird Dave/Will kiss from the night before. At the end of the interview, Charlize joked about being drunk — and we really do hope alcohol is to blame, because if not, her jokes make for painful situations. CONTINUED »
• I don't know who's luckier: Will Smith or David Letterman? [Celebitchy]
• Jessica Alba's new baby glow hasn't made her any less of a Debbie Downer. [PS]
• After years of putting up with Denise Richards, Heather Locklear has entered a treatment facility to assist with psychological issues. It's about time. [DListed]
• DMX was arrested for the third time in two months. Don Imus, care to comment? [ICYDK]
• Chris Brown's mother confirms Hollywood's worst kept secret. [INO]
If there's one celebrity who needs to cross over into the music business, it's Jason Bateman. The man whom we will always refer to as Michael Bluth visited David Letterman last night and sang what will surely be one of the summer's hottest tunes. We won't give much away, but it's about poopy diapers and it's sung to the tune of "Take Me Out to the Ballgame." The man truly is a genius. CONTINUED »
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