• I know people say things like this every election year, but – no shit – if Fred Thompson wins the presidency and America's First Lady has breast implants, I'm getting the hell outta here. [Jossip]

• I'm sure David Letterman is upset about his Paris Hilton-free future. Broken hearted, even. [DListed]

• Literally two seconds ago someone in the office told me this girl might be what we in the know call a "beard." I dunno about that, but do with it what you will. [Yeeeah]

• Bam Margera finally speaks up about his relationship with Jessica Simpson, and just as his career is on a decline. Imagine that. [ICYDK]

• Cash back. [INO]

• Why isn't this girl part of the Heidi and LC and Spencer and Sleepy and Shitty and Whitey feud? [HT]

• Brooklyn wins! Enjoy your Manhattan megamall, yuppies! [CityRag]

Of course, not everyone has the luxury of being able to step over Fashion Week as if it were an errant mess on a city sidewalk. Occasionally, notable people are present for – and even active participants in – the clamorous, glamorous hubbub. To these precious few (or is it gullible many) we briefly offer our attention and pity.

Is it a peace sign or is it how many Chinese babies died to make the leather for her purse? Either way, it's happening in the front row of Vera Wang, and we've got the action after the jump.

CONTINUED »

• This video above is why HBO will never, ever be better than your local public access channel. Ever. [Viceland]

• Beckham nudie shoot or Photoshop? Keep in mind that statistics do give credibility to the uncircumcised penis. [DListed]

• Letterman's widely known for his tough questions. [DH]

• CMT Awards go off as planned as "nu country" continues to shame Johnny Cash and Merle Haggard. [Glitterati]

• Jessica out with the girls. Question: Why do women with big boobs think it's funny to call them "the girls"? [HT]

• Everyone's leaving the tranquil, healthy work environment that is Grey's Anatomy. Weird. [INO]

• For some reason, Scientology practitioners learn to put an inordinate amount of hubris behind their ignorance. [AB]

Soo, what Jim Carrey was saying is that he was planning on raping a few strangers on New Years 2000? Er, wonder how that went. Awwwwkwaarrddd.

Fine, well, if I can't get a real guide pony (I suppose I don't need one) I'm expecting a whole fleet (pack? brood?) of these little guys. I need some friends.

Matt Damon did a funny impression of Matthew McConaughey on Letterman last night. Unforch, there were no bongos to really pull the scene together.

[Source]

Britney Spears made a brief surprise visit to David Lettermen last night. She wasn't really promoting anything other than her new bod, not even Kevin's album…and she doesn't have what one would call comedic timing…but she did look pretty cute. Even in a one piece jumpsuit skirt/shorts thing. These pictures don't do the outfit's oddness justice. In any event, it looks like she's gearing up for that comeback? She does have three babies (two little ones, one big one) to feed.

Update: Here is the video. No word as to what she was wearing on her feet, but I'll hazard a guess as platform flip flops.

[Source]

Most. Awkward. Interview. Ever.

Lord knows how Nicky Hilton finagled her way onto Letterman, but it sure was uncomfortable while she was there. In what I assume were possibly the longest 9 minutes of his life, Dave tried to get an ounce of personality or humor out of Nicky, to no avail. Girl couldn't even execute the story I'm sure they prearranged to tell about borrowing a necklace from her mother. So, so bad.