Denise Richards dragged her more likable by default sister out to celebrate Tao's three year anniversary party in Las Vegas over the weekend. Giving her a run for her money in the insufferable competition were Ellen Pompeo, Holly Montag and Perez Hilton. If we were to be stuck on a stranded island with any of them, we can't decide who would be the least maddening. Feel free to choose for yourself.
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It's been barely a week since news broke that Lindsay Lohan's guest stint on Ugly Betty was cut short due to drama on the set, and now she has another botched job on her hands: She's been cut from hosting the World Music Awards in Monaco next weekend.
Apparently the walking disaster hosted the WMAs in 2006, when she proceeded to screw up her lines and call Beyonce to the stage while the singer was still getting her hair done. The producers had a mild case of amnesia and decided the "actress" was so "hot" at the moment that she would be the perfect host. They called in former Desperate Housewives tool Jesse Metcalfe for backup, but LiLo threw a fit because the spotlight wouldn't be totally on her.
In the end, "it was decided by both parties it was better if she pulled out," which means the producers wised up and Lindsay pouted and acted like she didn't want to host the awards in the first place.
Her replacement? Denise Richards. Yeah, that's a step up.
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DENISE RICHARDS: SHE WAS RIGHT "Denise Richards is coming back to the small screen! Her E! reality series, Denise Richards: It's Complicated, has been picked up for a second season, the network confirmed Wednesday. An official network nod comes more than a month after Richards herself told Usmagazine.com the show would return."
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You may recall our celebratory post a few weeks back when it was reported that Denise Richards' dreadful reality show was canceled. We spoke too soon.
According to Denise, "it's coming back for another season" and they will begin filming in a few months. This confirms it: Despite the glorious savior Joel McHale, E! truly has absolutely not taste whatsoever. And this is coming from someone who can stomach a lot of bad television.
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Sad news for Denise Richards and Joel McHale, good news for the rest of us: Denise Richards [colon] It's Complicated has officially been canceled. Turns out even E! wasn't desperate enough to keep the unlikeable mother of two on the air. And we can't blame the network: We sit through a lot of reality TV, but this show was just plain unwatchable.
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• One of the fattest cats in America, who was abandoned in New Jersey, found a home. Aww. [DListed]
• Pink has some harsh words — via song — for ex Corey Hart. [INO]
• Kim Kardashian takes a break from her hard life to be photographed at the beach. [Yeeeah]
• Denise Richards' reality show may not come back for a second season. We weren't even aware someone was stupid enough to consider it. [ICYDK]
• Who hasn't seen Lindsay Lohan's funbags? [HT]
• Seal and Heidi Klum's family vacation is cuter than yours. [PS]
Every week, a bunch of “real” people say really stupid things on reality TV. These are their stories.
10. "I am going to fight with everything that is from toe to head of me." — Jessie, Big Brother
The Hogans have this weird disorder where they cry for sympathy and privacy and yet constantly seek out the media to further embarrass themselves. Denise Richards suffers from the same affliction, as do half the famewhores in Hollywood. Nothing newsworthy has been happening in the family lately — Nick's still in jail, Brooke's still parading her stupidity on television, Hulk and Linda are still divorcing — but the patriarch just has to talk to Us Weekly, this time about his estranged wife:
Without a doubt, this one is the most formidable opponent I’ve ever run into. You talk about dirty tricks: Brass knuckles, steel knuckles, cheap shots, tripping people up. I’ve never seen anybody in the wrestling business that has more dirty tricks than she does! I guess I taught her well.
Well, that most certainly wasn't a waste of time. Thanks, Hulk.
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• Jessica Simpson's father threatens Dallas Cowboys fans around the country: "She's coming to the games this year, so you better get ready. She's a fan from the beginning to the end." Or until she gets dumped. [PS]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are considering asking Bono to be the godfather to the holy twins, which pretty much seals those kids' fate in rehab. [INO]
• Denise Richards is still campaigning to win the title of Most Vile Person Ever. [DListed]
• Lindsay Lohan was hit by a motorcycle over the weekend in NYC. There were no injuries, but father Michael still felt the urge to blab about it to every media outlet who would listen. [Yeeeah]
• Britney Spears is on vacation — but has yet to learn how to escape the paparazzi. [HT]
• Desperation: Madonna and Guy Ritchie will renew their wedding vows in a pathetic attempt to shoot down those pesky divorce rumors. [ICYDK]
Rarely am I unable to sit through a reality television show, but Denise Richards: It's Complicated excelled at being both obnoxious and incredibly boring. I gave up midway through the season but tuned in for last night's finale thanks to E!'s promos featuring some big "controversy" that plagued Denise. So here's what happened: While on her press tour promoting the reality show, every interviewer had the nerve to ask about her personal life and decision to parade her children in front of the cameras. Um, Denise? What did you expect them to talk about? Your show is all about your personal life. And don't get us started on how she brings all of this negative press upon herself while hypocritically complaining about how she just wants to be left alone.
Praise Xenu this nonsense is over. (It is over, right? Please tell me there's not a second season in the works.)
WHAT COULD BE WORSE THAN REALITY TV CAMERAS? "Denise Richards went to court this morning, asking the custody judge for an emergency order restricting Charlie [Sheen]'s access to their kids. … We're told they told the judge there's a serious issue in Charlie's home that could have an adverse impact on the kids."
Last night's episode Denise Richards: It's Complicated was even more annoying than usual thanks to her 30 minutes of whining that she is "f–king fat." Naturally, she spent the entire episode complaining about her weight and trying to get rid of all of her "hideous" rolls. Because that's how you make America fall in love with you: By making everyone else feel obese.
• A reason to love New York City's subway system. [CityRag]
• Amy Winehouse punched someone for the third time in less than two weeks. At this point, it's just humorous. [Yeeeah]
• Why is Jessica Alba sucking up to Justin Timberlake? [INO]
• More proof Steve Carell is a good guy. [PS]
• Denise Richards' neighbors are trying to force her out due to the media circus brought about by her reality show. Also, because she's a miserable shrew. [ICYDK]
• Always wanted to see Brigitte Nielsen get plastic surgery? No? Well, too bad. [DListed]
Denise Richards has received quite a bit of negative publicity in recent years for her inability to act like a decent human being, but now she has taken to her favorite tabloid to brag about what a great mother she has become. In fact, she's so selfless, she put her children in therapy! … And then announced it to the entire world.
My kids are in therapy. It’s very sad that they need to be there, but they do for now. On the other hand, it’s good they have an outlet to deal with their feelings and someone who is just their advocate.
Yes, that is good, Denise. If only the girls had an advocate who lived with them and cared for them full-time — let's just call this person a "mother" — who isn't busy blabbing about her children's personal lives to In Touch.
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• I don't know who's luckier: Will Smith or David Letterman? [Celebitchy]
• Jessica Alba's new baby glow hasn't made her any less of a Debbie Downer. [PS]
• After years of putting up with Denise Richards, Heather Locklear has entered a treatment facility to assist with psychological issues. It's about time. [DListed]
• DMX was arrested for the third time in two months. Don Imus, care to comment? [ICYDK]
• Chris Brown's mother confirms Hollywood's worst kept secret. [INO]
Charlie Sheen has apologized to "all [he] obviously offended" by calling his ex-wife, Denise Richards, a "fucking nigger" in a swear-heavy rant he left on her voicemail three years ago. Despite its age, Richards released the recording, in which Sheen also labels her a "fucking cunt," presumably because she is a spiteful, spiteful person.
Sheen sent out a special acknowledgment to Tony Todd, his black friend, best man for two weddings and THE Candyman. Sheen star offered no message of peace to cunts.
After the jump, a clip of the scariest yet greatest groomsman in the history of nuptials.
CONTINUED »
Every week, a bunch of “real” people say really stupid things on reality TV. These are their stories.
10. "We have to educate him in this whole tabloidism." — Dina, Living Lohan
• On last night's Denise Richards: It's Complicated, our heroine got into an argument with a reporter and proved why she should be America's Sweetheart. Think of the children! [DListed]
• Barack Obama's resignation from Trinity Church: Your thoughts. [SH]
• Seth Rogen may or may not have smoked weed onstage at the MTV Movie Awards. Of course he did. [Us]
• Britney Spears pulled out of a deal to promote a line of imported furniture because Jamie was afraid Brit was just being used for publicity. Which … is kind of the point, no? [PS]
• The obviously sober Amy Winehouse on her husband, Blake Incarcerated: “He’s gorgeous as f–k. Haven’t you seen him before?” [ICYDK]
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