• Heartwarming animal-related video of the day: A dog gets hit by a car and another dog rushes out to rescue it. Don't worry, everyone reportedly survived. [DListed]

• One of Victoria Beckham's proudest accomplishments: "I have started smiling. I've mastered this smirk; it's a smile that isn't a smile." [PS]

• Brooke Hogan looking classy as usual. [ICYDK]

• Marilyn Manson has a new, wholesome girlfriend to take home to mom. [INO]

• The Internet's three greatest achievements (hint: LOLcats included). [CityRag]

• Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag's totally candid honeymoon photos. Ah, romance. [Yeeeah]

Katie Couric must have left Courtney Love's cocker spaniel pictures at home when she visited the hair salon, because she came out looking like a Hillary Clinton-esque pixie instead. The CBS news anchor debuted her new hairstyle on last night's broadcast, and we're going to go out on a limb and predict that it won't boost the ratings.

We're packing up and calling it a day, partly because we enjoy time off, too, and partly because most of you lovely readers are off gallivanting around your hometowns in search of the perfect turkey for the big day. We'll be back after the holiday, but until then, warm wishes to you and yours.

Thank heavens for my old freshman year roommate, who saved me from my future Puppy Cam depression with this new link: Puppy Stalker. It's like the old puppy cam, but four times the fun, so you can be four times the slacker during work hours.

You're welcome.

Here we go, I'm just ripping the band-aid off as quickly and painlessly as possible: The puppy cam is ending. Take a minute, sit down, dry the tears from your eyes and get it together. We need to be strong during the puppies' final days. Apparently the precious bundles of joy are growing up and will be going to their new homes over the next few weeks, so mark your calendars: In less than a month, you can return to being productive at work instead of just blankly staring at your computer screen all day while letting out the occasional "Aww!"

Life will never be the same.

We can all agree that Jonathan Knight from New Kids on the Block is definitely gay, right? I mean, the signs are all there: He's the only member of the group who's not married, I had a crush on him when I was younger and Perez Hilton has already outed him. Now he's just toying with us by updating the NKOTB blog with a long, rambling entry about the only woman in his life: his dog. It's disturbing, awkward and not funny in the least (and after the jump).

Take some notes from Lance Bass and then get back to us, J.

CONTINUED »

• That precious puppy cam is taking the world by storm. [DListed]

• Kanye West was arrested for assaulting a paparazzo. No, this isn't news from a couple months ago — it actually happened again. [INO]

• The Jonas Brothers make normal feuds sleep-inducing. Where are the train wrecks? [Yeeeah]

• Hilary Duff will be returning to our television screens in the near future. Well, at least she's no longer trying to sing. [ICYDK]

• Don't make a kissy face at us, Beyonce. [CityRag]

• Is it really necessary to show off this celebrity butt crack? [PS]

• The world's ugliest dog has passed on to the great kennel in the sky. [DListed]

• Tim Robbins had polling problems on election day, but they were all his own damn fault. [Yeeeah]

• Janet Jackson is way too busy canceling her tour to have children. [INO]

• Brooke Hogan: Still classy. [HT]

• Who in the hell invited Tyra Banks to the Glamour Women of the Year ceremony? [PS]

• Christina Aguilera has some really unfortunate-looking bangs. [ICYDK]

• A live feed of puppies playing and sleeping in a box. It's one of the most adorable things we've ever seen. [DListed]

• Lisa Rinna admits to having too much work done on her face. Get out of town! Really? [INO]

• Helloooo Kate Hudson's brother. [ICYDK]

• Since when did Paris Hilton start morphing into Rebecca Romijn? [PS]

• An airline passenger was duct-taped to her seat after slapping a flight attendant on the rear and pulling a blind person's hair. Amy Winehouse? Is that you? [Yeeeah]

• Some bizarre photos of Lindsay Lohan from who knows when. [HT]

• Some classy lady found herself desperate enough to marry Corey Haim. [DListed]

• Michael Jackson doesn't need a costume for Halloween. [INO]

• Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson take the subway. They're still not at all like us. [PS]

• These photos of Rachel Bilson and her dog are so cute they may be able to end the war in Iraq. [HT]

• Mariah Carey is a beauty school dropout. That explains a lot. [ICYDK]

• Angelina Jolie may be jealous of Diane Kruger, Brad Pitt's newest co-star. Because that makes sense. [Yeeeah]

We always knew people obsessed with their pets were sort of out there, but who knew they have nutty, dog lover hallucinations? How else to explain the fact that these are the WINNERS of a nationwide search for dogs that look like Barack Obama and John McCain? Huh? Are these seeing eye dogs?

We'll give the judges the benefit of the doubt and assume that the McCain dog is grouchy and the Obama mutt barks poetry.

SLOW NEWS DAY OVER HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JONAS BROS JUMP THE GASSY DOG "Another hot Disney Channel act is poised to make a bigscreen splash — at 20th Century Fox. Fox has locked the Jonas Brothers to make their feature starring debut in 'Walter the Farting Dog.' Based on a bestselling series of books by William Kotzwinkle and Glenn Murray, the film is being adapted by Alec Sokolow and Joel Cohen into a family film that will revolve around Nick, Joe and Kevin Jonas, as well as their younger brother Frankie. … The title character in the 'Walter' books is a fat dog with severe flatulence. The brothers play musicians whose parents are asked to care for the dog by an aunt just before she passes away."

• Because you can never have too many heartwarming tales involving animals. [DListed]

• Something's off with Nicole Richie's body proportions. [HT]

• Pink says she's "proud" to be mistaken for a lesbian: "I don’t care. I love to challenge people’s preconceptions." Fair enough. [Yeeeah]

• The "Izzie's getting killed off of Grey's Anatomy!" rumors are making a comeback. We're still on board with anything involving less Katherine Heigl. [ICYDK]

• Jennifer Aniston sinks her claws back into Gerard Butler. Why can't everyone just leave G.But alone? [PS]

• Paris Hilton and Benji Madden have a rule stating they can't go more than a week without seeing each other. It's similar to Paris' other rule that she can't go a day without being photographed. [INO]

Here's an event we can get behind: The ASPCA Shaggy Dog Gala, held last night in NYC, managed to support the animals without dressing them up in humiliating outfits and forcing them to parade down a runway. Sure, Katie Lee Joel's dog's collar is a little much, but our standards have been lowered when it comes to pet decor.

Among the no-names in attendance: Former Bachelor Lorenzo Borghese (swoon), Lake Bell, Kristen Johnson and The Real Housewives of New York City's Ramona Singer. Good work, people: Keep the clothes off the animals.

[Source]

So Whitney, your fearless associate editor, and Michael Phelps, America's latest obsession, gathered in the same room last night and nobody died. That, in itself, is a victory. Nobody got engaged either, which is a slight failure, but the entire evening was one of the best nights of my life, so I'm not sad. Well, maybe a little.

CONTINUED »

• How long until Paris Hilton gets herself one of these monkey servants? [DListed]

• The hardest working dog in Hollywood is also likely covered in STDs, poor thing. [HT]

• Miley Cyrus' dad approves of his 15-year-old daughter's 20-year-old boyfriend. But if we've learned anything, it's that Billy Ray doesn't exactly exercise the best judgment. [INO]

• You were right: We can no longer tell Mary-Kate and Ashley apart. [PS]

• The Brangelina children love Cheetos, y'all. Britney would be proud. [ICYDK]

• Courtney Love had gastric bypass surgery. Um, did she need it? [Yeeeah]

• Brooke Hogan: The epitome of class. [Yeeeah]

• Charlize Theron tells guests in her home looking for the bathroom to "take a left at the Oscar." That's actually kind of awesome. [INO]

• Maggie Gyllenhaal looks … tired. [ICYDK]

• Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal are sad because they have a long-distance relationship. You know what else is sad? When people can't afford to fly to see their families. Man up, you two. [PS]

• Britney Spears' sad attempt to disguise herself from the paparazzi. [DListed]

• Not as adorable as Rupert, but this little puppy will have to do for now. [CityRag]

[Source]

• Aubrey O'Day's dog was probably better off at the shelter. [DListed]

• Good news! Hollywood has come up with yet another unhealthy way to lose weight. [INO]

• Photos of Heather Locklear's arrest. She still looks crazy. [CityRag]

• Amy Winehouse went crazy and attacked some people. So basically, a typical weekend. [Yeeeah]

• Dennis Quaid is disgusted with Meg Ryan and her need for attention. [ICYDK]

• Katie Holmes has lost all of her attractiveness — now she's just plan scary. How sad. [PS]

[Source]