• So is Perez Hilton a 10-year-old girl or just a "cunt"? [YouTube]

• Our new hero: "Senator Ernie Chambers of Nebraska filed a lawsuit against God last week for causing 'widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth's inhabitants." [DListed]

• Now Pamela Anderson just gives it away for free. [HT]

• Angelina says she's only slept with four men. She must be forgetting that men named Billy Bob count as four or five. [ICYDK]

• Kanye West: "[Black people's] biggest advantage is that we wear gold jewelry really well." That does it: Kanye West doesn't care about black people. [INO]

• Despite what you'll read here, Jared Leto's actual diet is being in a shitty enough band to starve. [Yeeeah]

• Paris Hilton storms the gates of Valtrexia Palace, demanding they release their abundant treasure. [CityRag]