I've been hearing about the launch of the new iPhone for weeks now because my roommate seems to think this phone is the second coming of Xenu, so I feel slightly justified when I admit that this brought a smile to my face:

The launch of Apple Inc.'s much-anticipated new iPhone turned into an information-technology meltdown on Friday, as customers were unable to get their phones working.

Here's what happened: There was some sort of glitch with Apple's iTunes servers which kept the phones from being fully activated in the stores; instead, buyers — many of whom had camped out for hours just to be among the first to own the new phone — had to go home and perform the last step on their own computers. Sadly, the iTunes server wasn't available even from home, leaving the phones unusable.

Oh, and owners of the old model got screwed over, too: "A software update released for that phone on Friday morning required the phone to be reactivated through iTunes. 'It's a mess,' said freelance photographer Giovanni Cipriano, who updated his first-generation iPhone only to find it unusable."

I knew I loved my Blackberry for a reason, and it's not just because I play Brickbreaker like it's my job.

APPLE ZOMBIES, REJOICE! "A source tells us that 'someone who designed part of the iPhone UI, who generally has access to new hardware locked down in a room to play with,' told him that the new iPhone will run on faster 3G networks, as expected; feature new, improved speakers on the bottom; and an improved camera. It will hit stores June 12."

[Source]

We really love his loyalty to the grand tradition of cinema and we agree that many, many people need to "get real" about practically everything, but what if they're just, like, on the subway watching The Bourne Identity? That's OK, right?

Relax, David, we don't think anyone is staring at their cell phone and trying to wrap their brain around Inland Empire. And if they are, they deserve the headache.