You know what's fun? Listening to Nick Hogan cry to his mother on the phone about how horrible jail is. The great thing about the Hogans is that they don't really grasp the concept of reality — take, for example, Nick's refusal to sympathize with his close friend who will have to live the rest of his life suffering the consequences of Nick's actions. Heaven forbid Nick experience trauma for eight months when someone else will never get their life back. Nick is truly an inspiration to America.
Listen to the conversation here.
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Poor little Nick Hogan. He's barely made it into his eight-month reckless driving sentence, and he's already pulling a Paris Hilton. Seems the baby Hulkster had different expectations going into prison, and now he has been calling his family nonstop to garner sympathy. According to documents, he complained to his mother about how horrible the treatment has become:
Had I known this, I would have rather gone to trial or I would rather, you know, appeal the case or something. I can't deal with this for eight months. [My cell is] like the size of my bathroom. No windows or nothing. Just one little top bed thing. … All you do is sit there and think, and there's nothing to think about.
Hey Nick, here's an idea: Perhaps you could think about why you're in jail in the first place. And, we don't know, maybe you can grow from this experience? We don't want to shoot for the moon here, but it's worth a shot.
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BYE BYE BYE "Boy band man Lou Pearlman — the guy who made the Backstreet Boys and *NSYNC famous — just got 25 years in the big house for money laundering and conspiracy, among other shady s–t."
Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty have a lot in common — they both work in the music industry, they're both above the law, and they're both complete disasters. So it's natural they would spend quality time together, like last night after a Babyshambles concert. Wonder what those two talk about?
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Musician Pete Doherty emerged from prison this morning draped in rosaries. The world is once more his drug den.
Pete Doherty is being released from prison after serving 29 days of a 98-day sentence for parole violations. This despite the fact that Doherty was doing so much heroin behind bars that unpaid dealers had plans to cripple him.
According to a friend of Doherty's, when he's released Tuesday, he's "planning to go straight to play a gig — and then get smashed." Weird that jail didn't rehabilitate him, huh?
Ahlamdo-Lillah! Pete Doherty is reportedly studying Islam while imprisoned for his many probation violations, because that's what one does while in jail. A "friend" of Doherty's told UK paper The Sun: "I’m surprised how much it has calmed him down as he was very on edge inside. He definitely seems more chilled. He’s lapping it up and really interested in it. I think it’s helping him in there." Related: English prisoners now calling moonshine "Islam."
Guess what? Amy Winehouse was arrested. Take a minute and let your shock subside. Perhaps you should have a seat.
The troubled singer was taken into custody in London on suspicion of assault after voluntarily going to a police station for questioning. The incident of interest took place after a late night out, when Amy reportedly headbutted a guy who was trying to help her hail a cab outside a bar. And just in case we didn't get the "I'm crazy" memo, she went on to punch a different man in the face.
Um, where are her parents? They can no longer use the excuse that Amy is an adult and they have no control over her health — Jamie Spears squashed that theory months ago.
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SEE YA; WOULDN'T WANNA BE YA Breaking: Wesley Snipes Sentenced to 3 Years in Prison for Tax Evasion
DOH!(ERTY) "[Pete Doherty] is thousands of pounds in debt. Now he has been evicted from his sprawling nine-bedroom mansion after wrecking the place over the past year. Popping over to check on the place the landlord was horrified to find that his beautiful country pad had become a stinking hovel. The walls, floor and even some of the windows have been daubed with human blood. And we're told the stench from his abandoned nine cats is so strong it would turn the strongest stomach. After taking one look at the carnage, the landlord cancelled Doherty's tenancy."
Michael Lohan is truly out of his mind. The former convict, who spent two and a half years in prison during the prime of his daughter Lindsay's career, has popped up yet again with advice for the media that he should be giving to his family in private.
On Wednesday, Mike talked about taking a missionary trip to India with Lindsay, but her rep quickly shot down that idea. It should go without saying that Dad was none too pleased with this development and decided to share his anger with the rest of the world:
I think we can all see that her present so-called friends and management have her focused on the wrong projects and things.
If Lindsay would just listen to me and follow my guidance, like she did when her life was on the right path, and before the people you see now that are in her life, I guarantee that her life would straighten out and she'd be back to being the gifted actress everyone knew and loved.
Really, Mike? Because the only time everyone "knew and loved" Linds was in Mean Girls, and we have a hard time believing you were involved in that at all.
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It’s absolutely no surprise to any of us that Akon is full of shit, right? It’s just sort of crazy that the people at The Smoking Gun, which is really on a roll these days, are the first ones to officially call him on it.
With a little digging, they’ve figured out that Akon’s famed backstory — that he was in jail for 4 1/2 years for being “ringleader of a notorious car theft operation” and wrote songs, like his famous “Locked Up” while he was in jail — was false. And the name of his company, Konvict Music, was more wishful thinking than it was based in reality. In his lifetime, he has spent only a few months in county jail.
Genius junkie Pete Doherty has been sentenced to 14 weeks in jail for violating his probation. At an earlier hearing in which he narrowly avoided jail time, Petey was ordered to stay away from sweet, numbing drugs, but he ignored that request; now the lawman's patience is gone. But: fools! Everyone knows British prisons have the purest dope.
Anne Hathaway's boyfriend of four years, Raffaelo Follieri, was arrested in New York Thursday for bouncing a check worth $250,000.
It's reported Follieri, an Italian property developer, went willingly with police officers to work out the misunderstanding, so there were no handcuffs or loud sirens involved. That spared him of any humiliation until the gossip blogs could get wind of the story.
His lawyers were sorting out the situation and Follieri was released from custody later in the day.
Predictably, nobody cares and Anne still looks like Hollywood's goody two-shoes.
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DOING IT FOR THE KIDS "Rapper T.I. has just plead guilty to federal weapons possession charges — and will spend one year behind bars. T.I., real name Clifford Harris, will begin his sentence after completing at least 1,000 hours of community service — talking to kids about the dangers of drugs, gangs and guns. The rapper plead guilty to possession of an unregistered firearm, possession of machine guns and possession of a firearm by a convicted felon."
If, for some reason, you were surprised by Jackass star Steve-O's recent hospitalization, this video — taken after he was released from his recent stint in jail — explains so much.
SLUTS REJOICE! "Girls Gone Wild's Joe Francis is finally going back to Florida to face criminal charges there. His lawyer told a federal judge in Reno that Joe will be headed back to Panama City, Fla. on Wednesday to deal with charges stemming from his alleged filming of underage girls in that city. Francis had been stuck in legal limbo for a year, unable to leave a jail in Nevada, where he faces tax evasion charges."
HE'S STILL ALIVE? "Jackass star Steve-O will be charged with the felony of possession of a controlled substance. … Steve-O was arrested at 5 a.m. this morning at his apartment after a neighbor called in complaining about vandalism at the apartment building."
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