There's no amount of money in the world that would make us sit through the American Music Awards (OK, that's not entirely accurate), so instead of a write-up of the snooze-fest, here's an exhaustive collection of photos. From the looks of things, Miley Cyrus once again made the entire event all about her (and her 16th birthday, which she's been celebrating for the past few months). Surprise, surprise.
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FOXXY BOXING "Boxing legend Mike Tyson is looking for his latest knockout - a blockbuster Hollywood movie about his life. Iron Mike says he is well on his way with serious plans for a movie he will produce about his controversial and troubled life. And he is working hand-in-hand with Oscar winner Jamie Foxx, who plans to star as the former heavyweight champ in the movie."
Oscar-winning actor Jamie Foxx has announced that he will be partnering with MTV to host a minstrel show dedicated to turning feral black men into docile sophisticates. The program will be titled From G’s to Gents. Pay attention, all interested "G's":
- Are you a hustler?
- Do you have the passion and skills, but can’t catch a break?
- Is your self-worth measured by the number of fights you’ve won, girls you’ve slept with, or weight of bling around your neck? ”From G’s to Gents” will take 15 young “G’s” and polish them up. Taking lessons in everything from Style and Grace, Etiquette, Chivalry, and Business Skills, the men will LEARN that with the right tools every G has the ability to be a true Gentleman – and a real shot at finding success.The Stakes: The G that makes it to the end of the competition will win a large cash prize and the opportunity to make their dream job and lifestyle a reality.
Q: How is the apostrophe in "G's" like From G's to Gents? A: They shouldn't exist.
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Let's be honest: Celebrities are usually only interested in sports if it will guarantee them a photo op. Saturday night's NY Giants celebration party was no different, with the guest list consisting of a couple A-listers, some people we've heard of but haven't seen in awhile, and then a few who made us go, "Who?"
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• The Pope taking on the form of fire and waving hello from beyond the grave? Why not! [DListed]
• This look is called the "Canadian Tuxedo." [PS]
• Britney Spears is casting terrible backup dancers to take the focus off of herself. [ICYDK]
• Nice compliment, Underminer. [INO]
• Ivanka Trump's plastic surgeon must be as wealthy as her. [HT]
• Lindsay Lohan is moving to Utah, where the bitching of the polygamists is guaranteed to nag you off your buzz. [Yeeeah]
If you're too shallow a man to hold people's attention with just your personality and you turn to bling (too white?) for support, try to make sure that it's not clip-on, training wheels bling that will make you look ridiculous when the telephoto lenses catch you.
Jamie Foxx recently ramped up efforts to be seen as a complete ass— as opposed to just a drunk ass—by making veiled gay jokes to the New York Daily News. While sharing an anecdote about howAl Pacino spits excessively when speaking, Foxx said, "When we did 'Any Given Sunday,' I tasted him…Not in a Ryan Seacrest/Clay Aiken sort of way." Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Hilarious! Nice to see an Oscar winning comedian taking cheap swipes at easy targets. Anyway, I'd rather be Seacrest than some shit known best for portraying Gay Charles. See that? Two can play 7th grade jerk, Foxx.
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If you're Jamie Foxx and you're very charismatic, famous and successful, it's probably easy to get laid. You just go up to a table of women, be charming and take your pick, right? Wrong. If you're Jamie Foxx, you take to a high vantage point, borrow a flashlight from a nightclub security guard and subsequently proceed to shine the flashlight on ladies with whom you'd like to dance. The gesture is stupid, sad and shallow, and it undoubtedly attracts the same type of women.
Lazy decadence like this is part of the reason Rome fell. Let's hope the tradition continues with Jamie Foxx.
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Seriously. All the kids are doing it. Today, Mischa's little sister, Hania, 19, checked into rehab:
…Mischa Barton’s younger sister Hania, 19, has just been checked into a rehabilitation facility to treat her addiction to prescription pain killers. Hania Barton (who just turned 19 on February 18), was getting "out of control" according to sources close to the Barton family.
The former The O.C. star, 21, is said to be very upset about what is going on with her little sister, but is glad that she’s getting the help that she needs.
It's always weird when people associated with acting parts depicting stupid behavior end up allowing said stupid behavior into their real lives. This girl's sister just spent a few years portraying a sad, alcoholic party girl who prematurely dies, and yet she still becomes a sad, pill popping party girl. Didn't she learn shit from Marissa Cooper's downfall? I mean, The OC isn't Masterpiece Theater, but come on! The same goes for Lindsay Lohan for still being shallow after Mean Girls and Jamie Foxx for still being a flashy jackass after Any Given Sunday.
I guess that's why it's called acting.
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If anyone can coax obnoxious, egomaniacal, questionably talented douchebags out of the woodwork, it's Paris Hilton. Oh, that's definitely Hobie Buchannon up there personifying exactly why people hate LA, but there were plenty of other gross saddies there to up the mediocrity factor. Here's Jamie Foxx conspicuously brandishing a bottle of expensive vodka, there's Scott Storch begging for Paris' attention like a lonely pup and over there's that bloated billionaire dude.
Of course, nowhere to be found was the muted humility that comes with great wealth and success. That usually doesn't make it past the velvet ropes.
• Cuh-reepy celeb minis. [Worth1000]
• Ill will: Howard K. Stern is gonna make a killing. :( [TMZ]
• Britney Spears' baby's eyes. GO CRAZY! [PITNB]
• Harry Potter casts a gratuitous ass-shot spell. [DListed]
• Probably couldn't take her mind off the hateful droves of cig tossers. [PopSugar]
• Tyra really making strides for black Americans by putting on a bathing suit and standing around. Magnificent. Praise her. [IDLYITW]
• The dude wears shiny, expensive suits. Why have a stylist you're going to stiff when that's what you wear. Next time just go to www.moneyedandobnoxious.com, Foxx. [ASL]
Jamie Foxx played Madison Square Garden last night, blending his only tolerable R&B crooning (actual lyrics: …baby one plus one ain't two when you wit' me/ C ain't after A and B when you wit' me…) with really timely comedy. According to the New York Daily News, among his best zingers were jokes about Britney Spears not wearing panties, OJ being crazy and Michael Richards' slur-laden rant. I'm glad someone finally has the balls to take shots at Britney Spears and OJ. You da man, Foxx.
Together, the whole shebang presented Foxx as old-school "entertainer," a term normally applied to those who don't do any one thing particularly well. (Think Zsa Zsa Gabor.)
In fact, Foxx has proven himself adept at all these disciplines. But hogtied together, the result ended up herky-jerky in pace and scattered in content.
…Foxx's rhythm had assurance, but the content lacked cleverness.
In his fine R&B songs, Foxx showed both a creamy falsetto and a sure tenor. But even here his patter proved distracting and some songs wound up seeming more like skits. The Ray Charles impersonation, so gripping on screen, seemed like the world's weirdest karaoke live.
Him impersonating Ray Charles at his shows is like your uncle reliving his football glory days, except it's even more grandiose and expensive and, subsequently, sad. He should just get Jacob the Jeweler to turn his Oscar into a necklace and get it over with. It's all pretty predictable.
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• Matthew McConaughey was again spotted being that "groovy" character from Dazed and Confused. [PopSugar]
• Renée Zellweger is dating—wait for it—LUKE PERRY! [NYPP6]
• Naomi Campbell is going to have to attend anger management classes for hitting the help. Donald Trump doesn't see what the big deal is. [AP]
• "You Know It’s Bad When People Think You’re a Bigger Mess Than Paris Hilton." [DListed]
• Jamie Foxx was caught dropping N-bombs at a comedy club à la Michael Richards, but these were the harmless ones with an "a" at the end, not an "e-r." [NYDN]
• The Jolie-Pitt clan is moving to New Orleans so they can finally live out their dreams of constantly be in a nightmarish, surreal war zone. [Us]
• Rapper The Game has challenged David Beckham to a fight upon his arrival in LA. I just checked and Beckham's still too rich and handsome to give a fuck. [AngryApe]
Award Show Season! I have no idea if there is an official start to Award Show Season, and perhaps I already missed it, but judging from the guest list at last night's American Music Awards, this event had enough heavy hitters to qualify as the inaugural event. Britney Spears even took the stake soon after Jimmy Kimmel made fun of K-Fed calling him a "no-hit wonder", It's only a matter of time before she is publicly making fun of him herself. And it's going to be awesome.
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…And then she looks so sad bunny when she finally gets herself some real ears. Just can't please that one. Paris Hilton, Brody Jenner and Jamie Foxx were among the celebs present at the grand opening of the Playboy Club VIP Lounge at The Palms Casino and Resort. Though she's not a Playboy bunny by trade, you can just see that Paris has it in her trampy, trampy heart.
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Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes continued to ram it into our heads that they are normal by attending last night's Redskins vs. Vikings Monday Night Football game. Tom is now in cahoots of some sort with the owner of the Redskins, hence the extra special treatment. Tom clearly still won't let Katie take off the sunglasses in public, because we all know how well that goes.
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• Diddy should take more care when dressing his all-girl super-group Danity Kane. Ixnay on the Otpantshay. [DListed]
• At least Kevin Smith owns up to the quality of Clerks II, and his lovemaking. [Yeeah]
• Is Janet Jackson getting married? Is she even engaged? Does she have any idea? [WWTDD]
• Tom Cruise finally regained control of TomCruise.com, so he finally has his rightful corner of the internet to spead his crazy. [A Socialite's Life]
• Jamie Foxx ain't saying Carmen Elektra isa gold digger…you know the rest. [Faded Youth]
• No amount of staring at the cake will make you not 41 and rapidly turning into your own despicable television personality, Jeremy Piven. [BWE]
• You will go into club when Lindsay Lohan tells you to, Sean Lennon. What an odd sentence. [X17]
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