• Jennifer Aniston on Uncoolgate '08: "I was just surprised that Vogue would go so tabloid. … I was bummed. But you almost expect it. Big deal. Done. Next." [PS]

• Sarah Jessica Parker's son has some crazy hair. [ICYDK]

• Anne Heche is pregnant, because there aren't enough babies in Hollywood. [Yeeeah]

• In case you were too busy last night watching Miley Cyrus ruin Christmas at the Rockefeller tree lighting, here's the Victoria's Secret fashion show. [HT]

• Er, nevermind, Nene is not being evicted. Kim's "low budget bitch" comment was wrong. [DListed]

• Sean Preston and Jayden James enjoyed their day at FAO Schwarz with the paparazzi in tow. [INO]

• This video of a gang of David Archuleta fans discovering the results of American Idol is both glorious and disturbing. [DListed]

• A potential new law could limit the paparazzi's access to stars near schools or hospitals. This is only, what, two years too late? [INO]

• John Mayer met Jennifer Aniston's parents. For those of you who care. [Yeeeah]

• Britney Spears might surprise everyone with a top-secret American Music Awards performance. What could possibly go wrong? [PS]

• Finally, some real men. [CityRag]

• ABC cancels three shows from its primetime lineup. Times are tough. [ICYDK]

All this talk about Jennifer Aniston/Brad Pitt/Angelina Jolie lately has made us sick of the trio — until we see moments like this and we remember that everyone's human after all. At a press conference to discuss The Changeling, Angie teared up when discussing how she drew inspiration for her role from her late mother. It's touching, and a nice break from the "uncool" controversy of '08. Not saying the woman is perfect — because, to be honest, we tend to side with Jen in the love triangle situation — but everyone has a heart.

OK seriously, everyone, WTF is up with Brangelinanistongate '08?

Beg pardon, but the intense interest in this petty love triangle escapes me in the way a good card trick does—I see it, I know it's happened and that there's a way it happened, and yet I have no idea how. How did these three peoples' intertwined relationships become not just global news, but news in which many seem to have an emotional investment? Why do we (as a trashy society? Nation? World?) care?

I started drinking and theorizing and have come up with the following:

CONTINUED »

Jennifer Aniston took some time out from calling Angelina Jolie "uncool" to guest star on 30 Rock. Get this: She played a deranged stalker who is in love with a man who's no longer interested in her. Crazy, right?

Anyway, she did a decent job because there's a select few characters at which Aniston excels — and this is one of them. It still feels like she's playing Rachel at all times, but it worked in this scenario. Unfortunately for the show, her appearance failed to boost ratings in the wake of Oprah's legendary guest appearance from last week. Cue the Brangaloonies and Perez Hilton, who will surely say this is all Jen's fault and she can't do anything right.

Current Jennifer Aniston love interest John Mayer has been snatched up by CBS to host a variety show in 2009. According to insiders, the weekly extravaganza will be a "music, variety and sketch show in the '60s mold."

Because if Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey taught us anything, it's that prime time variety shows are insanely successful.

[Source]

BRAD TELLS JEN TO SHUT IT • "Brad Pitt was allegedly none too happy about Jen Aniston slamming his baby mama in Vogue mag. The Chicago Sun-Times cites a 'very close source' of Brangelina who says AJ and BP were 'totally thrown' by the Aniston interview, in which she said Ange was 'uncool' for yapping about the beginnings of Brangelina in public. So much so, a source tells the paper Brad actually called Jen to complain."

[Source]

• The many faces of drunk Christina Aguilera, red lipstick included. [CityRag]

• All Angelina Jolie comments aside, Jennifer Aniston's Vogue interview is a fairly good read. [PS]

• OMG you guys! Joe Jonas has a new girlfriend! Squeee! [Yeeeah]

• Jesse Metcalfe recovered from his Monaco fall just in time to be photographed in a wheelchair by the paparazzi. Stay strong, Jess. [DListed]

• Adam Sandler's a father (again). [ICYDK]

• Lauren Conrad's former Hills flame is creeping down the Hollywood ladder, as all good famewhores eventually do. [INO]

Oh, Jennifer Aniston, no. No no no. Why, after four years, would you even think about opening your mouth to a national publication about the rumored feud between you and Angelina Jolie? This just reeks of desperation and lends entirely too much credibility to the naysayers who claim you're bitter and resentful.

All of this nonsense is the result of Jen "icily" telling the newest issue of Vogue: "What Angelina did was very uncool." This, in light of Angie's recent revelation that she and Jen's ex-husband, Brad Pitt, fell in love during the making of Mr. and Mrs. Smith, contrary to earlier reports that the romance started only after filming.

Unfortunately, Jen's friends aren't helping matters. One is even calling this middle school feud "hugely significant": "This interview shows that Jennifer is no longer afraid of Angelina." No, actually, it shows that Jennifer still can't let this whole thing go.

[Source]

• Christina Aguilera's new Target commercial is 100 times better than that bizarre "Keeps Gettin' Better" video she released. [INO]

• What in the hell kind of outfit is Whitney Port wearing and why? [PS]

• Ten invaluable life lessons from Judge Judy. Write these down. [CityRag]

• Betty Boop is coming to Broadway. Why not? [DListed]

• Brad Pitt says Angelina Jolie is the love of his life. Somewhere, Jennifer Aniston is crying. [ICYDK]

• Zac Efron on Daniel Radcliffe's Broadway "exposure": "Daniel was very ballsy." Heh. [Yeeeah]

• This video of a cat trying to fit in a yogurt box is strangely captivating. [CityRag]

• Jennifer Aniston is reportedly pregnant with twins. Of course she is. [Yeeeah]

• Paris Hilton lost last night's presidential election. How did this happen?! [PS]

• Anne Hathaway's new boyfriend is about 500 steps up from her last. [INO]

• Hollywood's newest love muffin, Robert Pattinson: “I always get carried away when I’m kissing people. I just go nuts.” Swoon! [ICYDK]

• Tom Cruise plans to ruin Charlize Theron. [DListed]

• Because you can never have too many heartwarming tales involving animals. [DListed]

• Something's off with Nicole Richie's body proportions. [HT]

• Pink says she's "proud" to be mistaken for a lesbian: "I don’t care. I love to challenge people’s preconceptions." Fair enough. [Yeeeah]

• The "Izzie's getting killed off of Grey's Anatomy!" rumors are making a comeback. We're still on board with anything involving less Katherine Heigl. [ICYDK]

• Jennifer Aniston sinks her claws back into Gerard Butler. Why can't everyone just leave G.But alone? [PS]

• Paris Hilton and Benji Madden have a rule stating they can't go more than a week without seeing each other. It's similar to Paris' other rule that she can't go a day without being photographed. [INO]

• By popular demand: The other clip of Sarah Palin's Saturday Night Live appearance. [Yeeeah]

• Jennifer Aniston is reportedly pregnant with John Mayer's baby. We'll wait until the National Enquirer confirms this before we believe it. [INO]

• Guy Ritchie on sex with Madonna: It's like "cuddling up to a piece of gristle." [CityRag]

• Tara Reid reminds us of the dangers of too much plastic surgery. [ICYDK]

• Suri Cruise tries to make a run for it after Tom forces her to pose for pictures. What a dad. [DListed]

• Dakota Fanning performed with her high school cheerleading squad over the weekend while her new movie debuted at the box office. Just like us! [PS]

• The actress who played Marcia Brady wasn't all that wholesome: She traded sex for drugs. [Yeeeah]

• Hope nobody's planning to spend New Year's in Dubai. [INO]

• Things we never want to see: Sharon Stone's cameltoe. [CityRag]

• Dumbest shoes ever. [DListed]

• John Mayer and Jennifer Aniston are back together. Who didn't see this one coming? [PS]

• Now that Holly Madison is no longer with Hugh Hefner, she's moved on to bigger and better things. At a bowling alley. [ICYDK]

Here's Jessica Alba's latest ad for the Declare Yourself campaign, aimed at getting young people to vote. Although, if you ask us, this doesn't inspire us to do anything politically — we're just creeped out and annoying by Alba, as usual.

In other political celebrity news, an army of famous people — including Leonardo DiCaprio, Ellen DeGeneres, Jennifer Aniston, Halle Berry and Jonah Hill — shot a new ad encouraging everyone not to vote. You can watch it here.

Is the election over yet?

• OK! magazine was not interested in Clay Aiken's coming out story, claiming it wasn't a big deal. Yeah, why feature a talked-about story when you can have a cover like the one above? Good move, OK! [INO]

• Jennifer Aniston takes a break from being America's Punching Bag to vacation in Mexico. Life is rough. [Yeeeah]

• Things too awkward for words: Samantha Ronson in a bikini. [HT]

• Kelly Osbourne struggled with a possible pregnancy at 13. When I was 13 I was struggling to remember not to throw my retainer away in the cafeteria's trash bins. To each her own. [ICYDK]

• Mark Wahlberg wasn't so creative with the baby names — that's a good thing. [DListed]

• DJ AM put his recovery on hold to attend a memorial service for one of the victims of the deadly plane crash. [PS]

Jennifer Aniston just recently broke up with John Mayer, but not to worry — she's already found comfort in the arms of the beautiful Gerard Butler. Ugh. Says a spy at the Toronto International Film Festival:

[It] didn’t take long for the two of them to gravitate towards each other, ending up with their heads bent together in a flirty, intimate conversation. At one point I’m told his hand was placed on that sexy part of the thigh. He was also spotted rubbing her shoulder and back, leaning in close to her ear, and she of course was returning his attraction with that patented hairplay she’s perfected over the years.

That whole lame scenario just sounds like a bad movie. Which would explain why Jennifer Aniston's involved. Zing!

[Source]

• This guy was arrested after assaulting someone with an 8-inch sausage. Seriously. [DListed]

• Lynne Spears desperately attempts to make nice with Britney. [ICYDK]

• Please tell us arm warmers are not the new trend for fall/winter. [HT]

• Poor Jessica Simpson can't win. [PS]

• The peg leg jeans have descended upon Fashion Week. Everybody take cover. [INO]

• Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt had a secret date at the Toronto Film Festival, according to some crazy liar. [Yeeeah]