• What gives with the humping inanimate objects? Is that sexy? [SH]

• "Nice Day For A Meth Face Wedding" [DListed]

• Who's your favorite female celebrity? Related: Why do you have a favorite female celebrity? [PS]

• The first good choice this woman has ever made. [HT]

• For the benefit of those who are reactionary to the point of stupidity, today Will Smith explained that he doesn't like Hitler. [EBG]

• Michael Jackson's son beat his delicate face in! [INO]

• Paris Hilton's grandfather is a mensch. What happened to her? [ICYDK]

• Ha! [CityRag]

• HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Yesssssssssss! [CityRag]

• I think the British Pamela Anderson is actually worse than ours. [DListed]

• What a difference a lot less makeup makes. [HT]

• Upgrade? [INO]

• Vegetarians do it better! [ICYDK]

• Another American Pie alumna! Such bland dessert! [Yeeeah]

Women who are treated poorly early in life are generally easy to spot, as their issues are manifested in big fake boobs, orange skin and acrylic nails as hard as their father's hearts. Women with major problems will have all of the above, but they'll also prance around, sometimes literally, like princesses; being whisked about in sedan chairs and smiling down their noses at their "subjects," finally feeling like royalty for the first time in their lives.

Deadbeat dads shouldn't just have to pay back child support; they should also be forced to buy sunglasses for every poor citizen inadvertently blinded by their mistake's glimmering pod of tits and tiaras.

More after the jump.

CONTINUED »

• "I went all the way to Paris and all I brought back was this crappy case of TB." Doesn't the infected clown look exactly like the "dreamboat" from The Office? [BWE]

• Just when you were forgetting the name Birkhead. [DListed]

• They have big breasted idiots in England, also. [HT]

• Becks wasn't always handsome. [ICYDK]

• Danny Bonaduce behaving just as you'd expect. [Yeeeah]

• I bet this guy says "over yonder." [CityRag]

• You nappy headed hos are li'l whiny bitches, too. It was a joke! [TMZ]

• Maybe this town ain't big enough for the egos and the boobs and the tans and the bleach. [DListed]

• Madonna on the adoption trail again. [PopSugar]

• Duke players not rapists. MLK's dream finally achieved. [Jossip]

• Bar's a mommy? [Glitterati]

• Enrique keeps his courage in his mole. [IDLYITW]

Get ready, America! Like a worn out Louis Vuitton duffel stuffed with breasts and babies, Jordan has fallen out of an intercontinental flight and she likes what she sees. So much so, in fact, she's decided to bring her spectacle stateside with a reality television show.

Jordan aka Katie Price and her husband, pop singer Peter Andre, are in California to pimp their new realtitty show for E! network, which will trace the lives of the tasteless twosome as they attempt to conquer America with the curious brand of "chav" flash, as exemplified by Jordan's purse.

What luck!

Clever girl waiting for Pamela Anderson to be on a decline, because this country just isn't big enough for two women to be famous based on no merit but their heaving tits.

Oh, wait, yes it is.

[Source, Source]