The annual Maxim "Hot 100" was released in full today, further imbruing the cultural landscape with rampant mediocrity and offensive thoughtlessness. At number one is a blond woman with disproportionately large breasts. Number two? That's right: a blond woman with disproportionately large breasts. The list also includes Britney Spears, who Maxim attests "oozes genuine sexiness."

Here, we again attempt to combat lad mag idiocy with our own list of beautiful and sexy women. Click through for a Simpson sister-free zone. And, of course, feel free to suggest additions or complain.

CONTINUED »

Kelly LeBrock, who quickened the pulse of every young man born in the 80s with her half-shirted turn in Weird Science, has vowed to stop dieting. Though LeBrock lost 31 pounds last year on VH1's Celebrity Fit Club, the growing ex-model says she's fine with her recent weight gain, and worrying about her frame is no longer her bag:

“I’m not fat!” Kelly declared. “I don’t look like a 400-pound heifer! I’m going to keep eating. I eat normally. And I’ve had three kids.

Three kids?!?! No wonder she's huge. We can't even get through a whole toddler without feeling ill.

[Source]