Joe Francis, upon being vindicated of charges that his company manipulated drunken women into exposing themselves: "This is yet another example of false allegations that I have faced. I am tired of these lies being used against me in an attempt to extort money from me and destroy my name." Because in a world of bared tits and drunken whoring, a man's good name means everything to him.

The worst joke in that torturous one-trick pony Zoolander ("OK, I get it—he's stupid.") was Blue Steel. Aside from being not funny, "the signature look" thing was repetitive and completely absurd. That is, until I saw this photo, which makes me think that people actually do have signature looks. And just like that, dry bit becomes sad, surreal reality.

More signature looks under here.

CONTINUED »

Perhaps the only good thing about a cancer scare is that it horrifies you into taking care of yourself for the rest of your life. So, whereas some of us who have yet to be rattled in such a way continue ordering bourbons at lunch and adding more butter to the Alfredo sauce, Kylie Minogue is exercising and drinking water with every steamed vegetable plate she orders, fully aware at how quickly existence can unravel. That's why, at 38, she still looks like Hilary Duff's younger sister.

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• What are you guys, fucking Wilson from Home Improvement? [ONTD]

• It's gross, but keep in mind that it could have been much grosser. [DListed]

• I can't resist a Vada Sultenfuss reference. [BWE]

• Want an iPod signed by Britney Spears? No? Just think of it as a slightly damaged iPod, then. Now you want it. [INO]

• Love Hewitt shilling for Hanes. [ICYDK]

• How does someone with such an easy target of a name (Nick La-gay, Dick Lachey, Dick La-gay) not learn how to verbally defend themselves in 6th grade? [Jossip]

• Aniston's boobs and old nose. [Egotastic]

• Who woulda thought Howard K. Stern would be the one to defile the name Howard Stern? [INO]

• Wonderland working wonders. [PopSugar]

• Kylie's a li'l bundle of class. [ASL]

• My "diet doctor" hates my ice cream doctor and my mozzarella sticks nurse. [TS]

• FBI losing guns and sensitive information. No big deal, as conflicts worldwide remain at an all time low. [CNN]

• American Idol contestants are giving street cred to a cappella groups at colleges nationwide. [TMZ]

Gorgeous French actor Olivier Martinez is doing exactly what you'd expect a gorgeous French actor to do and not stressing about the fact that he just broke up with his longtime girlfriend, Kylie Minogue. Literally the day after the two split, Olivier was out shopping for expensive cars and hitting up parties with "leggy blonds." Sacre bleu!

Most would reach for a pot of ice cream or a stiff drink to mend a broken heart, but not hunk Olivier. After only one day since announcing his split from Kylie Minogue he was spotted doing a bit of car shopping (as you do when your loaded). Olivier later used his purchase, a vintage Aston-Martin convertible, to drive himself and a leggy blonde to a party attended by director Ridley Scott. The lady was also seen returning to his hotel. He has also reportedly been seen on many occasions with close Model friend Sarai Givati, and rumours persist that his infidelity is the course of the break up.

So, the handsome French actor whose big break came in Unfaithful isn't really too distraught about his break-up? Get outta town! All he needs now is a black and white striped shirt and a beret.

[Source]