Charlie Sheen has apologized to "all [he] obviously offended" by calling his ex-wife, Denise Richards, a "fucking nigger" in a swear-heavy rant he left on her voicemail three years ago. Despite its age, Richards released the recording, in which Sheen also labels her a "fucking cunt," presumably because she is a spiteful, spiteful person.

Sheen sent out a special acknowledgment to Tony Todd, his black friend, best man for two weddings and THE Candyman. Sheen star offered no message of peace to cunts.

After the jump, a clip of the scariest yet greatest groomsman in the history of nuptials.

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Words used in this article to describe the haircut at right: headturning, standout, this decade's "Rachel," challenging, radical, classic, rebel, fresh, confident, nice, punky, cutting-edge

Words needed to describe the haircut at right: short, white

From TMZ, Hollywood's notorious hive of ill-bred bullies: "So our spies at a few Hollywood restaurants have weighed in on celeb tippers and gyppers. And the verdict is in."

Classy! We can't wait for Levin et al's item on which studio execs are the best at Jewing down actors' salary demands.

Oh: The bad tippers are the Beckhams.