Michelle Obama, whom Jon Stewart jokingly referred to as a "known associate of Barack Obama," made the talk show rounds yesterday, hitting up Larry King Live and The Daily Show. On the latter, she said that she prefers not to watch the debates because she gets "nervous." She also described Cindy McCain as cordial and said that reporters and commentators makes much ado about nothing when they analyze handshakes and snubs. She has to say that, though.
• Elisabeth Hasslebeck comes off looking dumber than ever. [INO]
• Larry King fans have too much time on their hands. [CityRag]
• Why this Sunday will be more blessed than usual. [DListed]
• Christina Aguilera couldn't stay away from that obnoxious red lipstick. [PS]
• Adam Sandler runs errands in the same outfit he wore to his movie premiere, which lets you know how much he cares about You Don't Mess with the Zohan. [ICYDK]
• Miley Cyrus' handlers need to tell her to just stop talking. [Yeeeah]
Elisabeth Hasselbeck proved last night why at least half of America dislikes her: After Fran Drescher made a harmless remark about how Elisabeth started crying during The Great View N-Word Fight of '08, the talk show panelist called into Larry King Live — which her coworker Joy Behar was hosting — to retaliate. Um, Elisabeth? Probably not best to pounce on a woman who barely said anything hurtful about you. It makes you come across as — um, what's the appropriate word? — obnoxious. We'll leave it at that.
Click through for the clip of Elisabeth's hissy fit.
Khloe Kardashian's stint in jail came and went yesterday as the famewhore served 173 minutes of her original 30-day sentence. But before you start to think she had it easy, listen to these horrors she endured while serving her time: A woman on her bus suffered a seizure, her building was on lockdown after receiving a bomb threat, and the guards wouldn't give Khloe a blanket even though she was cold.
The worst part? She didn't even get to wear a cute orange jumpsuit — she was in and out so quickly she didn't have time to change clothes. Oh, the humanity!
Look for Khloe's tearful post-jail interview this week on Larry King Live.
Famous LA intersection namesake and increasingly bad interviewer Larry King, 74, has revealed that he's misguidedly titling his new memoirs What Am I Doing Here? The hunched CNN staple said he also considered Did I Order Soup?, Where Are You Taking Me? and C'mere and Smell This, Wouldja?
CNN stick figure Larry King will have his own street named after him in Los Angeles. Where Sunset and Cahuenga boulevards meet, the name "Larry King Square" will reign supreme.
Congratulations, Larry, this is all yours:
ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST "Larry King's stunning TV-personality wife, Shawn Southwick King, 48, has gone into rehab for addiction to painkillers."
Unsuccessful in their attempts to garner public sympathy via MySpace and Larry King Live, the Hogans are now making public threatening messages that the family believes are from Frank Graziano, the brother of the man left in a vegetative state after getting in the car with Nick.
Sure, the messages are cause for concern, but they were played on the radio this morning by host Bubba the Love Sponge, who just so happens to be a close Hogan family friend. This is obviously more of a publicity issue than it is about safety.
Also? We can guarantee the culprit isn't a member of the Graziano clan. The mystery man threatened to piss on the family's grave — it's obviously Sam Lutfi. Case closed.
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Question: Is it at all self-indulgent for senior citizens with famously shoddy tickers to have children they'll never be able to chase around open fields?
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Hulk Hogan took to
Paris Hilton attended Sober Day 2008, an event hosted by the Brent Shapiro Foundation for Alcohol and Drug Awareness, this weekend in Beverly Hills. We're guessing she has a different take on the meaning of "alcohol awareness."
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THE SOFTBALL GAME CONTINUES "Sources tell TVNewser that CNN and Larry King have agreed to a contract extension, which will keep the anchor with the network through 2010, beyond his 77th birthday."
The Kardashians took some time off from spamming our comments section to speak to Larry King, because we're sure his audience would love their show. Larry can barely hide his hatred for the famewhoring family as he stumbles over what's written on his cue cards and tries to figure out the appeal of these horrid people. Oh, and Kim is described as the one who "posed for Playboy," presumably because "has a butt that rivals J.Lo's" and "made a sex tape" were too inappropriate for CNN.
Janet Jackson is a saint. Despite tirelessly promoting her new album, she took time to patiently teach Larry King some dance moves. As you can imagine, it's painful to watch, but she lasts a good minute and a half. Which is 89 seconds longer than we would have lasted.
Embroiled surgeon Jan Adams walked off the set of Larry King Live yesterday after telling King, "I had come here to talk about things in the press that aren't accurate about me. But I have a tremendous amount of love and respect for the West family and they've asked me not to go on."
As Adams ambles off, look for a sneer of disgust that could only be summoned by the simultaneously bony and fleshy proportions of Larry King's 3,000,000-year-old visage.
The merry little dance the media does around the word "nigger" has gotten truly nauseous with this: CNN is now using the term "N-BOMB"!!!!!!! N-BOMB! Good god, is everyone five-years-old? How is anything getting accomplished? AHHHHHHHHHH!
Anyway, now Dog is saying his racist tirade is partially due to his limited vocabulary, which has long prevented him from purely expressing himself. And who knows? With a little education, he might soon be able to banish his sons from dating spooks, jigaboos, golliwogs and spear chuckers.
Larry Birkhead appeared on Larry King Live last night to address the allegations that he and the more ghoulish of the Howard Sterns were once lovers, he also vehemently denied that there is video evidence attesting to a tryst. Of Rita Cosby's book, Blonde Ambition: The Untold Story Behind Anna Nicole Smith’s Death, the wellspring of the accusations, Birkhead twangs out that it should be "sittin' next to Harry Potter in the fiction aisle." Damning!
While we're not quick to take sides on such a foreign and trivial matter, we will say that we've never known Rita Cosby to be a liar. Cliff raised her better than that.
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