Perhaps we spoke too soon when we called for more honesty and personal responsibility in the world of celebrity. Because, while we doubt her truthfulness, Heather Mills' new, so-French publicist, Michele Elyzabeth, has made it her responsibility to personally address Mills' bad press in weekly video blogs.

They're insane, basically because the woman fights reductionism with reductionism in a suspect accent while stroking a linty dog. At one point, Elyzabeth calls Joy Behar an "absolutely horrible human being," before railing on The View and their Heather bashing. ("Like, who are they to have an opinion about what Heather should say or not say?" True!) Later, Elyzabeth has one word for anyone who would call her client's demeanor difficult: "Wrong." This woman is wondrous.

After the jump, meet David, a gay man well-versed in gesticulation who is there to support Mills and Elyzabeth.

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