• Auf Wiedersehen: "How else will the new non-Bravo Project Runway screw things up, aside from moving to Lifetime and possibly filming without Nina Garcia? By moving to Los Angeles, the city that pretends to be a fashion capital with its own fashion week but is really just a town where Victoria Beckham pushes her crappy jeans at Kitson." [Jossip]
• Dennis Rodman! Remember that guy? He got arrested last night for roughing up his girlfriend. Now, go back to forgetting about him. [DListed]
• Surprise: Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon were wed in a secluded island ceremony. Unfortunately, they did not stay there after the wedding. [PS]
• Whitney Houston's daughter, Bobbi Kristina, tried to stab her mother. No word yet as to how much of her rage Bobbi Kristina blames on her name. [INO]
• Forbes says Gisele Bundchen now makes more money annually than every other person who stands around and has their picture taken wearing clothes and make-up. [ICYDK]
• Pete Wentz is being sued for assault and, unfortunately, the case has nothing to do with his music and our ears. [Yeeeah]
• You want mayo and shrimp on that pizza slice? Why are puking everywhere? [CityRag]
• Leather daddy will forever be a good look. Well done, Travolta. [CityRag]
• "Scientology boot camp is probably filled with a bunch of suppressed homos that are just aching to get their jaws around any cock and ass." [DListed]
• Another Spears girl is on the way. And this one will have many more issues than the first two. Huzzah! [PS]
• Patrick Dempsey is campaigning to win the title of "Sexiest Man Alive" this year, which is not the least bit sexy. [INO]
• Benji Madden wrote Paris Hilton a love song entitled "Shine Your Light." It's probably not very good and definitely not original, but Paris only knows what's in front of her, so she loves it. [ICYDK]
• Is Mariah Carey really engaged to Nick Cannon? Thank goodness those two are out of the dating pool! [Yeeeah]
Guess who turned 30 years old over the weekend! Give up? It's this beautiful human being at left.
Perez Hilton celebrated what he called his "Quinceanera Part 2" at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel — yes, the Beverly Wilshire actually let this man on the premises. Don't ask us why.
In honor of this special occasion, "friends" of Perez showed up to take pictures on the red carpet and make nice with the man who could potentially ruin their reputations. The typical famewhores were in attendance, including Speidi, Nick Cannon, Jerry O'Connell and Harvey Levin … but Marc Jacobs? We are disappointed in you.
And Kim Vo, bless his heart, has taken the Britney failure a lot harder than expected. It's OK that you couldn't fix that tranny mess, honey — her hair is something that can only be tamed by Ken Paves. That doesn't mean you need to show up with "Viva Perez" sharpie'd on your shirt.
Let's play a fun game. It's called "What the Hell is [insert D-lister's name here] Doing at Sundance?"
[Source]
• Smiths reference! Can you find it? [DListed]
• Ashley Olsen takes in The Police without Lance Armstrong. Before his time? [PS]
• Sexy animals costumes are weird, because they seem to intend to promote zoophilic feelings. [HT]
• "Daddy's Little Girl" tattoo right next to the crotch. Interesting, but not! [ICYDK]
• Winehouse and Doherty: The Booziest Show on Earth! [INO]
• Paris wears a camouflage miniskirt to show solidarity with our men and women overseas. Or maybe it was just "cute." [Yeeeah]
• Get green in '08! [CityRag]
• Nick Cannon attempts to defile another beauty queen. [EBG]
• Jossip Initiatives' very own intern Whitney takes an indefensible position. Good luck, and heat up my coffee. [Queerty]
• Don't do it, Djimon! She's a blood diamond incarnate. [NYP]
• Nick Cannon calls himself a reformed player and proves he is definitely still a loser. [Glitterati]
• Four times as boring. [HT]
• Robin Givens is horny. She wants to do it. Ride it. His pony. [INO]
• Bloggers immediately brushing off Time Inc's demand to not publish Dempsey twin photos. [ICYDK]
• Call girls spilling secret. Rule 1: Always have some Wet Ones around. [Jossip]
• Now, even looking your age is bad. [NYT]
• Harry Potter full frontal. Isn't this pic illegal? Seriously. [DListed]
• Be the first kid on your block to suffer the painful destruction of public humiliation! [Glitterati]
• Anna Nicole's assistant says Stern's a nice guy and that he would never hurt her. [INO]
• Pretty sure Gwen's baby has a fauxhawk. Can we cool it with the "hip baby" stuff? [ICYDK]
• Bilson's mother could tell that she lost her v-card just by looking at her, meaning she has the world's most useless superpower. [HT]
• If you have a tattoo of Rodney Dangerfield from Back to School, you are automatically welcome in my home. [NYT]
• The host of that piece of shit Wild'n Out tricked that model into marrying him. How come titles of shows with black stars have to be spelled wrong? Let's try to change that soon. [ASL]
• Finally, someone willing to speak out against the relentless bitching of people who don't like DUIs. [IDLYITW]
• I'm thinking about suing Michael Jackson for my coffee being too cold at Starbucks right now. I'm sure he has something to do with it. [Queerty]
• Nick Cannon still playing way out of his league. [Star]
• I doubt the No Doubt reunion will be spectacular. [ICYDK]
• The boobs should never be bigger than the pregnant belly. [HT]
• Think this means they'll have to do the bunny hop? [ASL]
• Grey's Anatomy spin-off to have 100 percent less Isaiah Washington. [JJ]
• I'm from Rolling Stone and I need two double espressos. [Jossip]
I'm not certain what the rules and regulations are in regard to obtaining free stuff at Sundance but, judging from these photos, it looks as if practically anyone can walk in and leave with armfuls of crap they could afford to buy themselves.
A quick scan of Screech's recent work shows he hasn't done a film since 2005 and that his next movie—a story of a time-traveling Hamlet, seriously—isn't being released until later this year, probably in conjunction with his feculent sex tape. But looking at this picture, you'd never guess dude's career was on the decline. If you look closely, you can see that even Screech himself is shocked that they didn't put him out on his ass. Wide eyed, mouth agape, he looks like a klepto who just got away with a heavy haul.
The rest of the photos are no better. There's Nick Cannon, who's covered in gold crowns and looks like a baby playing dress-up. Some guy named Scott Speedman who looks strikingly similar to Benjamin McKenzie. And, speaking of the sinking OC ship, there's the lovable Adam Brody.
The worst thing about trying to take a condescending look at this swag thing is that I'm not above it, and that kinda hurts. Were the offer there, I'm sure I would leave with BOATLOADS of stuff, and I have to admit that to myself. I would horde watches, plane tickets, spa passes, cameras, all of it. Whatever I didn't want I would give to my friends and family and, if I got bored with any of it, I would break it so that others couldn't enjoy it. Help me.
[Source]
Sylist (scratch the "celebrity" part, as she prefers) Rachel Zoe lent her fashion expertise to the stars at this weekend's GM Style Show in Detroit. She may look all helpful here, but you know that as soon as the camera left she berated Carmen Electra, Maria Menounos and Nick
Cannon for being such heifers.
[Source]
Bobby premiered in LA last night at the black tie opening night gala of AFI Fest (phew, that's a mouthful) and all the film's stars were out to celebrate. Lindsay Lohan looked kinda pissed despite smiling (as per usual these days). Demi Moore looked gorgeous, but creepily young (lay off the 'tox, sweetie). Everyone else looked nice, but unthrilling. Somehow, though, Ashton Kutcher still seems to come off like he's a kid who had to dress up fancy 'cause his mom said so. At least his wife's body is as smooth as the day she was born. Ew.
Editor
